Today, my new neighbor informed me with great relish that the house I have just bought is haunted because 30 years ago a man shot himself in the kitchen. I'm now paying a huge mortgage on a house I'm frightened to be alone in. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was painting my new house when my neighbor introduced himself. Mid-conversation, he said, "The lady who lived here was nice, but just couldn't get over her husband hanging himself in the garage. Or her son shooting himself in the basement." I'll never sleep again. FML
Today, I just bought my own house after divorcing my wife of 30 years. We'd been childless by her choice, and as I stood in my new living room, looking at the emptiness, I couldn’t help the feeling I just bought a 2-storey, £125,000 coffin that I’ll one day die alone and be buried in. FML
Today, I moved into my new apartment. My neighbor is apparently crazy and thinks I'm trying to 'steal' her husband. She watches me and is super paranoid. I have a two year lease. FML
Today, I moved into my new house. The previous occupants failed to tell me that they'd recently kicked out their crazy crackhead son, who seems to think they've paid me to pretend that they've moved out and that I'm the new owner. He wants back in. FML
Today, the great deal on my new apartment has turned into a nightmare. I keep hearing extremely weird sounds almost every night, and when I tried taking pics of the place today, my camera's face recognition feature kept activating, but only in my bedroom. I'm scared shitless. FML
Today, I found out that I bought a house next door to crazy people. She asked me if I would mind not showering when her husband is at home, because he can hear me and knowing I’m naked on the other side of the wall turns him on, which is a nuisance for her. He’s unemployed. He’s always at home, the creep. FML
Today, less than a day after my cranky downstairs neighbor passed away, I woke up to banging sounds against his apartment ceiling, like the ones he used to make whenever I walked around during the night. I'm shitting myself in fear. FML
Today, I’d been dying to escape my dreary hometown, but had panic attacks at the thought of being on my own, but at last, I'd found a place I could afford. Turns out, the guy I was going to rent from was just arrested for murdering his last tenant. FML
Today, I had to spend a depressingly long time convincing my 29-year-old husband that our house isn't haunted and that the door slammed shut because it was windy outside. I repeat, "29-year-old husband" and "haunted". It's like I'm married to a child. FML
Today, a haunted house opened up next to my restaurant and they've gotten into the habit of scaring me as I'm cleaning up at night. They stay open for another month. FML
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Top comments
letiflor 3
lol just get the house blessed 0:)
orangeduck 6
If food began to dance in the air then I would be scared.
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Comments (114)
wriptidez 0
what a cow neighbor
pinkredneck30 2
ask you real-estate agent. most states have a disclosure policy where they have to inform you of any deaths or crimes that has been committed in that house. and no need to worry about ghost or anything like that. most of the time when people get scared it's really just their own mind creating it. causing your own fear and making every noise seem supernatural. over 90% of house hold noises and disturbances can be explained by simple reasoning and science. one door slammed shut on it's own!!! houses create a vacuum so when one is opened another pulls closed.
starry71 0
Oh, get over it! If there are ghosts in there just call a priest and have the house blessed and encircle the house with salt. Tell him to go to the light and you'll be fine. Unless you seriously believe in that crap.
drakesylvan 6
First off, everyone has died in almost every house that you would buy, whether it be from suicide or from just play old age. Don't think your house is special, and get a therapist for your anxiety and paranoia, your house is fine, there's nothing wrong with it.
MamaKate 0
I guess they have laws about sellers requiring to disclose if a house is haunted (or even thought to be). You can totally petition for the value of the home to be reviewed
unusual_girl 3
Keep salt and something made of iron with you at all times XD Nah, but seriously, I don't think you should worry about that too much. Just because somebody died there, doesn't mean it's haunted
jrang_14 2
I would love to live in that house. you're a pussy.
Crazy_mexi 0
suck it up, ghosts don't exist you baby. la de da If some sphyco killed himself 30 years ago. that's means absolutely nothing today.
payybabe 0
You definitely wouldn't be alone!
Gerrito 0
Seriously? Come on seriously? Get your head out odd your arse