Today, my girlfriend noticed that I looked upset and asked me what was wrong. I told her I was sexually frustrated. Her response? "What are you telling me for?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend told me she was sexually frustrated. Naturally, I started coming on to her, only for her to shove me away and snap that just because she was sexually frustrated, it didn't mean that she wanted sex. Huh? FML
Today, my girlfriend told me how disappointed and depressed she was that she could never make me hard. She started ranting about her looks and how she fails at everything. I didn't know how to reply. I was hard while she told me. FML
Today, my wife asked why I was so grumpy. I admitted that I was horny and sexually frustrated. She went on an hour long tirade about how I "shouldn't need sex to not be a jerk" and how I need to handle my own needs. FML
Today, in the middle of having sex, my girlfriend stopped moaning. I asked what was wrong. She said, "I'm bored." FML
Today, my girlfriend complained about our recent dry spell. I've been under a lot of stress at work, but I told her some things she could do to help. She decided a better idea was to scream that I don't care about her needs, and that I should never "burden her" with my problems. FML
Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend asked me, "Are you sure you're a guy?" I still have no idea what that was for. FML
Today, I went to my girlfriend's house. She had promised me we'd get it on so I couldn't wait. When I got there, I didn't get it on. Instead, I got a list of reasons why I make her depressed. FML
Today, I went to my girlfriend's and she was wearing some sexy lingerie. After making out passionately for 10 minutes, I started to undress myself, only to have her stop me, confessed that she still wasn't sexually attracted to me. FML
Today, during sex, my girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML
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Top comments
Screwie 25
Because you asked, bitch. Proper answer.
DomDomxoxo 16
With her attitude, might as well use your hand.
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Comments (252)
the_derps 4
it's always cute when the stupids make assumptions about people because they don't agree with them.
skoob1 12
You should just stop. You're being attacked on too many fronts.
DocBastard 40
You mean like you assuming I was referring to rape? You mean like when you assumed Noor was a man? Yes, you clearly have a terminal case of The Stupids.
the_derps 4
still mad? :(
CptZoe 10
Oh christ, it is still posting..
the_derps 4
lol, he didn't "prove my hypocrisy". he just got butthurt and started screaming about how everyone should know who he is. it's interesting how there is so much "hypocrisy" in my comments, and I'm such a "feminazi", but nobody can point these things out.
Cinn_fml 23
You're a hypocrite for getting annoyed that we disagree with your assumptions when you suggest that people shouldn't get upset with people disagreeing with their assumptions. Especially when you talk about assumptions about people when you make assumptions about people.
DocBastard 40
A) "Butthurt" is a term used by people who have no real argument, because you think I'll get offended by it. B) I never screamed anything. I simply proved that your "widdle boys" stupidity was wrong and you can't handle it. C) I DID prove your hypocrisy, and you can't handle that either. Please continue posting. You're making yourself look more and more foolish with each new one. It's quite entertaining.
ForeverAloneGal 23
That's when you say, "So when you find out I shagged another girl, you knew why." Because it's only cheating if your girl doesn't know.
nevershouttami 11
No wonder you're forever alone.
ForeverAloneGal 23
ForeverSarcastic
captainburke 5
Nothing wrong with being forever alone
ForeverAloneGal 23
Seriously though, I don't condone cheating. That was just my odd "humor". Have fun down voting this.
ChristineAnn58 8
I'm sexually frustrated too. You're not alone. If they don't want sex then it seems like they really don't care about your needs. As long as they are doing what they want, you're frustration is insignificant :/ try communicating. Other than that, there is nothing you can do. Sorry.
dmac843 2
Try dumping her.
TheNewGuy03 29
I hate to keep commenting on your comments, but it feels merited. Sex really *isn't* that complicated. Yes, it's not quite "whip it out and go" for some people, but that doesn't mean that there is some drawn-out, labyrinthine path that grants you to access to the golden ticket of lovin'. It should be a natural thing ... that people enjoy naturally! Also, there's even further news for you: there *are* men that exist that have low sex drives! Color me surprised! Not all dudes wanna pork around the clock. Simply because you and your husband are sexually incompatible doesn't mean that the same scenario applies to all couples. :D
ChristineAnn58 8
You're an idiot, they're dating. Sex is apart of a relationship. She's not a "sex object" she's supposed to take Interest in him. Dummy.
the_derps 4
she is not obligated to have sex with him. sex is part of a relationship, not a reason to mope around like a little bitch if you don't get any. me and my boyfriend don't have that much sex at all and we've been together and happy as shit for over 2 years.
kiwienne 21
Freaking out here, forgot to click on reply
AphyTheBronette 15
Christine resorting to name calling to prove your point only shows your low I.Q. Please expand your grammar and don't get frustrated over a website.
the_derps 4
keep downvoting my comments and confirming how right I am. ;) the truth hurts doesn't it?
Cinn_fml 23
No, it doesn't hurt actually.
the_derps 4
cry more.
monocyte 4
The fact that she asked you what's wrong when you looked upset is a kind gesture. Her angry response I can actually understand.. It's not that she doesn't want you, she is not in the mood and you nagging about it just makes her less likely to wanna have sex with you (even if she was planning on it that same day) because it's like asking her to do a chore. Seriously I doubt she'd reject you if you actually put just a bit of effort in arousing her like starting to kiss and touch, maybe a massage.. It's more sexy than pouting and claiming to be sexually frustrated, don't you think? All guys, particularly in long-term relationships need to remember about such things. Foreplay is your free ticket to sex.
l0v3p4in 7
WOMEN: "The more you nag, the less you'll get. Keep that in mind." Just wanted to be diplomatic.
QueenSaru 28
Waaah... answering a question SHE brought up is nagging now? Dear Cheese, since when? So he has every right to accuse her of nagging if this had happened in reverse? Presumably if he's noticeably upset but she doesn't know why, he hasn't been following her around 24/7 saying, "Honey I'm horny. Honey. Honey lets have sex. Can we have sex now? How about now?" THAT would be nagging.
QueenSaru 28
Yes, but if you're turning someone down for sex EVERY DAY, and you don't know why he's upset (IF you're in a relationship where you're having sex, obviously not if you're not intimate yet), sorry, but you're an idiot. That's like if your kid asks you every day to take them to the park, and you say no every day, and then you notice they're upset. Logical conclusion would be: They're upset because you refuse to take them to the park.
QueenSaru 28
Also, how do you someone's not in the mood unless you ask? If you say you're not in the mood when I ask you on Monday, I shouldn't ask you on Wednesday because I should know you're still not in the mood, and if I ask, now I'm nagging? This is seriously flawed logic...
QueenSaru 28
To be honest then, it would be horrible to just sit around and wait for someone to let me know I'm allowed to touch them. What if you're only in the mood twice a year? Do you let him go out and pick people up in between those bi-annual sexings? While I understand that not everyone's sex drives are at the same level, if they have to make concessions to avoid hurting your feelings, then you should be doing the same now and then.
TheNewGuy03 29
suzyqt -- I'd actually be curious about what your husband has to say about your differences. It's ... intriguing. And, for some reason, it makes me ... sad. Not entirely sure why...