Today, my husband and I were in bed when the alarm on his phone went off. He then told me that he had to 'sound the horn' and went over to his laptop. Wondering what that meant, I peered over at his laptop. It turns out hunting for mice on Facebook is more important than procreating. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Never look at the DMs
Today, I went onto my fiance's phone because I was seeing if a message was important enough go wake him up for. It wasn't important, but when I unlocked his phone, Facebook was already open with his female best friend's chat. He pretty much admitted to her that he still has feelings and that she's a better mom. FML
Today, at 3am, my boyfriend's phone notifications kept going off. I attempted to wake him up, but he didn't budge. When I went to silence it, I saw his Ashley Madison notification, followed by Tinder, Zoosk, and Plenty of Fish. We've been monogamous over a year... or so I thought. FML
Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML
I know that sound
Today, I was caught going on Facebook at work. I was called into my boss's office to be reprimanded, and while he was lecturing me on the importance of staying focussed and the misuse of company property, his computer beeped. It was his Facebook chat notifying him of a new message. FML
Workaholic
Today, on our honeymoon, I found out my husband brought his work laptop with him. We were supposed to go scuba diving but he skipped it for virtual meetings, then sat on his laptop until 2 a.m. He then had the nerve to be confused about why I’m mad at him and just want to go home. FML
Today, I found out my husband has a fake Facebook account that he uses to add guys and live a double life as some kind of "gamer chick". This would be disturbing enough, even if he hadn't used pictures of me to give a face to his alter ego. FML
Snoopy
Today, I thought it would be funny to go on my boyfriend's Facebook to change his status. While in the process, his account received a message. Turns out he's planning on hooking up with his ex-girlfriend/one of my friends and is definitely over me. How's that for snooping around? FML
Today, my husband and I were getting intimate when a notification for a game popped up on his iPad. He immediately shoved me aside so he could take care of his baby dragon. FML
Playing the odds
Today, I found out my husband sent 3000 friend requests to random women on Facebook. He says it's no big deal and doesn't mean anything. FML
Today, I found my boyfriend's Facebook page. I also found his wife's. FML
Top comments
Kmart91 0
QUICK! Shave your bristle like hair, and file down your tusks! You're boaring! But Yea, thats odd he rather do that....
Kitola 2
Dude, Mousehunt is awesome. At least my boyfriend understands that, and occasionally sounds the horn for me. :) If he's hunting for a map carrier, or the Acolyte, I totally can understand.
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Comments (91)
dmmd8686 0
kitola - the acolyte is killing me too. ydi for not realizing how epic MH is
TehMightyButters 0
Ok... Mousehunt is possibly the best thing to happen to facebook.....ever... i understand his reasoning for leaving bed to sound the horn completley.... YDI for not being aware of this amazing game
LStatus 0
what is the mousehunt?
_Noon_ 0
Yes, enlighten us, please.
mrsjill 0
http://apps.facebook.com/mousehunt/ That is the link. It is a fun game that you click your mouse on a horn and get cute (or not so cute) pictures of mice every 15 minutes. It is actually quite addicting.
mrsjill 0
Advice - from a female Mouse Hunter- My husband has noticed my addiction to this game- He now distracts me- in very interesting ways. Just try to be understanding. After all, he only needs to sound the horn once in an hour. It's not like he has to sit at the computer. My husband thoughtfully ask if I have finished my morning email etc... or just "drags" me away from the computer- in delightful ways.
jaybrown 0
I just tried playing that game MouseHunt. I can NOT get into it.
some_random_dude 0
wow... i just sounded the horn and read this.... MOUSEHUNT FTW!!!!!
beacher 0
Don't be sad my boyfriend plays warcraft from the time he wakes up at 7am till the next morning at 3am.. Consider yourself lucky.. Don't know why people can't just live IRL anymore.
nomadxx7 0
Try to give your boyfriend a BJ while he's playing WoW. If he doesn't enjoy it, dump his ass. I play WoW myself but usually only a few hours a day and usually at night (like 11 pm to 1 am). WoW doesn't do anything other than waste time and if he's wasting that much time it's either because he's an addict or a retard. Try to find the right answer and/or dump him
OneandOnlyOne 0
Perhaps he Might not be the right person to have a kid with. Wanna be a single parent? He won't help, he'll be too busy with Mousehunt on Facebook. Immature!
smokegrindsleep 0
It's not like we have a shortage of people. Don't be selfish. Adopt a child.
DutchGunner21 0
Don't let the singapore government see this, they might start banning apps! Edit: ON SECOND THOUGHT, send this into the Singapore government!
asamboy 3
That sucks. Never understood how people can be so damn addicted to those games.