Today, I found out the record label I was talking to was actually just my friends who have way too much time on their hands. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my life became a lot more depressing. A while ago, some friends and I founded a "Forever Alone" club, because all of us were single at that time. I'm now the only member left. FML
Today, a rumor was spread around that I was dating somebody. I confronted the person who everyone thought I was dating, and asked him about it. He also thought we were dating. FML
Today, I was told it was inconvenient for me to take lunch breaks, because someone else has to answer the phones and no one else wants to actually do any work. FML
Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa. FML
Today, I overheard my boss stressing out over finding a replacement for me. I didn't know I was leaving. FML
Today, I discovered that my ex-girlfriend, who I dated for 6 years, is getting engaged to my friend. The very same "friend" who's been encouraging me to break up with her for the past year. FML
Today, after an extensive talk with a relationship counselor, we concluded that I'm more likely to get run over by a car than be in a stable relationship. FML
Today, I came home from work to find my son and his friends attempting to find out how many of them could fit into one of my pairs of pants. So far, five. FML
Today, my best friend told me she was pregnant over the phone. While in the middle of telling her congrats, she told me it was with my boyfriend. FML
Today, I wasn't allowed to work from home, despite being ill enough to just take the day off anyway, all so there could be "someone to answer the phone." The phone didn't ring once all day. FML
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Top comments
mpkpm 19
So did you tell them about your hit new single, all my friends are dicks?
91hayek 31
There is another FML where a guy's father pretended to be a publisher that had accepted his manuscript. Sorry OP, insecure people like to pull down those that are making an effort with their lives. Keep your head up.
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Comments (46)
MisterEx 28
Off the record, consider it a rehearsal!
wildsweetchild 19
Cruel of friends to do that, but great advise to see the positive in everything. :)
myGRAM 14
Too*
nana_star 27
Bravo
_parth 20
2
Kamon97 23
A wild swaggot appears!
Rallred32 20
Wow. What is WRONG with this thread?
91hayek 31
There is another FML where a guy's father pretended to be a publisher that had accepted his manuscript. Sorry OP, insecure people like to pull down those that are making an effort with their lives. Keep your head up.
sjbartholome 14
right because playing a joke on your friend = insecurity
mpkpm 19
So did you tell them about your hit new single, all my friends are dicks?
MrSassypants 34
"All my friends are dicks I said all my friends are dicks All they ever do is make me sick They pull a prank just to get a kick Because all my friends are *inhale deeply* ddddiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiicks!"
Awesome_Ninjaz 12
Brilliant!
Lil_Red777 21
Not very good ones apparently.
christian1509 21
Well, time to start plotting your revenge
DocBastard 40
The fact that the label name was "Gullible Records" should have tipped you off.
christian1509 21
I'm gunna go ahead and say terrible friends, and who has the time to do that anyways?
lolnoodles 3
REVENGEEEEE so what are u gonna do to them
Brandi_Faith 34
But sometimes Karma takes years and you're not even around them to see it by then.
Chibi_Kitten 24
#27 Sometimes Karma means you have to take it into your own hands. Karma won't get those friends unless OP has a hand in it.