Today, my neighborhood had its annual summer barbecue, and I ended up showing a little boy who lives down the street how to hit a baseball. When I gave him back his bat so he could try for himself, he swung it into my shin and yelled, "Tag! You're it!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was jogging in my neighborhood when I saw a kid's ball roll over to where I was jogging. I stopped, grabbed the ball for the kid and went to hand it to him. He then yelled, "Stranger danger!" and his parents came sprinting out. I had to explain the story to the police for 30 minutes. FML
Today, I was babysitting my neighbor's kid. We were playing in the yard, when he fell and got a small scratch on his leg. I gasp, and he takes a huge breath in and yells, "FUUUCK!!!" as loud as possible. The parents thought it was me, and the mother slapped me in the face. FML
Today, I went to an amateur baseball game with some family and friends. When our team hit a home run, my grandpa took it upon himself to start screaming wildly, removing his prosthetic leg and waving it jubilantly in the air. FML
Today, I was playing tennis with my friend. He hit a ball up high, and I slammed it down, thinking there was no way he would get it. Feeling pretty good about it, I turned around to celebrate. As I turned around, I got smacked in my face. He got it. FML
Today, I was walking around in a park when I passed some kids playing soccer. One of them kicked the ball as hard as he could at me. Luckily, I caught the ball, then I drop-kicked it, intending to say, "Go get it." Instead, it bounced off a nearby tree and hit me in the face. FML
Today, while walking through the park, a little boy came running up to me and hit me in the nuts with a stick. I fell on the ground and looked up just in time to see his mom giving him the thumbs up with a smile on her face. FML
Today, I volunteered to help out at an elementary school. I accidentally elbowed a little girl in the face while playing tag. And an hour later, a little boy flew out of his swing because I accidentally pushed him too hard. They're both siblings and are my child psychology instructor's kids. FML
Today, my little brother came into my room and hit me over the head with his baseball bat. He then dropped the bat onto my floor and ran crying into my mother's room proclaiming I stole his bat and beat him with it for fun. FML
Today, I was in the park for a walk when a ball rolled to my feet. Figuring it belonged to the kids not far off, I wound back and kicked. The ball had actually been kicked by someone else for their dog to chase and I ended up punting it in the head. FML
Today, I found myself arguing with a 6-year-old over a game of tag. FML
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Top comments
Forlorn420 9
Did you tag him back??
failureusername 12
That's when you throw your shoe at his face and yell "NO TAG BACKS!" D:
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Comments (75)
jtn143lmb 4
First?
wannagofast 3
Well.....how was his form? Did he folloe through?
epic13 12
Follow*
wannagofast 3
Yeaaa....posting from a phone isn't exactly conducive to avoiding typos
leogirl95 12
iPhones are.
blade4080 7
iPhones are the spawn of satan.
efemel94 7
FML is the most bipolar site on the web! One moment all commenters are getting thumbed up for correcting grammar and spelling and the next time everyone turns against them! You cannot win D:
JFurr 9
When it's something like what you did, no one should be correcting you. Any intelligent person could see that you meant "follow", considering you had an "e". It's just one letter away on the keypad. It's good you reread it and saw it. Next time, do that before you hit send and no one would be any wiser. Either way, I'm glad no one jumped on you about it.
Inheritance 10
OP atleast he didn't say "keep your eye on the ball" and then proceeded with hitting you in the balls
baddawg365 0
49- It's also because he/she didn't try to douche their way out like most who get corrected
Death_Hoe_Inn 10
Follow**
blade4080 7
-68, honestly? Must you really succumb to the douchebagness in yourself? Typing on a phone using this app is incredibly frustrating. You mistype alot.
Death_Hoe_Inn 10
How would you know what I do?
KBeatz 5
And sadly your lesson will never be remembered by that boy. Oh well, time for BBQ!
mrfuzzywiggles 11
Well he could go by the kids lesson and hit him back.
jmk1469 5
Kids...
untamed112 0
I despise children
Forlorn420 9
Did you tag him back??
FlamingTacos 7
I would've tagged him back in the face
AlphaPrice 7
At least he was enthusiastic about playing
ant1078 7
He prolly recalled that one piñata party and thought u were gonna explode with candy.
bmkc4 1
Did it hurt?
t_raw1234 11
No it felt good
lonkite101 14
14- it did?
ydi_4_suking 20
It probably tickled
bmkc4 1
Ok I was being sarcastic
zachherbert 10
Then you forgot to turn on your sarcasm font.. Duh.
ManInTheMachine 20
I'm surrounded by idiots.
Arthurie 30
Welcome to this generation. Where the phones are smarter than the people!
Arthurie 30
Double post.
IdontWanna69 8
Kid's got a good tag strategy at least.
failureusername 12
That's when you throw your shoe at his face and yell "NO TAG BACKS!" D:
hockeyoceancity 13
You didn't spell boulder correct.
jkillz_it 7
or a brick....
brohamas16 7
That's when you push him down and run away yelling nooooo your it!
zachherbert 10
The kid has a bat in his hands.