Today, my girlfriend of a couple of months texted me that she was very sad because her puppy had just passed away. Feeling sorry for her, I bought her another puppy of the same breed. I wrapped it in a blanket and placed it on the passenger seat and went to pick her up from school. She sat on it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I texted my girlfriend to tell her that we couldn't hang out because my dog died this morning and we were burying him. She replied that she wasn't going to get stood up by a stupid dog. She then broke up with me. FML
Today, I was in my car with my window down at a red light. Outside, a sweet old lady was sitting on a bench with her dog sleeping next to her. I yelled out the window to tell her how cute her dog was. She replied, "He's dead" and cried. FML
Today, my best friend decided to get herself a new puppy. My dog passed away last week. She named it the same name and got the same breed as mine was. She sees nothing wrong and can’t understand why I’m upset. In fact, she tells me to “stop being a Debbie Downer.” FML
Today, my girlfriend whom I'm crazy about broke up with me out of the blue. After pleading with her unsuccessfully, I called my mom for comfort and advice. She informed me that my dog had died. FML
Today, my 12 year-old dog died. My boyfriend's attempts to comfort me involved him muttering, "At least she knows how to play dead now." FML
Today, my girlfriend canceled our date I've been looking forward to all week because her dog was having puppies. She doesn't have a dog. FML
Today, after calling my boyfriend and telling him that my dog had just died, he hesitated and stuttered, "She was old, sick, and suffering. Babe, it was her time to go." He then informed me he had to go to his friend's house and hung up. My dog was two years-old, in great health, and was hit by a car. FML
Today, I open my front door and saw a covered basket with a card from my girlfriend on it. I picked it up and read, "Hope this cheers you up." I uncovered the basket to find a golden labrador puppy. Its eyes were closed and it wasn't breathing. FML
Today, my new girlfriend has a purse dog, a chihuahua. The thing is so small, I didn’t see it, tripped over it, and my knee broke its back. It had to be put down. I don’t have a girlfriend anymore. FML
Today, I heard that my crush’s dog had died. For some reason, my first instinct when I saw him was to say, “Oh my god, I heard that your dog died!” He started crying. FML
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Top comments
jaydnnx 0
what happened to the puppy???
CallMeHush 1
That is just F'ed up.
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Comments (323)
cutiepie11 0
did she kill it?
jamaicap 0
ya shudda moved it
omg_thats_funny 0
oh my god! :'(
SeximusPrime 0
Sweet gesture, but STUPID. You can't replace a pet that just died. You just did the equivalent of telling a woman who just had a miscarriage to "just have another baby." She could, but it won't be the one she lost.
carkel 0
well, you could've told her to NOT sit on a moving blanket. and you should never get someone a puppy to 'replace' on that died, that's just insensistive
Mirequetz 6
Wow. So many trash comments that have nothing to do with the OP. Anyway. Your girlfriend is an idiot, so are you. You don't even deserve to own a goldfish if they're that mentally retarded around a puppy.
in_wonderland 1
i'm apparently the only one thinking that there is no way she could have killed a puppy by what was, i'm sure, a half a second of sitting on it before, i'm sure, as any human being would have, she felt it under her ass and jumped out of the car or grabbed it out from under her. unless of course she is a fat ass.
tprankd 0
Silly Americans and their lbs.
blastvortex 4
You may have just found out why the first one died. Your girlfriend is a klutz, OP.
lilmizzmuffet 0
oh F!! RIP the puppies..is your girlfriend blind or something? -_-