Today, my road rage got so out of hand that I'm now actually inclined to honk obnoxiously at my computer when it's being slow. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got angry at my computer, and instead of bashing my keyboard with my fists, I bashed my face on the keyboard. It REALLY hurt. FML
Today, I'm going cold turkey with my drinking and smoking habits. I'm so irritable, I seriously considered running down an old lady who was taking her damn sweet time crossing the road, then shooting the guy in the car behind me for honking at me like I was holding everyone up. FML
Today, my boss flipped me off in traffic on my way to work. FML
Today, I'm so lonely that I get happy when I get attention from car drivers when they honk at me for driving too slowly. FML
Today, a car was tailgating and honking at me while trying to pass me, so I decided to be a bitch back and go extremely slow. We got to a two lane road and the car passed me up. The man in the front seat flipped me off while pointing to his wife in the back seat who was clearly in labor. FML
Today, I got stuck in traffic and angrily honked at the car in front of me. Then I realized it was a hearse. FML
Today, the horn in my car decided to malfunction. It honked continuously for an hour as I drove down the highway. FML
Today, I was running late for a meeting and wound up getting stuck in traffic, which started to stress me out to the point of road rage at no one in particular. When I finally arrived, the meeting had been cancelled. FML
Today, a cop almost rear-ended my car, slammed on the gas with no warning, swerved around me, flipped me the bird, then cut me off and then drove a full ten miles under the speed limit. When I changed lanes to overtake him, he pulled me over for road rage. FML
Today, my mother started cursing at a lady for tooting her horn at her in traffic, because there was "no need for road rage." When I tried to calm her down, she slammed on the brakes and told me to get out and walk. FML
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Top comments
A07 48
Am I the only one wondering how OP honks at the computer?
medic_man 13
it'll probably respond better than the idiots on the road!
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Comments (76)
introductionn 13
Maybe you should seek some help for that, buddy; seems like if its gotten to that point, your road rage problem has gone on for WAY too long.
AlaskanG 27
How are you going to bitch at someone for saying they need help, then write a comment after them saying the exact same thing?
Godsofdracos 15
If I remember correctly, 9 comes before 23.... Plus the context of what she wrote is slightly different and more complete. They actually wrote it at exactly the same time also, so chill a bit buddy.
MzZombicidal 36
#56, they did write it at the same time, but it was still rude on their part to reply on someone's comment with attitude over what it said when they said almost the exact same thing. Lol.
sdesk 9
Modem rage.
aimzskee 30
Go to your happy place, op.
Ilikepie82479 20
Woosah
worldclassrager 41
Usually people either cuss or throw their computers across the room not honk at them
introductionn 13
Good too know, I guess?
ShowMeKay 20
..Because someone throwing their computer across the room is a very normal thing to do? Lol if that's what you do with yours, I think you and OP would both need to attend anger management. P.S. Please don't throw your computer upon reading this comment :/
worldclassrager 41
I use my phone don't worry about it... I can't say that I have but honestly at times I have wanted to...
Ilikepie82479 20
How exactly does that work?
cryssycakesx3 23
*honk*
abbey728 16
Dude. You think that's bad? I've been typing essays for so long that it's become my automatic instinct to press command s on handwritten papers. I feel ya homie.
cryssycakesx3 23
wait til you try to ctrl+z.
JuzReading 23
Or wanting to press ctrl+f when reading through a textbook and you're lazy...
91hayek 31
I will not lie, I do this as well - even with FML comments that I post. It's all muscle memory I suppose.
JRT98 12
I'm no computer genius, but honking at it most definitely will not work... I hope you don't use language that has to be beeped out either.
GrinchFu1 27
Why don't you just punch your computer in it's smug little face like a normal person!?
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
I hit YDI at "my road rage". Nothing justifies acting like the Hulk on the road, even if there are reckless drivers. A good driver keeps a cool head, no matter the circumstances.
ArashiGirl 13
You think that's bad? I got so used to an e reader that I tapped my book once to get to the next page.