Today, my school is having a mandatory class on etiquette. We've just now progressed onto forks after a long, tedious discussion on spoons. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was eager to learn how to use chopsticks, as I was in a nice Chinese restaurant and had ordered noodles. As I was visibly struggling to eat, the server brought me a fork. When I reached for it, I flicked a noodle into a lady's soup at the next table. FML
Today, I was so bored that I spent two hours researching the history of spoons. FML
Today, I ate out, even though I was tired. When my main course arrived, I realised I had sent both my forks away with the starter plate. Rather than say anything, I ate dinner with two knives. FML
Today, a white guy tried to teach me to use chopsticks properly. I'm Chinese and have been using them since I could eat. FML
Today, during my second day on the job, I ate pasta with a pen in the backroom. My old job provided plasticware, and it never occurred to me to pack a fork. FML
Today, I was doing my homework on the computer when my dad walked by with a plate of food, threw his fork at me, and said "POSTURE!" FML
Today, my mom insisted on making my lunch. She didn't know that knives are banned at my high school, and packed me a steak knife for cream cheese. I'm now suspended for 7 days, and she refuses to say that she did anything wrong. FML
Today, my freshman students got in a fist fight over a chair. FML
Today, in the class I'm teaching, I assigned my students an essay to complete for homework. One student asked me if I was deducting points for bad spelling. I teach English. FML
Today, I learned that my aunt, who lives with us, is using our chopsticks in her hair and putting them back in the utensil drawer without washing them. I'm the one that uses chopsticks the most. FML
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Top comments
Olovio 5
Bet you can't wait for sporks!
W0 0
Fork your life!!
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Comments (197)
Olovio 5
Bet you can't wait for sporks!
Darth_Naru 0
But knives are the best subject. They can cause bodily harm! ;)
Bakayarou_fml 0
So .. can .. forks .. -_-
Idonebeenhad 17
Only get worried if your instructor asks you to spoon him.
Darth_Naru 0
Well it's not like you here about people being stabbed to death with forks all the time.
TrollsFTW 0
Knives are sharper than forks. Only a retard would try to commit murder with a fork.
imacreeper 3
say fork fork fork fork what do you eat soup with? a ______
stephmariee17 0
lol your school must be really bad :P
DudeImBetter 0
39 I eat soup with my mouth and esophagus, I wonder what you eat soup with.....
oolama 2
39 - I use a spoon..?
imacreeper 3
48, I'm sure it wasn't so totally pointless because some people do need to learn quite a few manners. and I'm sure you wouldnt be thinking the same way if you were out eating at somewhere fancy and there are like 4 different spoons, forks and knives used for it's own purpose.
sydmadhurf 6
sparks suck
sterlingarcher 1
42 haha lol
thefriendlyc 0
so while you are learning etiquette your on your phone? not so pointless
notsocrazee 0
I hear those lessons where you learn to cut chicken can get pretty wild...
keccakec 2
There's etiquette to spooning? Only in America.
allstar2000000 0
wait for the in-depth history of napkins!!
zendaddy0 0
ask him how a plate works and time his answer
imredheehee123 1
39- im so confused...?
herrobear 0
52, honestly, I'd use a fork for my salad and meal, and a spoon for my soup. Knife to cut, and napkin on lap. So no, in that situation, I think common sense would prevail for most people.
Jimster1712 0
first of all, u dont eat soup. and it doesnt work if you only say it for 5 times , needs at least 50 for a good effect
orphinz 3
bowl
woahbro2slow 0
a spoon.
Gravitex 0
39. that only works in real life
CsDy1395 6
this is quite strange. one would assume forks would be the first unit of study.
W0 0
Fork your life!!
qwert1994 0
Wait, how where the knives?
sarah_cheverie 0
Spoon your wife.
JetLifeNextLife 0
or have sex with a knife
rebekahah 7
I see what you did there ;)
snade 0
get off the phone when you are in class...
rebel128 5
or I'll fork you in the ass
EatnBeef 7
then slit your throat with glass.
XxEmoSnowboarder 8
lmfaoooo at 2 17 and 34 hahahahaha
Blake4477 0
That would be creative if it wasn't his name!
EvilPotato 15
2 don't lie you got that from his name. :P
W0 0
i actually never saw that until you pointed that out
SunnyG 0
lol
SMGnow 0
Lovely xD chopsticks!!
fluffyrocka 0
I like spooning...
johnson94 5
let's do the fork in the garbage disposal, let's do the fork in the garbage disposal!
teresa96706 29
Ding ding ding ding ding! awah how I love the yes dance
racer337 2
Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Aha a classic :)
racer337 2
Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Aha a classic :)
Okamigurl 16
Hah!
qwert1994 0
Fork your life?
Outsider_77 0
no. just no
AnagenisisZagus 13
Too late, 26. Go home/
venusvsmars 2
haters..24's joke was cute
sarah_cheverie 0
Something wrong with being polite?
OasC82 0
would you like a lecture on forks?
ItWasAllWorthIt 0
Yeah. It's not really 'impolite' to not know every detail about forks.
EvilPotato 15
65 A little grammar lession won't hurt you, now would it?
lolwutguy 0
137- you're an idiot. obviously he's a potato so he doesn't have to go to school. why you ask? BECAUSE HE'S A FREAKING POTATO.
xxlauruh 0
you're all idiots.
360XBOXFTW 0
i like potatoes
lcarroll 3
Same as a spelling lesson wouldn't hurt you?
EvilPotato 15
dude potatoes rock your socks off
waycool 10
Idiot.
NoraT_fml 6
POTATOES FTW!!!
gorina 0
******* fail, 128.
Norbury 6
There's a big difference between politeness and etiquette. Allowing your guests to eat with whatever cutlery they choose is polite, insisting on using the correct ones is etiquette - so it can be both tedious and impolite.
maidofawesome 0
Well have fun with that
Bakayarou_fml 0
Have your lunch while they talk and say you are learning :)
Bakayarou_fml 0
talk*
agaba 0
haha
TrollsFTW 0
I think OP will do knives before sporks.
qwert1994 0
Ouch, that would suck.
SpeshulK 0
Ouch?
Idonebeenhad 17
Don't spoon the teacher.