Today, I told my wife that she gets 100% of me and I keep nothing from her. She told me she doesn't want it and that I should get counseling. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my wife told me how she really felt about me, and said she didn't love me anymore. We got married last month. FML
Today, after getting married recently and my wife making a ton of promises about "things" we'd do, she admitted she won't do any of them and said I should just accept that she lied. FML
Today, I found out that my wife is seeing a marriage counselor. With her ex. FML
Today, I mentioned to my wife that we should try marriage counseling. She responded by denying it while throwing a carton of milk at me. FML
Today, my wife of four years confessed to me that she only married me for the money. FML
Today, my wife informed me that she wants a boyfriend but doesn't want a divorce. Also, apparently I'm horrible for not "respecting her feelings" when I told her she can't have both. FML
Today, my marriage counselor got divorced. FML
Today, I really tried to talk to my wife how I feel that she hates me and is with me out of pity. She denied it all but by the end of the conversation mentioned she wants a divorce. FML
Today, my my soon to be ex-wife found out I was telling the truth and never cheated. She wanted to get back together but I told her that we're too far into the divorce proceedings to turn back, and there's just no fixing our marriage. She then told me she's filing for full custody with no visitation rights. FML
Today, my husband and I went to marriage counselling. I confessed something that was bothering me, but he didn't understand. Our counselor repeated word-for-word what I said right back at him. He turned to me angrily and shouted, "Why couldn't you just say that the first time?!" FML
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Top comments
askullnamedbilly 33
You SHOULD get counselling. Both of you. No matter which one of you is 'right' about the situation, it sounds like there's a serious imbalance in your relationship. Maybe she's too distant and doesn't invest enough in the relationship, maybe your expectations are unrealistic and you're too dependent on your wife. It's most likely some kind of mixture of both, but it's important to remember that while your perspective feels real and valid to you, it might not to your partner. It sounds like both of you could benefit from a third, objective person telling you how to approach those problems.
mssileas 25
Hard to judge from that short tale, but getting 100% from someone, even your spouse, means you have to deal with 200% of problems, expectations, experiences etc. Depending on how mentally stable you are, this can be quite a weight to carry. Maybe try to have an open conversation about that.
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Comments (21)
mssileas 25
Hard to judge from that short tale, but getting 100% from someone, even your spouse, means you have to deal with 200% of problems, expectations, experiences etc. Depending on how mentally stable you are, this can be quite a weight to carry. Maybe try to have an open conversation about that.
species4872 20
That's just sad mate, keep your chin up ok.
FueledByFate 24
Relationships can only truly work if both halves give everything their all. If you're doing everything, and she's doing nothing, it's time for a change. She needs to be willing to work just as hard as you do on things. It may be beneficial for you both to take some marriage counseling together, so that you can come to an understanding where you're both happy.
askullnamedbilly 33
You SHOULD get counselling. Both of you. No matter which one of you is 'right' about the situation, it sounds like there's a serious imbalance in your relationship. Maybe she's too distant and doesn't invest enough in the relationship, maybe your expectations are unrealistic and you're too dependent on your wife. It's most likely some kind of mixture of both, but it's important to remember that while your perspective feels real and valid to you, it might not to your partner. It sounds like both of you could benefit from a third, objective person telling you how to approach those problems.
agirlhasnoname_fml 6
damn u have def been down this road before huh?
RichardPencil 32
Why are you telling her this now that you're married? You should have dumped this on her while you were dating. She doesn't want to be your mommy.
ElizaWy 25
Hey! OP's wife here. I thought I'd add a bit of context. Several of you made pretty impressive guesses on the situation. He can be needy. I tend to be independent and, yes, at times too involved with projects and non-relationship things. We were seeing someone for marital counseling to work through these things a while back. The reason that stopped is because I got sick. It started with migraines once a week, then three times a week. Then they just stopped going away. I've been bedridden with what the neurologists are calling a 'status migraine' for nearly three months now, and I'm really worried for him. Some days I can hardly take care of myself, much less his emotional needs, and he needs to get some help that's not from me because (in my opinion) he's cracking under the strain of juggling work, college, not-entirely-realistic marriage expectations, and now a wife with an invisible pickax in her temporal lobe. And after all that, factor in that he's not close to his parents, and doesn't have a ton of friends in the area... you get the picture. All in all, it's sucky all around. :( We'll do our best to get through.
mssileas 25
Hello! So cool that you're speaking up... I was guessing that because it reminds me of my SO. I'm pretty independant (and like it that way) which sometimes leaves him with the impression that I have nothing to take care of anyway and kind of expects me to take on his responsibilites as well. I never mean to hurt him when I tell him that I can't do that, but I'm his partner not his mother and each of us have to deal with certain things on our own. We can support each other, but not completely rely on the other person to have a grip on everything 24/7. I hope everything works out well for you, get better soon!
ElizaWy 25
It certainly has its challenges... sometimes it can feel like you're a drained battery, and it can be hard to communicate what you need at that point. And sometimes it's hard to explain the difference between rejection and needing space. That said, some good has come out of all of this. He's been better about respecting my boundaries (I don't like to be touched when I'm in pain, his first instinct is to give reassuring pats and snuggles, that sort of thing). He's been taking great care of me when he's not working, and I've been making a point to be pleasant and give what affection I can. Sometimes I make it. Sometimes not. I stand by what I said, though. His life can not (and should not) be all about me. I don't think that's what marriage is about, and I really don't think it's sustainable.
natejgardner 4
OP. First, I regret that this ended up on here. I wrote it when I was very upset and I've been hoping it wouldn't get published ever since. Hearing my wife's opinion on here shows me that we've had a great miscommunication. I was feeling very hurt by differing commitment levels. I was saying she had 100% of me, and it hurt me that she's still not sure she's going to stick around in the marriage. I was shocked that she seemingly was rejecting my commitment to her, but it's clear she interpreted what I said differently than I meant it, and I wasn't speaking clearly at the time. We've only been married half a year now, and as Eliza said she's been sick for half of it. It's been a really rocky start and we haven't had a chance to get much of a foundation built in our marriage. The counseling was helping, but we can't go anymore because she's sick. In any case, I think it's best we deal with our issues ourselves instead of putting them on the internet. I'm really sorry for putting this on here. I'd like bury this.
sw2f2fchik612 12
Hey, it may not be such a bad thing that this got published. Embarrassing, yes, but look: already you got her point of view when it seems like you weren't understanding. And obviously she didn't fully understand your point of view either. Now you got both sides out for you both to read. And while FML is more of an entertainment site, it seems like a lot of people have experienced similar issues (I know I have) and may even have some good advice for you both to consider. No shame man, looks like you both have issues to work out but it seems like your lady wants to work through it just like you do.
socialproduct 19
Who needs counseling when you can just work it out on FML.
agirlhasnoname_fml 6
Oh buddy this isn't gunna be buried, this is gold!!
jmny 1
OP and wife, you two sound like wonderful people who really care about each other! I'm sorry things are so difficult for you right now, and I hope they get better!
creditless 14
and that's where giving it 110% comes from
tosdyke 16
Sounds like a divorce is in your future. . .
MoroseMoose 47
The two of you reconnecting over FML is actually pretty sweet. Good luck to you guys!
dr_unhappy 4
Heyy hope you got ur problems solved after that interface and got laid or something... Man that's what wives are for, get a bff for whatever else .. Also an ****** is said to be a relief for migraines!!