Today, my sister gave my laptop away and dumped a pile of her hamster's turds on my bed. All of this because I flushed the toilet while she was in the shower last night. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I insulted my younger sister's hamster. She then smashed me with a stool. FML
Today, my little sister was in charge of doing the vacuuming, when she decided our hamster had "dust on his back". FML
Today, my house was broken into. Nothing was stolen, but my laptop had feces smeared all over it. FML
Today, my little sister got mad at me because I wouldn't let her read my IM conversation. I took a nap and when I woke up, my laptop was gone. She took it on a trip to her grandparents' house, six hours away. Nude pictures of me and my paper due tomorrow are on the laptop. FML
Today, my sister's kitten walked away from his litter box, jumped onto the table, looked me dead in the eyes, then peed directly onto my laptop. FML
Today, my little sister took a dump in our bath tub right before we were leaving for soccer practice. When my mom found it, she blamed it on me, then made me pick it up with my bare hands. FML
Today, my sister brought her class hamster home from school. Somehow it escaped from its cage, and ran into my room. My boyfriend, thinking it was a mouse, stomped on it. I'm stuck cleaning hamster guts from my carpet, and have to explain to a kindergarten class what happened to their pet. FML
Today, my family came back from holiday to discover that my little sister had messed with the cat flap before we left. Several stray cats were able to come in, but were unable to get out, and left shit in various areas around the house. FML
Today, I accidentally left my sister's hamster's cage open and it escaped. My dad recently put mouse traps down. Guess where I found her. FML
Today, I dropped my keys in the toilet. While in the kitchen looking for something to fish them out with, I heard a door slam. My sister had to use the bathroom and didn’t see my keys in the toilet before sitting down. Lucky me, I caught her just as she was about to flush. FML
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Top comments
Omfgitsmia 15
Sell her on the black market and call it even
notjanedoe 27
Your sister is nuts. What are your parents saying about this?
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Comments (173)
notjanedoe 27
Your sister is nuts. What are your parents saying about this?
SmallyBigs 9
I'm more concerned of her sister collecting the turds to do this
Snowkeys 11
A hamsters life consists of eating, sleeping and ********. They fill up a cage pretty fast if you don't clean it regularly.
Shenanigans9 8
It's 2013, who doesn't have a hamster turd collection? Some of the can be quite... Exquisite
CoDmastaThe1st 7
Lol
AKGirlinSD 20
1, I was wondering too. What if the siblings are over 18? Yes, there are house rules, but it is more common for the kids to live with their parents til their mid-twenties. Either way, the sister needs get a swift kick in her lady parts! I accidently turned on the water when my boyfriend was showering, last week, and he didn't pick a fight or scream. I apologized and he knew it was an accident. Imagine if some one broke his sister's item that could be so easily fixed or replaced? The sister is sounding psychotic!
sulitak 27
I'm 26 and my sister is 28. if we pulled this shit my parents would STILL have a ton to say about it... And The offending sister would be expected to replace the bedding and laptop. If it happened when we were under 18, whoever we gave it to would be called (or their parents) and the same "work it off" logic would apply.
AKGirlinSD 20
^I'm impressed! Most people, when they turn 18, think they can do what they want, while still living under their parent's roof. I've always been respectful of what the house rules are (when visiting; I've been on my own since 18) and it is nice to see that other people are too.
Omfgitsmia 15
Sell her on the black market and call it even
wldd0g 9
Time to butter the floor the next time she showers.
jessi_sunshine 26
Better yet -- soap it.
lilhellian 27
2 If taken has proven anything.. It's that if by some chance she's actually a virgin, op could make hundred of thousands off of her on the black market...
GoWithTheFro 10
35, that is extremely creepy.
lilhellian 27
41 If you want creepy. Google "kagome kagome" and read the creepypasta..
R4inb0wBrit3 13
45, that isn't creepy. That's sick.
mrperspire 4
Buy yourself another one with her money.
zango1 15
Selling her on the black market may be harsh. Empty her shampoo bottle and replace it with hair remover.
sonuskos 6
Im freaked out now 45... I'll forever be scared of children now
Han1156 23
45 That was not creepy, sort of interesting, but very sick.
twaumat 28
88 or hair dye
happylappy 21
35's comment wasn't all that creepy. To know that all you'd have to have done was watch the movie Taken.
Tiger9099 11
#15 that sounds like a devilishly good idea.
SeepingSarcasm 7
Yeah, that's pretty ******* creepy...could've gone without Googling that shit...ever.
wldd0g 9
Glad you liked it 124
bamagrl410 31
45, how in the world did you come across that? I feel like it should be the plot for some horrible and twisted horror movie, and I'm forever creeped out by that.
AaronLlama 12
Better Add That To My "Never Read Creepypasta" list
doodieman 9
Just give her away.
twaumat 28
something like post her picture around the neighborhood saying 'found lost girl'?
margojill 13
She collects her hamster's turds?
rattusrattus 19
Hamsters do vast quantities of poop in a small space of time. Depending on how often she cleans the cage, she could have just pulled out what was in there and had a goodly amount.
RainbowDashie140 12
Goodly? That's not a word.
Mossears133 15
49- You insult Dashie with your sparse vocabulary! Shame!!!!!!
evilplatypus 39
49 - ~Neither is "dictionary" apparently...~
Willisbosh 5
Your sister has some issues....
waterpolohezy 6
I think they stem from the home. Maybe even cold water. Meh but what do I know
notforbirds 9
Something makes me suspect that there's more to the story
grafeety 9
If someone's hot water tank is set improperly, flushing the toilet could result in first or second degree burns. The sister's reaction might be more reasonable if that's the case.
NeatNit 33
Not really. Forget the hamster shit, she gave her laptop away! There were probably tons of personal documents, pictures, and whatnot on that thing! This was clearly an honest mistake. Sister is just a self-centered bitch who deserves to live on the street for a few days, maybe that'll teach her a thing or two.
grafeety 9
Pretty sure I'd overreact as well if my entire body was burnt, including some of the more sensitive parts.
Abbbiiieeeeeeeee 16
"Some". Lol, more like a ton of issues.
Xotoolyxo 16
Move out as soon as you can
SilentScreamer 12
Give away her hamster and break something of hers.
nidie 7
Apologies to her is a better way to solve problem.
9lashes 15
-87 why is she apologizing for her sister acting like a nut job?
hsRoseTyler5 14
Break her hamster? I kid.
ElementaryEdGuy 18
Well that's a shitty situ- I wonder if I can thumbs myself down before a post?
DubstepCrazyXD 11
For gods sakes leave this old, dusty pun alone and let it rest in pieces.
ElementaryEdGuy 18
That was kinda my point.
Pleonasm 36
They're trying to say don't even mention it. It's like mentioning Justin Bieber on every youtube video just to make fun of him; don't even bring that here. That's what they mean.
mangoboy1 19
Make her buy you a new laptop and bed.
DubstepCrazyXD 11
I'll be looking forward to seeing an FML from OP's sister about how she got hot water turned completely off during her shower and her hamster's shit all over her bed too.
Mr_Satan 11
screw that, true payback has lasting damage, turn off the cold water instead
DakotaAkira 13
Maybe OPs sister was the one using a shower head down there..
DubstepCrazyXD 11
True 42, but I don't think OP wants to be responsible for his sisters hospital visit for 3rd Degree burns.