Today, my sister's boyfriend said the only thing he'd change about her was her last name. My boyfriend told me he'd change the shape of my nose. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I asked my sister what she thought of my boyfriend. She said, "He's nice. Deserves better than you, really." FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him, saying that the only thing he would change about me is my last name. I later told him that I wanted to keep my last name after the marriage. I'm now single again. FML
Today, my pregnant sister has apparently always loved my boyfriend's name and wants to give it to her child. She expects me to break up with my boyfriend so "it doesn't get weird." FML
Today, I noticed that my boyfriend's sister looks at my ass more than my boyfriend does. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to meet his parents. Right when I arrived, his little sister said, "She's a lot fatter than you said!" FML
Today, my boyfriend left me for his sister. No, not my sister. His sister. FML
Today, me and the guy I was dating ran into my sister at the mall. He took one look at her and mumbled, "Great, I chose the ugly one" under his breath. FML
Today, my brother and his girlfriend are fighting about something they agreed on YEARS ago. Every couple of months this argument comes back and his girlfriend changes the rules or the definition. I can’t believe she gonna become my sister-in-law. FML
Today, I told my family that I wanted to change my last name to my future wife's. We want to have the same last name, and we chose hers because she is an only child, while I have three brothers. Half of my family is laughing and calling me "pussy whipped" while the other half won't speak to me. FML
Today, my sister called me and asked if my boyfriend of 3 years had proposed to me yet. And now the surprise is ruined. FML
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Top comments
Blacksxe 1
Tell him you would change the size of his penis.
perdix 31
If the sister gets a new name, she won't be able to date anyone else. But if you get your bulbous, misshapen, grotesque banana nose fixed, you'll be able to have your choice of many more guys!
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Comments (104)
mbrooks5110 0
Why do woman ask men questions they do not want honest answers to...
xXxIracebethxXx 14
Where in the FML does it say she asked?
abbyhoneywaffles 11
women**
Llamacod 11
It's implied. He wouldn't just say it unless asked
IndigoAcrylic 9
Yaaa...I got my face slapped afew times for answering honestly to a woman xD
Mister_Triangle 21
Because they want dishonest answers
rohanmo 9
80 - nice hair u hav there in ur picture ^^
Michyxo 14
At least your boyfriend isn't pushing you to take his last name. I thought that was something women were able to decide for themselves now.
Llamacod 11
I'm pretty sure women always had a choice in that, at least for the last 50 or so years. When you apply for a marriage license you get a free name change, so both man and woman could change names if wanted
cBlackout 13
So your boyfriend is an aesthetician ? :)
hateevryone 15
punch him in his nose.
roadie42 21
I was just going to say that...change the shape of HIS nose instead =P
slimjim8094 12
Today my girlfriend made fun of my nose, so I punched her in the face. I'm so ******* sick of this double standard. It's not ok to punch people because you don't like what they've said. Didn't you pick that up in kindergarten?
jpoole 4
Sounds like you got a real dick on your hands. Tell him his penis looks like a squash.
DynamicDave 11
If her nose is that bad, she might have a dick on her face! Haha, I kid.
pokemai 6
I would have changed your sense of humor.. Dont you just think he was joking maybe ? Anyway, he's your boyfriend so he loves you anyway.. :)
akayc32 0
19, yeah, because when you date someone you automatically love them?
pokemai 6
Nah.. True shit .. :/ But I would assume that he find her attractive :) Okay .. Maybe it does suck a little .. But maybe he was just joking :)
Rowen37 0
Get a new man baby
Awsemogreeb 19
In what way is a grown man that wears nappies an improvement?
beebananaz88 0
Sounds like something a plastic surgen would say to his girlfriend...
soresage 1
Your sister has a douche of a boyfriend, the type of creep who blows smoke up your ass while sneaking around. You have an honest guy who treats you as if you are an equal and a friend. Bitches need to wake the f up.
Ilikeurfmls 13
Read it again.
radarie 6
lol, not everyone is so cynical...
Gregsgirl4ever 0
I'm not sure how you came to that conclusion. I think he was unnecessarily rude, but some people will turn anything into a bitter discussion about women.
pokemai 6
I like honesty
Katastrophe101 8
I think a simple "nothing" would suffice.