Today, my new boyfriend was at my flat for the first time. He picked up something in the bathroom and said 'What the hell's this?'. I told him what it was for, and he said 'You girls and your weird female products. Who needs all this stuff?'. It wasn't a female thing. It was shampoo. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I found out the crappy shampoo I've been borrowing from my girlfriend is actually "feminine wash." FML
Junk in the trunk
Today, I noticed that my very expensive facial cleanser was almost out. I had moved in with my boyfriend recently, and questioned him, telling him "You don't have to use so much to wash your face. That's a $70 bottle." To which he responded, "Oh, that nice-smelling stuff? Yeah, I use that on my junk." FML
Today, my ex dropped by to pick up a piece of art he'd left when I threw him out a month ago. While here, he visited the restroom. Tonight, my shampoo smelled like urine. And he called at 11pm to say he'd ''rubbed one out'' on my new boyfriend's toothbrush. FML
Full blast
Today, I got a text from my boyfriend whilst on the train home from spending the weekend with him at his grandparents' house. It said, "Gran says to tell you that the bin beside the toilet is actually for storing spare shampoos and toothbrushes, so could you not put your tampons in it next time?" FML
Newbie
Today, I was about to leave for my honeymoon with my new husband, when he saw my deodorant in my bag. He picked it up and asked what it was. When I said it was deodorant, he gave me a confused look and said, "Girls don't wear deodorant." He actually believed that. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend sleep over at my house for the first time. Upon arriving, he tossed his stuff on the floor and said "I gotta take a piss, where's your shower?" FML
Firehose
Today, I found out that my boyfriend pees in the shower. This would've been OK if he was peeing into the drain. Instead, he pees on the shampoo and soap bottles. FML
Mr Clean
Today, I discovered my new boyfriend doesn’t have toilet paper. He has a toilet cloth, which he instructed me to rinse off in the toilet after I was done. FML
The ick
Today, I found out that the reason I gave a girl "the ick" was something she saw in my bathroom. Was it a filthy sink, a massive skid mark, or some kind of bizarre sex toy? No, I use those blue toilet cleaner tablets and apparently that means I'm a "prissy princess". FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Top comments
QuantumLegend 0
Shampoo? We don't use shampoo, we use MANpoo.
rockr_chick 5
lol manpoo sounds like another name for shit.
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Comments (137)
seraphxchild 3
alot of guys just wash thier hair with soap O_o
brianjman14 23
Get in the shower and show him how to use it, then suck his dick.
underpaid011 0
wow, the British are so much more sophisticated than Americans! men there don't know what shampoo or a toothbrush is for!
i_like_girls 0
damn....51 you just got struck.
Ratdaddy94 0
Brits apparently don't know that you never start a sentence with the word "and", capitalized or not.
5t3ff1k4h 47
*snickers* Owned, son.
moogiex9 6
Pendatik, I think I love you!
Impulseforyou 6
ah ha! Agreed! :D
silvic84 0
is your boyfriend Tarzan!????
JLY_fml 0
he's a dirty boy lol
hellosir23 0
they put shampoo in hydrogen bombs, did u know that?
Bekll 31
Reminds me of one of my guy friends who didn't know that to wash dishes you need hot water and soap.
i_luv_u3030 3
well maybe it's the expensive name brand stuff for "thick" hair or "frizzy" hair he might just use generic shampoo
cptmorgan15 2
I'm pretty sure there are some missing details in this fml.
Gingerkid123 0
Maybe he was just jokin