Today, my girlfriend of a couple of months texted me that she was very sad because her puppy had just passed away. Feeling sorry for her, I bought her another puppy of the same breed. I wrapped it in a blanket and placed it on the passenger seat and went to pick her up from school. She sat on it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I texted my girlfriend to tell her that we couldn't hang out because my dog died this morning and we were burying him. She replied that she wasn't going to get stood up by a stupid dog. She then broke up with me. FML
Today, I was in my car with my window down at a red light. Outside, a sweet old lady was sitting on a bench with her dog sleeping next to her. I yelled out the window to tell her how cute her dog was. She replied, "He's dead" and cried. FML
Today, my best friend decided to get herself a new puppy. My dog passed away last week. She named it the same name and got the same breed as mine was. She sees nothing wrong and can’t understand why I’m upset. In fact, she tells me to “stop being a Debbie Downer.” FML
Today, my girlfriend whom I'm crazy about broke up with me out of the blue. After pleading with her unsuccessfully, I called my mom for comfort and advice. She informed me that my dog had died. FML
Today, my 12 year-old dog died. My boyfriend's attempts to comfort me involved him muttering, "At least she knows how to play dead now." FML
Today, my girlfriend canceled our date I've been looking forward to all week because her dog was having puppies. She doesn't have a dog. FML
Today, after calling my boyfriend and telling him that my dog had just died, he hesitated and stuttered, "She was old, sick, and suffering. Babe, it was her time to go." He then informed me he had to go to his friend's house and hung up. My dog was two years-old, in great health, and was hit by a car. FML
Today, I open my front door and saw a covered basket with a card from my girlfriend on it. I picked it up and read, "Hope this cheers you up." I uncovered the basket to find a golden labrador puppy. Its eyes were closed and it wasn't breathing. FML
Today, my new girlfriend has a purse dog, a chihuahua. The thing is so small, I didn’t see it, tripped over it, and my knee broke its back. It had to be put down. I don’t have a girlfriend anymore. FML
Today, I heard that my crush’s dog had died. For some reason, my first instinct when I saw him was to say, “Oh my god, I heard that your dog died!” He started crying. FML
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Top comments
jaydnnx 0
what happened to the puppy???
CallMeHush 1
That is just F'ed up.
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Comments (323)
valuemeal2 1
I realize your intentions were good, but you shouldn't have gone out and bought her a new one. She needs time to grieve, and it should be up to her whether she wants a new dog or not. YDI, sorry.
DeservedIt 0
I could tell the puppy would die the moment OP called it "it". People who call dogs "it" instead of he or she don't like dogs, are careless around them and most of the time "accidentally" kill them (assuming stupidity is considered an accidental cause of death).
sugarbabyxoxo 2
lmao
MadaZer0 8
You can't really take all of predix words lightly XD or... Can you?
sugarbabyxoxo 2
@ madazer0, huh? lol what do you mean
MadaZer0 8
Well I honestly can't tell if he just kids around... Or if he really means all that he says...
sugarbabyxoxo 2
lmfao hahaha yeahh. I got his number... hahaha I got skills that pay the bills! hahaha
MadaZer0 8
That cheating *****~
sugarbabyxoxo 2
we can share XD
MadaZer0 8
Lies! You have no heart XD
MadaZer0 8
Understandable... I'll leave you to your *******
sugarbabyxoxo 2
haha I wish there was a 'like' button like on facebook hahah.
Dubstep_fml 1
thats interesting. you're pribably chowing down on a hambuger as you say this you hypocritical ****.
sugarbabyxoxo 2
woooo! there goes Ragity Anne again hahah stfu
Jen_J_the_J 0
#81 the puppy couldve been asleep...deh OP u sound like a pretty lovely bf, just maybe a bit soon to buy a new puppy. chances r if the gf was depressed cuz her puppy died she probably just jumped into the car without looking, or thought it was a blanket. shes not exactly gonna open the car door and go hmm a blanket, there must b something living under it, lets check!... Snickerdoodles, i think uve said enough on this 1 FML to last you all your fricken life, not that you have one.
iSushix3 0
Whaats up with the novels here ? Seriously, dont write long shit, cause nobody gives a shit.
MadaZer0 8
I give a lot of shit! As long as peoples opinions are given out I care for a lot. of. shit!
rider12 0
it would be moving as if
MadaZer0 8
You are my butter to my peanut... Wait... Holy shit XD LMAO
thump_fml 0
who buys a "girlfriend of a couple months" anything at all, let alone a puppy?
corme_fml 0
Guys that aren't cheap ass douche bags??
heartagram_in_ro 0
Just curious, does it make your ****** wet to ALWAYS correct people? Why do you continue to do it even after proving you're guilty of screwing up?
sugarbabyxoxo 2
lmfao hahaha this comment made my night
hjrn 0
does anyone else think this sounds extremely fake? when does a puppy just lay still in a towel?
null_fml 11
When it's sleeping. But that doesn't happen in a car, so you're probably right.