Today, my mother continued her lifelong habit of talking to anyone who isn't white in extremely slow, exaggerated "caveman" English. She insists that she isn't being racist, but rather is helping. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had no idea my mom was low key racist until I told her I was dating a black woman, and she told me that was fine, just as long as I didn’t do something silly like fall in love with her or let her distract me from finding a proper wife. Wow mom, just wow. FML
Today, my mother went on another long rant, detailing 20 years of bad things that we all already knew about a relative. The slightest recollection in a conversation never fails to turn into unending monologues. I can't change the past, nor the subject of conversation apparently. FML
Today, I caught my mom in the back row of one of my lectures, so I confronted her. Apparently she’s been doing this all year to make sure I’m paying attention in class and not making friends with the "wrong sort of people" (yes, she's a racist as well). I can't wait to move out of her house. FML
Today, my mother once again interrupted me and talked over me, as though I wasn't saying anything at all. Then she wondered why I remained quiet after she was done talking about her mother doing that. Must run in the family. FML
Today, I had to explain to my white girlfriend that dating me doesn't give her the right to call my mother the N-word. FML
Today, my mother yet again went on a long rant about how much of a loser I am as I have "never had boyfriend" and I'm 26. Truth is, I've been in the same relationship for over five years but it "doesn't count because he's black." FML
Today, I was stuck on a campus tour with my subtly racist mother who, in an attempt to seem open-minded, deemed it appropriate to refer to our black tour guide as "Sistah". FML
Today, I overheard my caucasian mother on the phone lamenting to a friend that her future grandchildren won’t “look American”. Any future grandchildren of hers would be half Lakota native. FML
Today, I had to slowly and very seriously explain to my mother why there is no 'White History Month'. I can't believe we are actually related. FML
Today, my mom scolded me for ruining my sister's "vacation" here. She just got deported from abroad, and was only gone for 2 months after falling for a marriage scam. Now she deludes to herself that she was born and raised there, and claims not to understand our mother tongue, calling it third world primate language. FML
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Top comments
Trupe 3
Black guy no like racist mommy. Very offensive
gabbster95 0
maybe you should start talking to her like a caveman and see how much she likes it....
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Comments (102)
Shorty_xD 0
FYL for havin a racist ass mother!
rebbee 0
Your mother sounds like an ignorant bit of shit. FYL for being raised by something as incredibly narrow minded as her.
turtlemanz 8
I say we chop off a hand for wing racist and if it continues an arm :)
5t3ff1k4h 47
Ignorant mother. Heh, what's her reaction going to be when someone does the same thing back to her?
Freeze_fml 17
How does she make it through Wal-Mart?
DncrHap 9
hahaha. that was awful.
becca77713 0
That's horrible : (
EinSteinFYL 0
OP's mom has had sex with men of different races and they all said, "Hurr durr, ah, mmm, ohhh..."
Guillory24 0
shes very ignorant for doing that!!!...shes ininuating that those of other color are slow...so she feels the need to speak slowly to them when u never know they could be a whole lot smarter than she'll ever be...i would cuss her out if i ever came across her or anyone as ignorant as her
5t3ff1k4h 47
OP, your mother is helping. Helping to prove the world is a very ignorant place.
ftb170 0
hahaha that's pretty funny. especially because whiteys normally act soo superior lol. but I'm not saying everyone does so that shouldn't apply to the nice ones.
Freeze_fml 17
Yeah, because all blackies rap and are sooo annoying. I'm not saying everyone does that so it shouldn't apply to the smart ones. Screw you.
Jsalcedo23 0
I'm really offended. I'm mexican
GodinezXC 0
do u work at a high school by the name of godinez?