Today, my little sister came home crying because someone had shown her a video about the Slender Man. Trying to calm her down, I explained to her that he wasn't real, just like Santa Claus. She looked up at me and said "Santa's not real?" It's been 3 hours, and she hasn't stopped crying. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at lunch with my mom and we were talking about how to tell my brother that Santa Claus isn't real. After we finished our conversation, I heard someone crying. Little did I know, two little kids and their parents were sitting in the booth behind me. FML
Today, my 8-year-old came home from school crying. Apparently her teacher told the whole class to write about how they felt when they learned that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy weren't real. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were talking with his sister-in-law about a TV show, his 6-year-old nephew walked up just in time to hear how Santa killed the protagonist's parents. I've never seen such a heartbroken face in my life, and now he won't stop asking if Santa kills people. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my friend, when my four year old nephew came in, asking who I was talking to. I told him it was Santa Claus, so he insisted on talking to him. I handed over the phone and I hear, "Santa is fake. Grow up." I spent the next two hours with a screaming child proving Santa exists. FML
Today, my daughter told my son that Santa is not real. Of course, being a child, he started to cry. My only problem is, my son is 11 and my daughter is 6. FML
Today, my fifteen year-old son decided to tell his little five year-old sister that Santa isn't real. She now refuses to talk to any of us and thinks "her whole life is a lie". FML
Today, my daughter ran up to an old man with a white beard and a red sweater because she thought he might be Santa. He was a homeless dude, drunk at 9 in the morning. He told her to either give him money or f**k off, then screamed at her that "Santa’s not real, grow up r*tard." She’s still crying FML
Today, I went to a Christmas-themed amusement park with my 21-year-old autistic sister who adores Christmas. She took her picture with Santa and started crying happy tears. Then Santa asked her loudly, "Aren't you beyond old enough to know I'm not real?" Vacation ruined. FML
Today, my older sister forced me to tell my nephews, 8 and 6, that Santa Claus does not exist, because she was recently fired from her job and is too much of a coward to tell them she will no longer give them any Christmas gifts for the foreseeable future. FML
Today, I took my 5-year old daughter to get a photo taken with Santa, when she asked the dreaded question of why this Santa looked different from one at the other store. Before I could placate her, some cunt of a kid yelled, "Because he's not real, dumbass!" FML
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Top comments
SarcasticUnicorn 9
You monster!
DocBastard 40
Oh great. First she gets the shit scared out of her, and then you ruin her childhood. Why don't you just tell her there's no Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy and get it over with.
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Comments (164)
SarcasticUnicorn 9
You monster!
Psych101 9
OP clearly thinks so too, look at her user name.
SCUBA_Diiver 3
Wait? Santa's not real? What?!
paolayupp 6
73- have you ever watched Supernatural?? Monsters are real!
Goldenchest 14
Show her LilyPichu's "Slendy's Lullaby" :)
guy24 9
She might as well tell her the truth about Gods too.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
"Unicorns are real though! Unfortunately, they're sold on the black market for food, clothing, decorations--" *more crying* "...****."
Sir_Crackerjacks 5
124- Of coarse unicorns are real, there just fat, gray, and nicknamed rhinos :D
xXHollowIchigoXx 17
Lol at people thumbing up and talking about unicorns but no one bothers to say anything about #119's comment.
Laurenlou 24
I honestly think lying to ones kids about some magical man who can go around the world in one night is horrific and monster like. Santa isn't God. (weather you believe in God or not.) And this is my 100th comment. Yay! :D
guy24 9
Seems like some people, like this little girl. Are upset that the magic man is not real.
Angelastic_fml 18
If you want your sense of wonderment back, try reading some well-written popular science books. :)
mduffy08 8
146 - because anyone who debates about god always brings the argument to a stalemate. Both sides never prove the existence, but one puts morals and faith into an account. Though, from personal experience, I believe.
guy24 9
So I have to give evidence that God does not exist? I know unicorns are not real, but that is because people who claim there are cannot prove it. It just makes them feel better to think they are real. For some reason God is the most appealing. Maybe because it is a illusion of knowledge. Dont know something? God did it.
FMLouis 6
You don't talk about "him" because if you do... Slender Mans comin to getcha!
Darkme 1
u did earn it a bit but 3 hours wow
wyattshack 4
What?
domking1315 20
Translation: You did deserve it a bit. But wow, 3 hours
wallandpiece 16
2 - Did you put that sentence through a blender?
Shadomasta 5
or.... Translation: You did earn it a bit, but 3 hours? Wow!
tne201992 12
Good Lord. That sentence was butchered!
Ninja_assassinXD 8
Slender man is some scary shit, especially at night. *Shudder*
missamazinggg 12
What is Slenderman? I'm too scared to find out myself.
smeet 3
You don't want to know... It is really creepy.
p3mguin 7
All slendy wants is a hug. Don't run away, turn around, walk to him, and give him an affectionate hug!
kittytub 12
slenderman is the reason I have to sleep facing the door at night now. -meow.-
xXUND3ADcityXx 0
Just play the game and find out, you should be too scared though I almost shit myself playing
Sir_Crackerjacks 5
54- he's a tall guy in a business without a face that STEALS THE SOULS OF CHILDREN!!! That escalated quickly didn't it?
p3mguin 7
Exactly Noor, you got the message. I didn't want slender man to know, NOW HE DOES EVERYONE RUN
lucy_hewitt15 6
Santa Claus IS REAL!!
gc327072 31
Hell yea!! He's at the mall every Christmas!! I wonder how he visits all of them??? 0_o
vocaloidtiger 12
Santa Claus is a creepy-ass, fat stalker. "He sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake". You'd better watch out.
JayChuckles 4
I'm tempted to Google slender man.
SarcasticUnicorn 9
Go to YouTube and type in marble hornets.
BeforeItWasCool 12
Google away. The original post from SA forums is still up I think. You'll soon find just how fake Slendy is, but he's a fun character.
brenkite 5
My favorite is the blog "just another fool".
BeforeItWasCool 12
Agree with 70, it's great.
SCUBA_Diiver 3
Do it. But not now, do it at 2:30 a.m, while you're drunk off your ass.
GothicAngel17 24
I did it last night and didn't sleep. Don't do it!
sweetpea5196 4
My brother made me play the game slender :o I'm still scared at night..
leogirl95 12
Wow, you deserved that one.
SonOfAMitch 14
There's a button for that.
leogirl95 12
Sometimes it's so bad that the button needs to be pushed and it needs to be said.
myalleyway 9
It's this really tall white guy with no face that preys on children that fear him. He mostly hangs in the woods, but will leave them to find you. Also, if you see him in the background of a picture you took, he'll come for you.
DocBastard 40
Oh great. First she gets the shit scared out of her, and then you ruin her childhood. Why don't you just tell her there's no Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy and get it over with.
TBelle4Ever 15
Doc, you forgot to mention unicorns and leprechauns!
SarcasticUnicorn 9
Hey! Unicorns ARE real.
starile 20
Tooth Fairy's real. I got money for putting teeth under my pillow, and my fobby-ass parents don't know anything about that myth/tradition. Tooth Fairy also seems so like candy; I once went to sleep intending to save a piece of gum for myself in the morning by putting it under my pillow, and I found a dollar in its place. No gum to be found. Kinda pissed me off.
rs89 20
How?
white16sox 19
78, you are extremely gullible if you believe your parents don't know about the tooth fairy.
M3LAKNEE 3
How do you not know that you little sitter still believed in Santa Claus? It's like a family thing to know that!
Peacelove0404 26
Santa's not real?!?! :O