Today, my husband and I went to marriage counselling. I confessed something that was bothering me, but he didn't understand. Our counselor repeated word-for-word what I said right back at him. He turned to me angrily and shouted, "Why couldn't you just say that the first time?!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my husband and I went to our first counseling sessions, where the main focus was communication. When the therapist called us in together to discuss techniques we could use at home, my husband looked around, rolled his eyes, and responded with, "Uh huh" to every question. FML
Today, we went to couples' counselling. After a while the therapist said to me, “Madam, since we've started, your husband has managed two full sentences without you interrupting him, and most of what you said was, frankly, childish whining.” I'm starting to realise I might be the problem. FML
Today, after a nasty fight with my military husband, which resulted in mandatory marriage counseling, he told me we needed to talk about the fight. Not talk it over and apologize; talk it over so our stories are consistent when we see the therapist. FML
Today, my husband and I finally agreed on something: marriage counseling. FML
Today, my marriage counselor got divorced. FML
Today, I mentioned to my wife that we should try marriage counseling. She responded by denying it while throwing a carton of milk at me. FML
Today, I came home and my spouse decided to bring up our past arguments. I apologized to him for the mean things I said, not conjuring his faults. I spoke to him gently and was interested in his thoughts. I validated his feelings. I was engaged in the discussion. He responded to me with, “Too little too late!” FML
Today, I tried to talk to my soon-to-be-husband about how he needs to take a more active approach in his own life. It devolved to him screaming at me and putting words in my mouth. This has been going on for six months. FML
Today, I told my wife that she gets 100% of me and I keep nothing from her. She told me she doesn't want it and that I should get counseling. FML
Today, I told my husband that I didn't think our marriage was going to survive our stillbirth, and that we should get divorced. He said, "No way. We're going to marriage and grief counseling and not giving up on our marriage." He just doesn't understand that I blame myself so much and want to set him free. FML
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Top comments
FMLJFL 5
Counseling for a reason.
brittanyrmh_ 12
Good to see communication in your relationship is a ten out of ten
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Comments (110)
Factor_fml 6
Looks like your words are noise to him, OP. Maybe he hates hearing you so much that he tunes you out.
jelly713 19
OP, keep trying, it's only the first session. If that's not enough maybe distancing yourself during alone time, or working on other priorities, giving him his own space, may help him realize he's pushing you away with arguing or yelling or whatever else he might be doing. Just a suggestion. It'll at least prevent conflict while he's stubborn.
CatchMe25 16
I have a theory that men sometimes just can't hear the level of our voices (the pitch mostly) which would cause a situation like this. I've seen it and gone through it a million times...obviously the white noise theory also applies and for both genders lol. Although he shouldn't shout at you for something he didn't hear. Continue counseling but I think focusing on productive listening and talking TO each other instead of AT each other would go a long way to resolving the communication problems :)
GUNN1313 3
Their is a root cause he is not having some need met figure out what this is and then you can work on fixing the communication problems.
gmc_blossom 21
Bro, your post ******* slaughtered my brain cells.
fordneagles 34
Damn, go and work on your own communication skills, mate.
SApprentice 34
It could be selective hearing. His mind could be tuning out most of your words, leaving him with a warped impression of what you're saying. He may not even realize he's doing it. My parents used to have a big problem with that. Mom could tell Dad something, and he wouldn't hear it the way she said it. I could repeat the same thing back, and he'd get it. My parents actually went to a doctor because of it, because they thought that his hearing was bad, but the doctor told him his hearing was fine. The doctor said he had selective hearing. His brain was just blocking out her words, because he had been with her for so long it was no longer necessary for his mind to process each individual word, but instead his mind was trying to process the concept as a whole. Now, that was never an excuse, but it doesn't change the fact that it was happening. He could do okay if there were zero distractions, but that is rarely the case in life. They divorced. Whatever the problem OP, good luck with your counseling.
dennis96411 12
You need the Manslater! (Search it on YouTube)
_VAL3NT1NA_ 6
Damn! =/ Sounds like a good comedy thoo ^_^
jacobsond 5
What was that you said?
michaelaranda 28
This fml was a little confusing....
Psycho_Babydoll 26
Basically OP said something that her husband didn't understand, but he understood perfectly well when the marriage counsellor repeated the exact same thing and then accused his wife of not having said it in the first place- when she did.
ZombieKnickers_fml 8
Are you the husband mentioned in the FML?
supahcoolperson 0
Maybe he just needed to hear it twice to understand it? But he didn't need to respond that way.