Today, my mother got me to guess who she spent the night with. I then find out it was the gas station guy. The same creep that I've been complaining about because he hits on me every time I go get gas. Good pick Mom. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML
Today, I found out that my mother cheated on my father. It turns out she had a drunken one night stand with the manager of the restaurant that my parents own, and where I work. The same manager I have been secretly sleeping with for over six months. FML
Today, I discovered that the reason my mom hasn't been noticing the extra cleaning I've done lately is because her boyfriend took credit when she asked about it; and was rewarded for it in bed. I helped him get with my mom. FML
Today, while I was waiting at the bus stop, a car that looked like my mom's pulled up. Thinking it was actually her, I walked up and jokingly asked what she was into. The guy inside now thinks that I'm a prostitute. FML
Today, I found out that the guy I've been sleeping with is my mom's gynecologist. FML
Today, I found out my stalker is my mom's new boyfriend. FML
Today, I stopped by the gas station. As I was filling up I noticed a cute guy at the pump next to me. When I was done, I gave him a wink before opening my car door. It was locked. I had to call my Dad to bring my spare keys. The guy was laughing the whole time as I waited for my Dad to show up. FML
Today, I was at the mall with some friends. In the food court we passed by this creepy pervert feeling up a woman. I take a closer look and realize with horror that the guy is my dad in sunglasses and a hat. The lady he was with was not my mom. FML
Today, I discovered that the "hot, slutty, woman" my roommate has been dating is my mom. FML
Today, my mom took me to dinner. She told me about an argument that she and her boyfriend had, and she showed me the texts. While reading, I learned that she smells his dick before sucking it. FML
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Top comments
Doortje 30
Free gas?
LemonStarship 5
He's trying to get closer to you. And he's succeeding.
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Comments (53)
ScaryyMary 14
Sounds like the gas station offers full service?
sweet_candy_ 17
If you didn't like the creep staring at you then why would you still go get gas there?
Crystiella 0
Wow, you're exactly right. How about we all go to gas stations that are inconvient and waste gas just to get there because we don't like someone who works there. Sounds fun.
Crystiella 0
Wow, you're exactly right. How about we all go to gas stations that are inconvient and waste gas just to get there because we don't like someone who works at the other place. Sounds rational.**
deputy_g 5
maybe she's just small town girl living in a lonely world..who took her car to the only gas station in her town
ScaryyMary 14
He's just a small town boy born and raised in south Detroit, working at a gas station to afford his ticket to the midnight train.
Withired_Away 0
win.
5up3rTAN 0
it's funny because your mom's a slag
ScaryyMary 14
It's funny because that joke is dead.
Suchagoonnn 4
its *not* funny because the joke is dead •Tha Goon•
ScaryyMary 14
It's funny because 17 thinks s/he is funny.
ilovesexywomen 0
threeeeeesomeeee
sourgirl101 29
Did she like the way he handles his nozzle? Quick question, why are you playing the guessing game with your mom? That's creepier than that guy, I would say.
doublewide420 0
Don't talk about him like that, he may be your father one day.
sallen0046 4
Is there only one gas station where you live? Did you ever think that maybe he wasn't hitting on you, but was in fact just trying to be friendly because he had a thing for your mom? Everything doesn't have to be specifically about you.
sourgirl101 29
or maybe he settled for the mom because he couldn't get the daughter?
jhb33 4
Don't give yourself too much credit OP haha
djw287 0
This is likely your own fault for complaining, she must have thought "if he's desperate enough to hit on my daughter he'll probly do anything"
sourgirl101 29
Why would he be considered "desperate" for hitting on the daughter? It happens all the time. The OP is probably an adult child since she seems to own her own car. (unless she's a lucky sweet sixteen girl) If anything, it's the mom that seems desperate.
Stupidpeopleanno 5
The gas station mans offer: Free gas for a roll in the hay?