Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up feeling a tingling sensation on my testicles....

fartypeepee 18 July 2009, 10:48 Australia 🌶️ Spicy

Today, I woke up feeling a tingling sensation on my testicles. I enjoyed it for a few seconds, then threw off the covers. Looks like there have been cockroaches in my bed. FML

137 comments

Collection

Fall

Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Same thing different taste

Whyis Dremora 30 September 2018, 22:00 San Marcos, United States

Today, I was abruptly woken by a scratching at my butthole that felt like a spider with a million legs. I've never leapt out of bed so fast. When my partner shined a light on the bed, we discovered it was a cockroach. FML

20 comments

shat 12 December 2015, 07:14 San Francisco, United States

YAAAAAAAAAAAASS

Today, I woke up to the feeling of something crawling up my leg. I threw back the bed sheets and saw it was a cockroach. My dad said my ensuing scream was so girlish that he wondered what the hell my sister was doing in my bedroom. FML

52 comments

jaqlove 2 July 2016, 20:28 Clementon, United States

Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML

32 comments

Anonymous 8 November 2021, 20:00 New Zealand

Night visitor

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to go pee. While in the bathroom, I felt something move inside my shirt but just ignored it, thinking it was my shirt brushing on something. Something moved again. I ripped my shirt off to reveal a massive cockroach inside my shirt. FML

5 comments

Anonymous 4 May 2020, 23:00

Fear factor

Today, at about 3:30 a.m. I awoke to the feeling of something dropping on my head. Startled, I turned on the light. It was a gigantic cockroach. I thought I'd killed it, but when I went to collect the body it was gone. I'm too scared to sleep. Even my dog now refuses to be in the bedroom. FML

5 comments

DisgustinglyFrustrated 10 October 2013, 15:40 Rosario, Argentina 🌶️ Spicy

Today, I was talking dirty to my long-distance lover while touching myself, when a cockroach fell from my ceiling and landed on the hand I was molesting myself with. FML

148 comments

no name 22 February 2011, 12:25

Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML

186 comments

GnarCarBar 12 September 2011, 23:03 United States

Today, I woke up to the feeling of someone tickling my back. I quickly realized I haven't been touched in so long that I was smiling to flies landing on me in my sleep. FML

75 comments

all5fingers 8 September 2011, 05:23 Canada

Today, I was playing my guitar and felt something like an itch under my foot, so I attempted to scratch it by rubbing against the floor. The big cockroach made a very distinct "crunch". FML

85 comments

lingadoo 7 December 2012, 05:46 Kuwait, Kuwait

Today, I thought I felt something itch my butt as I sat down on the toilet. Sure it was just my imagination, I did my business. When I was done I saw there were 4 cockroaches crawling under the seat. FML