Today, I was approached by a What Not to Wear kind of show, where you get money to buy a new wardrobe. I was so excited that I fainted. They revoked the offer, reasoning that someone who faints so easily would be too much of a liability risk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went to a very important job interview. I was so nervous that I passed out right in front of the interviewer's desk. FML
Keeping up appearances
Today, my friends gave me a complete makeover, which included clothes from their wardrobe, to prepare me for an upcoming job interview. I was then declined the position, because apparently, I "looked too wealthy" to need the job. FML
Don't mind me
Today, I was shopping in a packed store when I started to feel faint. Since I was quite far along in the queue, I tried to hold out until I reached the front of the queue. Good news: I succeeded. Bad news: I then fainted at the counter, hit my nose, and shit myself. FML
Today, I had my first interview in over a year. I panicked and passed out. FML
Assumptions
Today, at work, I had some palpitations, which ultimately caused me to become hot, dizzy, and pass out. I couldn't go home because we were so short staffed, and three different colleagues asked me if I was pregnant. FML
Pump it up
Today, I'd signed up to try a workout class at the gym. However, as soon as the instructor started the class, I realized it was much more intense than I had anticipated. I ended up passing out and had to be carried out of the class by the instructor. FML
Blood drive
Today, I tried donating blood for the first time because my company was hosting a blood drive. Right after telling everyone I wasn't afraid of needles, I fainted before they could even use one. I woke up surrounded by phlebotomists offering me juice while my coworkers whooped like I'd just scored a goal. FML
Today, I passed out on the way to work. Some lucky passerby took this as an opportunity to help themself to my purse. FML
Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML
That went well
Today, I went to a big job interview. As I walked in, I tripped and fell flat on my face. Other highlights include my voice cracking multiple times, sweating profusely and getting uncontrollable nervous giggling. The interviewer eventually stared at me in disbelief and asked if I was high. FML
Top comments
littlemonster94 15
You sure your wardrobe wasn't the actual liability risk?
jessherself13 21
Well OP, I'm inclined to agree with them. That's hardly something to faint over. Although if it was a "What Not To Wear" type show, you've been insulted by them twice. You're apparently poorly dressed AND a liability.
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Comments (39)
littlemonster94 15
You sure your wardrobe wasn't the actual liability risk?
TwiztedYuri 9
looks like OP will never find out.
lonewolf621 17
LOL
zandalee 20
I feel your pain OP. A free wardrobe with no mistake items that make you look 12 or retarded, is a simple fantasy of mine. Oh and to meet Suzanna and Trinny... *swoon*
crazytwinsmom 25
You have to pay taxes on the value of the wardrobe. So, it's not free, but about half price.
AKGirlinSD 20
^People never seem to think about those things. Nothing is free in USA. If it is free, you're getting taxed a ton of money. That's why if someone gives away a vehicle, you ask them to write down that they sold it for $100, give or take, on the pink slip so the buyer/receiver only has to pay minimum taxes. Otherwise, the DMV determines how much the vehicle is worth and taxes the shit out of the receiver of the free vehicle.
evilplatypus 39
If it's a prize, it becomes "additional income" which could potentially boost you up into a higher tax bracket and you'll pay your regular tax percentage on i (so if you fall in the 20% bracket, you'll pay 20% of the prize value). That's it. If it's a gift, the IRS website says gift taxes are paid by the donor, unless the donee agrees otherwise.
crazytwinsmom 25
They don't know your tax bracket when you get the prize. If you win a car, then you have to pay the tax on the value of the car before you can take the car. You can't take it and sell it to pay the tax afterwards since you have to pay the tax upfront.
yoyoforpeace 14
Maybe you should be approached by a how not to faint kind of show?
ladytigerhunts 20
That's their loss; you deserve a style!
IAmJad 18
I fail to understand why it's their loss.
musicalnoodles23 5
That really stinks, OP. but when you think about it, they were kind of insulting you...
waterpolohezy 6
Hey bud, I think you missed the point. OP was excited about the opportunity to change his/her already insulting wardrobe. Anyone else see that too?
evilplatypus 39
4 - You can insult my wardrobe, me, my mother, whatever you want if you're going to buy me a new wardrobe! Clothes have the least financial priority in my world, so I often look rather...um..."creatively" attired.
Ameel_fml 19
I'm kind of confused by the OP and why they fainted. If OP knows he/she doesn't dress well and wants to change it, then why doesn't he/she change it? Sure clothes can be expensive, but if you're really embarrassed of your clothing to the point where the prospect of someone buying you better clothes makes you faint, I think that's a sign OP should probably put more effort into their attire. And hell, there are plenty of cheap stores and thrift shops that have nice looking clothes for a bargain price. You don't have to spend big to look nice.
BadKitty14 7
42, some people find it hard to style themselves, and need an expert opinion. It may not have anything to do with money :)
Wimoweh 10
Well, my expert opinion is to not hang around people who judge you based on what you wear instead of who you are. For all you know, that seemingly homeless man could actually be a brilliant scientist who just so happens to really, really like dirt.
Ameel_fml 19
#46: That's true. I didn't think of that. Still, if OP is really that bothered by how he/she dresses, then they can always get the opinions of others, or look in fashion magazines, or even look online at what are the latest trends this season. I mean, clothing isn't that important, but OP is clearly bothered by how he/she dresses and wants to change it.
BlackRogue 8
48, do you know my family, because you just described both my mother and father... They're horticulturists and mom is also a biochemist and geneticist. They both really, really like dirt lol!
evilplatypus 39
59 - Or, you know, OP was excited because they're getting a lot of something for free and get to be on television. Perhaps their wardrobe doesn't bug them at all.
asdfghjklmoo 15
@42 It doesn't say that OP doesn't like their clothes and she was not embarrassed. It says she was so excited she fainted. She could've fainted due to the excitement of getting a whole new wardrobe for free or the excitement of being on a television show.
jessherself13 21
Well OP, I'm inclined to agree with them. That's hardly something to faint over. Although if it was a "What Not To Wear" type show, you've been insulted by them twice. You're apparently poorly dressed AND a liability.
skyenoelle 15
Well, sounds to me like you're still in need of an update to your wardrobe.
McNikk 15
I understand why they did what they did but I feel sorry for you too since it's not something you can control.
cb1002630 11
Should have asked them to give you a fashionable head guard to compensate for the liability. Seems like they should already know this.
yoursucklives 36
wow. i would feel insulted if someone wanted me for such a show. but if you don't have the money and therefore have to wear old clothes from your siblings or someone else, i can understand your excitement.
browneyedgirl52 13
Well now you don't have the public humiliation of being on the show and you can get yourself a new wardrobe!