ironyisabitch
Rohnert Park, United States
Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
lehonX9
Hanover, Germany
Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML
hypercrite dad
United Kingdom
Today, my dad found out I recently tried weed. He called me a useless waste of air and grounded me for the rest of the year. Then he went outside and smoked his third cigarette of the morning. FML
Anonymous
United States
Anger management
Today, my parents tried to apologize for wrongly grounding me. I told them to go fuck themselves, so now I'm re-grounded. FML
valarmorgoolies
This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff
Binghamton, United States
Dope
Today, my mom accused me of smoking weed. Truth is, I'd just ripped the quietest and weirdest smelling fart of my life. She wouldn't believe me, accused me of making stupid excuses up, and grounded me. FML
Anonymous
Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML
Anonymous
Auckland, New Zealand
Today, in a fit of jealousy over my recent muscle growth, my brother told our mom that I've only been going to the gym so I could smoke weed with my friends. She believed him and grounded me. FML
Alyssa
United States
Stoner
Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML
Anonymous
Deland, United States
Today, I tried to blackmail my dad by threatening to tell mom about the bong and weed he keeps hidden in the garage. Turns out she already knew about it and neither of them give a shit. Now I'm grounded until the new year. FML
Anonymous
United States
Bad grandma
Today, I'm grounded for literally the whole summer because my parents found out that I was still seeing my grandma behind their backs, even though they banned her from ever seeing us again after she spanked my sister. FML
say no to dick
Newcastle, Australia
Sneaky dad
Today, I found out that my father faked his whole "mid-life crisis", just so he could gain my trust and get me to admit that I smoke weed, and to tell him who I buy it from. Hello year-long grounding. FML
Top comments
tony1891 22
should have smoked it. at least then it'd be worth getting grounded for.
xFluttershy 7
I tried smoking weed once when I was a little kid, then I found out that there were two kinds of "weed" and I had the wrong kind.
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Comments (246)
LordOfLincoln 6
Your parents shouldn't be allowed to raise children.
GothicAngel17 24
Why, because they get high on occasion instead of getting blind rotten drunk? You're an idiot.
LordOfLincoln 6
Both getting high and getting drunk are unacceptable in front of children. It's a bad example and I hope you never have children if you have such low standards. Dirty druggies should be neutered and removed from society. Idiots like you who accept behaviour like this as normal and OK are just as bad.
DKjazz 20
111- That's really extreme, I think. If you want to become a parent, you can quit weed/alcohol, but you can't if somebody lops your balls off for being a stoner/alcoholic. I don't think kids should be exposed to that sort of behavior, but I just can't condone neutering another human being.
mintstashinurtea 5
who said they did it in front of thr kids?
BeThePanda 1
You're assuming that anyone who uses weed is going to be constantly high. That assumption is dead wrong. I know parents who not only smoke weed recreationally, but also run a multimillion dollar business and have raised two very respectful, intelligent children. So don't assume that anyone who uses weed is a "dirty druggie" as you call it.
LordOfLincoln 6
Weed is an illegal substance. Anyone who uses it recreationally or otherwise is a dirty filthy bastard druggie and doesn't deserve to live with the rest of society. There is no excuse.
PrincessPesa 20
Lord of Lincoln, please shut the **** UP. You have no idea what you're on about. You're like the Hitler of marijuana. First of all, it is no longer illegal everywhere! Sorry to burst your sad little crap-filled bubble. Anger and stupidity like yours are what ruin societies, not people getting a bit high on something notorious for making one mellow.
perdix 31
Forget about irony, focus on revenge. Go to your local police station and inquire about the Junior Nark Program, a program for brown-nosing, fascist buzzkills who want to betray their own family. Then, you can snitch on your own parents, you lily-livered, backstabbing Benedict Arnold!
flashback.miss 28
How old are you anyway, OP? Well, if it was an purely an accidental coincidence that you came across then I cant really say YDI, but if you were actively trying to find drugs then yes, YDI.
FMLandurstoo 9
Why would you search for drugs in your own house?
the_true_batman 10
That's what you get for smoking their stash! Forgot to mention that part, didn't you?
citymayer 7
I guess 16 needs to go find the definition of irony.
radwanov 14
what's even more ironic is that some people say that you deserve it :P. sorry OP but we don't choose our families
actingnut 3
hahahahahaha I'm sorry but that's hilarious. I'd love to be in ur position right now lol
Stark62392 1
I can only imagine lol
trollingsforfags 0
70- some of that is complete crap, at least the parts about brain cells and cancer. Brain cells and nerve cells don't grow back, ever. Also, marijuana can give you cancer, if you smoke it, as it still hurts lung function if you aren't breathing oxygen.
horneyhic 15
It doesn't kill brain cells that's alcohol it simply rewires them for a short time and studies have shown that smoking weed alone does not cause a measureable difference in cancer rates
PresAgent 23
False, brain cells do grow back. http://biology.about.com/od/Brain/p/Regeneration-Of-Brain-Cells.htm You're welcome.
PrincessPesa 20
Also, I have to say- the air we breathe is hardly pure oxygen. Smog is probably more harmful to us and we take it in constantly.
WildInTheStreets 5
I think 79 is trying to troll.
horneyhic 15
Pure sea level air is 21.5% oxygen
Smurff95 0
It can't give you cancer. If it gave you cancer, it wouldn't be given to people to help with cancer. Dumbass. And it can't kill you either. It's been proven.
trollingsforfags 0
70- Also, of course crime rates would go down, as there is no crime being commited. What is said withstanding, I believe people should be allowed to do whatever they want with their bodies, such as using drugs.