Today, my parents finally got married. At the after-party, my mother got drunk and informed me that even though she and my father were now married, it doesn't change the fact that I'm still a bastard. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my mother got remarried. I am now officially older than my step-father. FML
Victoria?
Today, I got married and my mom refused to be there because my dad, whose guts she hates, was there even though I promised repeatedly that I would keep them apart. I couldn't do the mother-son dance. She keeps insisting that it was a "lapse in judgment." Yeah, like we're really going to be able to have a do-over. FML
Today, I got married. After the ceremony, my sister asked to talk to me. I followed her and she told me that we are no longer related because we don't have the same last name anymore. FML
How very dare you?
Today, my drunken mother told me I'm just like my father and that I don't give a fuck about her. She's living in my home and drinking my wine. FML
Today, I got married. When my father gave me away, in front of hundreds of people, to my groom, he said, "She's your problem now." FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML
Family man
Today, my parents disowned me because I threw out my wife and son after I found out that the kid wasn't mine. According to them, I'm a "heartless asshole." FML
Family Matters
Today, I found out I will always come in second to my new husband's alcoholic parents. FML
Today, I found out why my dad always treated me badly as a kid compared to my siblings. It's because I was conceived while my mom was cheating on him. On top of that, he made it clear that he still doesn't consider me a "real" part of the family. FML
Today, I happily told my parents that my boyfriend proposed to me last night. My dad's response? "Marry that goofy bastard and you're out of the will." FML
Top comments
Bakarra 22
From a fellow bastard, you are not alone OP, you are not alone.
Marmarfarfar 25
Well technically it doesn't. Not your fault OP.
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Comments (77)
livewire1701 8
You should have countered with I wouldn't be a bastard if you hadn't been a ***** first.
katersmaria 14
Having sex and/or a child outside of wedlock does not make the mother a *****.
lambda_fml 40
No. It was DocB. ;-)
Acik91 26
You could always join a Night Watch.
AChipmunk 2
Night gathers, and now my watch begins.
AChipmunk 2
Dammit I think I forgot a line
RuskiManBearPig 4
I was wandering when the game of thrones references would come
unixdude 9
You know nothing, Jon Snow.
01Ben21 10
Oh well man, keep your head up!
Meme1988 18
At least they finally got married after all these years ( you are old enough to write a FML)
stevothedevo 25
At least being a bastard isn't your fault. Being a bitch is hers..
ciaraohagan94 5
Hey I'm a bastard too except I was happy that way and wish my parents hadn't gotten married.
JadeWinter 16
I'm a bastard too! It's ok, we'll slowly but surely dominate the world OP, so join us. Muahahhaa.
Jharrist89 12
That's when you should have said "and you're a ****" lol..
gracehi 33
At least they didn't get their marriage annulled, which would have changed you from a legitimate child born in wed-lock to a bastard.
gracehi 33
What the hell? *annulled
gracehi 33
Apparently, the "A" word is a no-no here on FML. Can anyone guess what it is?
chuckcloninger 12
Huh? What the hell is it you think you are saying?