Today, while making dinner I cut my finger badly with a knife. When I yelled for my dad to drive me to the hospital, he accused me of lying to get attention. He had to taste my blood before he decided it wasn't red-colored corn syrup. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was rushing with the dishes when I scraped against a very sharp knife, which left a noticeable cut right down my wrist. No one believes my story that it was a freak kitchen accident, they think that I’m either an attention seeking fucknut, or crying out for help. FML
Today, I washed the dishes for my mom while she was out, as they seemed to be piling up. I accidentally sliced my hand with a knife in the process. After a trip to the hospital, it was revealed she'd been leaving those dishes there "to teach dad a lesson." FML
Today, while grabbing a husk of corn out of the boiling hot pot, I splashed hot water on my neck, dropped the corn on my injured toe, and cut myself on the counters, all while my family laughed at my pain. FML
Today, while I was cutting myself some watermelon, my mom walked in. I could tell she hadn't taken her medication in a while because she freaked out, grabbed the knife, and burst into tears before yelling at me, saying I could have cut myself and bled out. FML
Today, my parents kept overreacting over stupid stuff during dinner. I found a hair in a dish, so I removed it myself. My mom goes, "Is that a hair? Is it?! I'll get rid of it!" I told her that I'd already done it myself. Then, because I bit my nail once, my dad constantly kept asking if I was OK, even though I'd said I was. He wouldn't stop! FML
Today, I was cooking dinner for my children, managing for once not to screw up and hurt myself. Then, while chopping vegetables, I accidentally sliced my finger open. The same finger that was still covered in juice from a lemon I'd just squeezed. FML
Today, I slipped and fell down the stairs, landing hard on my knee. Through my screams of agony, my mom accused me of exaggerating the pain, and said I was just being an attention seeker, before finally taking me to hospital. I was told my leg was broken. She refused to apologize. FML
Today, I cut myself pretty badly with a knife. I was bleeding quite a lot, so I yelled to my husband to bring me some kitchen roll, along with the first aid kit. He rushed in with the roll… to clean the floor. FML
Today, I was emptying the cutlery section of the dishwasher when I reached down and accidentally got the tip of a steak knife wedged half-way under my fingernail. My mum yelled at me for getting blood on the clean dishes. FML
Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for 4 hours in the emergency room, the doctor told me I was missing too much flesh to qualify for stitches. He then called 2 other doctors in to examine it. Apparently they had a contest for patient with most ridiculous injury. I won. FML
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Top comments
fadingaway 17
That's creepy. Either your dad is a vampire or you lie for attention a lot.
boojie97 12
That's nasty.
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Comments (83)
boojie97 12
That's nasty.
pickles1994 18
That is far beyond nasty, I just can't find the right word... I want to say incest!
Curiousmaknae 5
....how is that incest?
sexxxysydney 14
Do you know what incest is 11? Cause, yahh that's pretty disgusting, but it's no where near the definition of incest.
JenkJenks 6
In many cultures drinking blood is a healthy lifestyle. I once saw a biography on Wesley Snipes, and he had to drink blood to survive.
XxDevilxXGt 26
Drinking blood is not practical to survive. It is considered a food, and requires more for the body to digest it than what it provides. +may contract diseases.
joshiepo0 18
1- I imagined you're comment with the voice of Cleveland.
JenkJenks 6
Clearly I was kidding and talking about the Blade movies... Which I know are not actual biographies. Didn't think I'd have to explain that one.
BeccaHugs 17
Hepatitis, anyone?
X_Codes 11
@53 - Sorry, but there are a lot of legitimately stupid people on the internet. Are they as stupid as someone who might make your comment? Well, we can't really be sure...
SRU_Toronto 5
Getting AIDS isn't "healthy", Isaac Newton...
TML329 14
I don't think blade drinks blood in those movies
littlejx_fml 7
bloody dad.
fadingaway 17
That's creepy. Either your dad is a vampire or you lie for attention a lot.
FastidiousPear 6
He's gonna get your AIDS!
ermagherdaturdis 26
What is corn syrup? It's sounds vile.
drkrissy1331 12
Is there reason for him to think you were lying? Like the little boy who cried wolf. If not, what a great dad!
amillionbucks 5
Queue vampire comments.
LaughinStock 16
Heard they're reforming the Dawnguard. Vampire hunters or something, in the old fort near Riften. Might consider joining up myself.
crduncan 6
Line of vampire comments?
abbiyroad 16
*Cue
zero91 4
10 , becareful or you end up a vampire too .. people will randomly att you
Schizomaniac 24
Either your dad is insane and had no reason to suspect that you were actually lying, or your past might have led him to believe you would do such a thing. Hm. In any case, hold the bloody knife in your hand and say very seriously, "This is what happens to my enemies." Stare very deeply into his eyes. Very deeply.
Catkam623 27
If I ever meet you I'm running the other way
BlowinChronic 18
Have you taken extended measures before this happened to make it look like you've injured yourself?
CsHx 16
Does your dad think the 5 second rule doesn't apply for dropping floss in the toilet too?
CsHx 16
does apply*
SillyGirl4602 23
The fml you referenced has nothing to do with this fml.
Mirorbo 27
It's amazing how much parents will claim their children are craving attention whenever they are hurt... Now that I think of it, I think we were long overdue for another 'attention-seeking-injury-assumption' FML.
Schizomaniac 24
"Stop acting like getting hit by that car and then slamming into the pavement hurt, you faker! It was barely even moving!"
Mirorbo 27
I wouldn't be surprised to see an FML like that after all I've seen since finding this site...
Enslaved 38
It amazes me how many times I've witnessed someone's toddler/young child get hurt (ex: run and skin their knees) and instead of the parent comforting their child, they yell at them for not being "more careful". Like the parent can't be bothered. I understand them wanting to toughen up their kids but in that moment, I find it heartless and cruel. ***sorry about my mini ramp. Saw bad parenting skills yesterday and then realized it's more common than I'd hoped.
Stardew 19
I personally don't think it is wise to coddle (not 100% sure on that spelling) a child whenever they get hurt. It seems to create children/people who cry and want comfort over the smallest things. For example, my mom never made a big deal over injuries. Instead, she let me learn from them. Recently at work, I bashed my head on a pole and had a very large, very deep crescent shaped cut with blood running down my face. Did I scream and cry, acting like I was dying? No, I went to my manager and asked if I had a big cut on my head. He freaked out and said I would probably need stitches (I wore a bandage for two days, no stitches). Even after seeing the cut I didn't make a big deal over it and I think it was in large part to no one making a fuss over my scraped knees as a child. Sorry that was so long :/
DocBastard 40
Stardew, you're my hero for not freaking out in the face of a life-threatening injury. Bravo. There's a difference between coddling a child and tending to a serious injury. It's people like you who don't listen to their children's complaints and cause more harm than good.
Enslaved 38
I might not have made my comment as clear as I had hoped. I wasn't talking about babying such as, "Awe, poor baby, let me kiss your boo-boo" scraped knee. I was speaking about a parent that did indeed have to tend to the wound because blood was gushing everywhere and instead of staying calm and reassuring their kid that they'll be fine, they screamed at the panicked child causing more anxiety. A young child should feel comfortable going up to their parent without feeling as if they're a burden for getting hurt.
Stardew 19
Sorry, I missed "badly" when I read through it the first time.
Catkam623 27
Stardew did you at least play the sympathy card afterwards( yea it's pretty bad, nah it's no big deal I've had worse, etc?)
KyleHolt 7
Haha well jokes on him he licked your blood!! Eww