Today, my girlfriend threw my X-box out the window, because I asked her how much she weighs. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my plate. She responded by throwing an empty plate at my windshield. FML
Gamers rise up
Today, my girlfriend destroyed my Xbox, because somewhere in her psycho brain she actually thought it would get me to pay more attention to her, even though I only play 3 hours on a Sunday. Joke's on her, I bought a new one, she’s back on the streets, and I play it a whole lot more now. FML
Today, my female room-mate decided to throw away my xbox, along with a few other possessions because they reminded her of her ex. Furiously, I asked her if "it was that time of the month again." Now I can't feel my balls, and miss my games. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I've recently become serious about getting fit, and have lost nearly 84 pounds. Apparently, when I was fat, I made her look smaller in comparison. When I got slimmer, she insisted I either gain the weight back or she'd leave. So she did. FML
Food for thought
Today, my girlfriend is mentally unhinged. She had a full on temper tantrum and ranted about healthy eating, and how she’s “fat” and needs to lose 30 pounds, all because I suggested Buffalo Wild Wings for dinner. She stormed out of the house. I later ran into her at a local pizza place, devouring a pizza. FML
Today, my girlfriend was telling me how concerned she was about her weight. I told her not to worry, because it gives more cushion for the pushin' anyway. She picked up a lamp and threw it right at my dingleberries. FML
Today, I entered my bedroom, ready to play some COD on my xbox 360. Instead, I find a note where my xbox used to be. It read "You think you can cheat on me and get away with it? Fuck you. I smashed the hell out of your stupid xbox." It was signed by my girlfriend. I never cheated on her. FML
Skinny Love
Today, my girlfriend of 5 years dumped me because she got tired of me being thinner than her and, in her own words, making her look bad. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and threw all my stuff out into the yard because she caught me "texting another woman". Guess it didn't matter to her that the contact name was "Mom". FML
Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML
Top comments
evilshade 0
Does she weight 360 pounds?
McMan 23
Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo why, why hurt the innocent?
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Comments (449)
varkey 7
that sucks, report it accidentally clicked YDI, sorry, I don't know why the hell more ppl clicked that than FYL though
sammieInsanityy 0
lmfao! slap a hoe ;P
tantrum4pres 0
that sucks!!!! i would kill that bitch!!!
Person1233 13
What are you people talking about? I always ask women about their weight! When they hit me, it opens up my legal right to smack a bitch! /trollololol
Dre24 0
win
adaytoremember37 0
wow.maturity people. just because she threw the xbox out the window, doesnt make her stupid or mean that he should dump her.
Erissa 2
It means shes cray-cray, and he should dump her
ImFreeFalling 0
Never ask a woman how much she weighs. Unless she's getting overweight and you're just concerned about her health. Otherwise, YOU GO OP'S GF. Seriously. That was epic. Oh and in case anyone has any rude comments about MY weight because of what I said, I weigh 120. :P YDI.
fearfulsymmetry 1
I don't think I'm as concerned about your weight as I am about your face... (Yeah, I went there because your comment offended me that much.)
ohthebloodygore 16
103, you're an idiot. I could honestly care less if a male/female were to ask for my weight. The doctor does all the time, you don't see the women yelling at him/her. The women who turn all psycho when asked are either crazy or insecure. Or both like OP's girlfriend. I mean he's with her for bollocks sake. He's not going to dump her over her weight; he sees her size and still chooses to be with her. So, how does it even matter?
5t3ff1k4h 47
Sadira - If the boot fits...
vbmg152 19
How old are you? Never ever ever ask a lady how much she weighs!!! It will Always get you in trouble! Doesn't matter if she weighs 100 or 200 pounds, never ask. We take that as "hey you sure are fat!"
Erissa 2
I honestly don't see the big deal is asking how much a woman weighs, a number means nothing, it's about how you look and feel -_-
ImFreeFalling 0
104, I offended you? Seriously? How on Earth did what I say offend YOU?
wwerulez14 6
It's obviously both. And in your case, the choking is likely foreplay. Throw your wife in and you have yourself a fun evening right there...