Today, my sister was on shrooms. I wasn't able to tackle her before she called the cops to say that her books were trying to eat her face off. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 15 year-old sister came home at 4 a.m. totally stoned. My parents treated her really nicely and woke me up. I'm now grounded until I go college for being a bad influence. I volunteer at schools to talk about drug abuse. FML
Today, my drunk sister threw up on me while I was sleeping. FML
Today, I discovered my sister has a crystal meth problem when she set fire to our house. FML
Today, because I wouldn’t let my little sister have any more cookies, she snuck into my room while I was sleeping and superglued my lips together. FML
Today, my little sister chased me around the house with a mallet, giggling like a maniac. I ended up having to pin her to the ground, rip the mallet out of her hand and lock her in the bathroom. This isn't the first time. My mom still insists it's perfectly normal. FML
Today, I caught my sister eating crayons. She's 19. FML
Today, I saw my sister’s husband kissing another woman in a restaurant. I lost it, flipped their table, and got the cops called on all of us. Turns out they’re poly and she’s their third. Or she was going to be. My sister is now mad at me for “scaring her off”. My bad. FML
Today, I was standing in the shower drying off when my sister came in the bathroom. She must have thought I was a burglar because she hit the shower curtain and punched me in the face. FML
Today, my girlfriend ran off with my sister. FML
Today, I had to calm my hallucinating mom after she accidentally overdosed on one of her pills, then spend ages trying to protect her from the "monkey" on the wall. FML
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Top comments
iLazy 0
Blame Mario for spreading the shroom trend
YayorNay 8
More like FYL, her books were trying to eat her face.
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Comments (197)
FLChicken 0
Harry Potter style!
maggiemae14 2
FHL, I hope her face is okay!
Deeznutzhairy 7
that's nothing when I take shrooms I'm in the middle of the ocean with jaws
tanntann 0
i did shrooms once and i imagined birds that wanted to be kills so i got a BBQ lighter to shoot them. and then i saw a stone bunny and sang justin bieber to it. my mom just laughed her ass ofd as she watch and videoed it
alex6946 10
your mother didn't care!? if my mom ever caught me, I'd get my ass whooped!
WildInTheStreets 5
your sister sounds like a fun person.
Sunny_Eclipse 6
Oh man, that is too f'ed up... FYL...
j_cat187 20
scary shit happens when shrooms are involved. like trying to jump out the top floor of a two story building because your friend claims he's the devil. scariest day ever.
docscientist 10
A small dose of psilocybin seems to have long lasting therapeutic effects, while a high dose causes fear and paranoia. I think your sister needed more.
Memeguy76 0
My advice. Don't let her play any Mario.
lulzworthy 3
FYI Psilocin/Psilocybin Mushrooms are not THAT hallucinogenic, this FML is bullshit.