Today, my neighbor scolded me for "allowing" her son to be bitten by one of my dogs. This would be reasonable, except for the fact that her kid had jumped my fence and tried to steal a rattle out of my daughter's hands. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I said no, she started crying so much that her mom came out 5 minutes later and demanded that I give her daughter the dog. FML
Today, I went to let my dog inside because she was barking. I saw my neighbour standing at my fence, screaming that she was going to kill my dog with a shovel for barking at her. My dog was only doing it because my neighbor was putting her trash in my garbage bin. This isn't a new thing. FML
Today, my neighbor yelled at me because her two kids got into my pool. They scaled a two-meter wall to get to my backyard. They used a tree in her yard that hangs over the wall. I guess I could install razor wire on top of the wall. FML
Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML
Today, I was screaming at my neighbor to shut his dog up. After 30 minutes of bellowing, he yelled back that it was my dog that was barking. He was right. FML
Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML
Today, I entered my neighbors’ yard around a shorter corner than usual. Their old dog is getting a bit slow, but unfortunately only in her head: By the time she recognized me as harmless, she had already run up and bitten me. FML
Today, my mom got mad at me. She told me that the neighbor was stupid for letting their kids play all over the street alone. I said it was fine, because the mom walked right next to the daughter as she played on her scooter. She argued, “Why do you always have to disagree with me?” FML
Today, as I was walking my dog, some self-righteous animal activist berated me on how it was animal abuse to put my dog on a leash. Despite warning her, she crouched down to undo it, my dog charged at her, giving her a gash on the cheek. She kicked my dog for it, and is now threatening to sue me. FML
Today, I got caught trying to steal my own cat back from my neighbor. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
bellles 18
Where do people's common sense go?
Khorlik 6
You should "let" your dog bite her.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (146)
bellles 18
Where do people's common sense go?
noobsatin 19
I'm pretty sure they forget it in their sock drawer.
KK3137 31
Common sense is not so common..
Dontalktome 9
Common sense is rare nowadays, it should be classified as a superpower.
nix1993 41
This happened to my friend who lived opposite us. The kid next door who was about 11 removed a vertical fence panel and snuck into their garden and started sneaking her 6 year old brothers toys back through before being caught by her brother. Bully #1 then pushed him over and wrestled the soccer ball out of his hands. At which point their puppy ran over and stood between the two barking at the neighbour kid, when that kid then tried to pick up the soccer ball again and bugger off with it the dog bit his wrist, but didn't break skin. Next thing we see the kids mom go screaming round to their front door with the police in tow saying that the puppy got into THEIR yard through the fence and bit her kid unprovoked. Unfortunately for Bully #2 it became clear that the dog couldn't have put the fence panel in her sons tree house, along with all my friends brothers toys, and the dog didn't put the handprint bruise round his arm when her charming son took the ball off him. The police basically said they thought the puppy was more likely to tell them the truth than her son and told her to give all the stuff back or she'd be arrested. I think it helped to convince them that the dog couldn't really sneak into anyones garden when they went into my friends house to see the dog and watched him repeatedly try to walk through their closed patio door.
cryssycakesx3 23
^^ I had a hard time following that story with all the "he, him, them"
xNotCreative 13
If it's rare, it's not common sense.
avapaige1234 19
I even wonder why they call it common when it's not "common". The English dictionary needs a reformation.
falon142012 22
98, probably because it used to be and is still supposed to be common.
thedudeguy1 16
What you haven't heard? It's called uncommon sense now.
dubleduke 11
Over the fence obviously
Khorlik 6
You should "let" your dog bite her.
mb2_native 15
I'm pretty it is, especially when he tried to steal from someone whom the dog protects with their life. I'm glad no one tried that at my home.. I have a King Shepherd and he's huge, paws the size of my hand since he was a pup.. Can be stinky because of his long fur tho, hard to bathe a dog like that haha
clrichmond2009 24
Aren't they required to have a beware of dog sign though? not sure how it works where they live, was just always advised to have one with my dogs.
Lil_Red777 21
#48 how do you know they didn't? The little brat clearly doesn't care about things like fences or stealing. So why would a sign make him stop.
cryssycakesx3 23
no, a sign won't make him stop. they do, however, protect the homeowner from any sort of liability.
cryssycakesx3 23
didn't a burglar sue because he got bit by the homeowner's dog, and win?
blondeambition1 4
Actually depending where you live, a beware of dog sign could make you more liable. It proves you know your dog could be viscous.
mikbrooke 25
#48 considering the kid jumped the fence, do you think having a beware of dog sign would have been useful? those type of signs are generally put up at the front of the house or on the front fence/gate.
clrichmond2009 24
I just meant for the legality/liability purpose. No way the kid would actually care.
TunaFireStarter 16
Unfortunately a guy I know had to have his dog put down after a teenager hopped his fence and the dog bit his ankle. It was sad because the dog was the biggest sweetheart except for this one incident, in which the dog was doing exactly what it should have! Scare off the intruder without being excessively aggressive. The kid even admitted to not leaving when the dog started barking at him. :(
fader48080 10
sadly yes there was also a successful suit against a home owner when a burglar fell though a roof and landed on a kitchen knife. This is what happens when we stop voting for statesman and patriots. and start voting for people because they have an R or a D at the end of their name.
Andicc 19
Unfortunately that's not the way the law always sees it. My ex husband, when he still lived with his parents, was asleep on his moms couch. Next thing he knew, someone was banging on the door. (This was the middle of the night) He cracked the door to see his drunk uncle (who is 3 times his size) and his girlfriend (who wasn't exactly a petite woman). His uncle tried to force his way in with the intent of robbing his house and knocked him backwards with the door. My ex then shoved him outside as hard as he could, and in the meantime, his boxer ran outside too. His uncle then punched him and knocked him out, while he was unconscious, his uncles girlfriend jumped on top of him and began beating him. The dog then attacked her, biting her on the ass and drawing blood. Neither his uncle nor his girlfriend got in any trouble...because my ex did not want to press charges (he should have!) but the girlfriend went and told authorities about the dog bite. The dog was then quarantined for a period and placed on doggie house arrest. (Could not leave the house with out a leash even in their own yard) and my exs parents were fined. Poor dog was only protecting his family ):
spoo 24
If i put up a beware of dog sign, it would resolve the need to have a dog in the first place :o. Some might rather punishment over deterrence.
meganwallace 3
in the UK, it's not legal :/ we have an akita x Rottweiler, and he barks when people loiter at our gate, and though he's.never shown aggression, I wouldn't put it past him if someone unwanted came.into our.property. in the UK though any reported dog bite is investigated individually, regardless of situation or breed and the dog is assessed for behaviour. in regards to having a sign, in the UK it makes no odds: doesn't protect you, nor does it make you liable.
Welshite 40
That woman is stupid. Your dog was defending his family member.
jeezburger12 10
Unfortunately we can't always avoid stupidity.
harrypotter955 19
I would enjoy seeing this kid getting smacked
ThrillJunkie 15
I'd enjoy seeing the woman who did the scolding get smacked too!
91hayek 31
Face fives for everybody!!!!
Brandi_Faith 34
I wish parents would discipline their kids! And yes, I think spanking is appropriate (when used correctly) and unfortunately most kids need it as they don't respond to time outs. It blows my mind that parents think they don't have to discipline their kids and they won't turn out to be monsters!
oreyoes 15
Wait what? A rattle? This boy..
dj998877 6
Common sense is a rare thing nowadays.
ihunter_rae 12
I'm sorry, I didn't know a good protective dog isn't allowed to do anything when an unknown being crosses into "his" territory while ALSO trying to take a little kids toy....stupid people, I swear.
cryssycakesx3 23
haha I actually don't have anything to say about this Ms Rae. I completely agree.
Vegetarian27 24
Exactly. You have nothing to say.
Catkam623 27
You're neighbors are assholes...
MrDonSalvetti 27
Must avoid to correct... Have to hold in... the Grammat Nazi in me... *Your Damn I lost again! -.-
clrichmond2009 24
At least he was *trying* to be correct! Though he failed miserably.
anticulas 12
Grammat Nazi... Grammar, haha
91hayek 31
Why is their a Nazi in you? Why is his name Grammat? Why are you holding him in?
PaigeLeeAnn11 23
The little shit deserved to be bitten. You don't owe her an apology, OP.
brenton490 19
I say he got lucky my mom always says to put sticks of dynamite with a padlock in little ***** mail boxes...
cryssycakesx3 23
he was being an asshole for sure, but I don't think little kids *deserve* to be bitten by a dog. you ever get bit? shit hurts.
JCRouzer29 27
When a kid is being a little shit like that of course they deserve some form of punishment. It's a method of learning and by the sound of the protective mother he isn't held responsible enough for his own actions. And yes I've been bitten by each dog my family has owned at least once. From Jack Russell terrier to a few Great Danes.
RedPillSucks 33
Well, if the kid is in the process of trespassing and stealing, then bite away, I say...