Today, my sister gave my laptop away and dumped a pile of her hamster's turds on my bed. All of this because I flushed the toilet while she was in the shower last night. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I insulted my younger sister's hamster. She then smashed me with a stool. FML
Today, my little sister was in charge of doing the vacuuming, when she decided our hamster had "dust on his back". FML
Today, my house was broken into. Nothing was stolen, but my laptop had feces smeared all over it. FML
Today, my little sister got mad at me because I wouldn't let her read my IM conversation. I took a nap and when I woke up, my laptop was gone. She took it on a trip to her grandparents' house, six hours away. Nude pictures of me and my paper due tomorrow are on the laptop. FML
Today, my sister's kitten walked away from his litter box, jumped onto the table, looked me dead in the eyes, then peed directly onto my laptop. FML
Today, my little sister took a dump in our bath tub right before we were leaving for soccer practice. When my mom found it, she blamed it on me, then made me pick it up with my bare hands. FML
Today, my sister brought her class hamster home from school. Somehow it escaped from its cage, and ran into my room. My boyfriend, thinking it was a mouse, stomped on it. I'm stuck cleaning hamster guts from my carpet, and have to explain to a kindergarten class what happened to their pet. FML
Today, my family came back from holiday to discover that my little sister had messed with the cat flap before we left. Several stray cats were able to come in, but were unable to get out, and left shit in various areas around the house. FML
Today, I accidentally left my sister's hamster's cage open and it escaped. My dad recently put mouse traps down. Guess where I found her. FML
Today, I dropped my keys in the toilet. While in the kitchen looking for something to fish them out with, I heard a door slam. My sister had to use the bathroom and didn’t see my keys in the toilet before sitting down. Lucky me, I caught her just as she was about to flush. FML
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Top comments
Omfgitsmia 15
Sell her on the black market and call it even
notjanedoe 27
Your sister is nuts. What are your parents saying about this?
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Comments (173)
GrammarNazis 6
In my experience, the whole shower/toilet thing is a myth anyways. I guess I'm wrong though, mabye its one of those things that only happens sometimes.
Dairyking 8
No, it's real; it's just that most pipe systems these days are set up in a manner so that this won't be such a problem.
cupcakechick 17
@32 maybe* some grammar nazi you are
Driving_Gaming 22
haha You caught him out.
Supahnova 14
Tell your parents of her malicious behavior. An overreaction like that needs discipline, not more retaliation.
ninaskyez 12
Let her hamster roam around her room freely so it will pee n poop everywhere then put baby oil on the shower floor:)
3rdbass 9
Imagine the poor hamster's thoughts! "hey, hey those are my turds! Don't do that! Now I look like I'm in cahoots with you."
longtimesunshine 4
sounds like my sister. FYL
crammer1 6
From what I can gather, this probably isn't the first time he's done it. OP is always innocent right? I don't care what anyone says. Usually you have a few warnings before it gets to this point.
titibug823 11
I say go to your parents... She overreacted and needs disciplined.
ni0ve 9
so was she cremated or buried?
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Make her go get your laptop or sell everything in her room until you acquire enough to buy a new one. But first and foremost put a new lock on your door. She grossly overreacted.
lonewolf621 17
What about the gold fish?
mrd97 10
Where in this FML does it mention gold fish? Oh wait, it doesn't.
truepanda 2
ok this so ridiculous that im not sure i believe u. if it is true then play a revenge on her and make it dirty. if ur parents dont say anything then u have one ****** up parents