Today, I went to my girlfriend's and she was wearing some sexy lingerie. After making out passionately for 10 minutes, I started to undress myself, only to have her stop me, confessed that she still wasn't sexually attracted to me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm not in the mood anymore." FML
Today, I got home from work and found my girlfriend waiting for me in some skimpy lingerie. She ended up pushing me onto the bed, and as I lay there, expecting to be pleasured, she pulled out a pair of adult-sized footsie pajamas and dressed me in them. FML
Today, I was dead tired and just wanted sleep, so I jumped into bed the second the day's chores were done. Of fucking course, this was the day my fiancée decided to end our eight-week dry spell and came in wearing sexy lingerie. I couldn't stay hard due to exhaustion, and now she's been crying. FML
Today, my normally-prudish girlfriend grabbed my crotch and said, "I want you to fuck me like I've never been fucked." I obliged. She loved it, until after we'd finished, when she decided that she felt "cheap, gross, and used" and started a huge fight. FML
Today, I went to my girlfriend's house. She had promised me we'd get it on so I couldn't wait. When I got there, I didn't get it on. Instead, I got a list of reasons why I make her depressed. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was sexually frustrated. Naturally, I started coming on to her, only for her to shove me away and snap that just because she was sexually frustrated, it didn't mean that she wanted sex. Huh? FML
Today, my wife told me she wanted to try something that would turn me on immediately. While I was in our bed, she came in, wearing only the underwear she took from our 13 year-old daughter's closet. Now she doesn't understand why I'm genuinely disgusted and don't want to have sex with her. FML
Today, my incredibly self-conscious girlfriend decided to get over her fears and let me see her in her underwear. She did a short strip tease, crawled on top of me, and asked what I thought. I couldn't think of anything to say besides, "Your bra and panties don't match." FML
Today, while heading to the bathroom, I saw my girlfriend putting some lingerie under my bed. I stupidly thought it was for some sexy time later. Well, later on, she dramatically "found" the lingerie and broke up with me. Almost everyone believes her story and thinks I'm a dirty cheater. FML
Today, my girlfriend came up to me and told me we would never do anything sexual in our relationship. She said I was too adorable to take seriously in bed. FML
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Top comments
Tedet 0
You dress your hand up in sexy lingerie?
anelard 6
That is a disgusting thing to say to anyone. You should be ashamed of yourself.
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Comments (112)
skatagurl 0
is she gay
lolwut_fail 0
Yes, because if you don't find EVERY person of the opposite sex attractive, you have to be gay. Try giving head to Phil Spector.
Finnboghi 0
Probably not. Welcome to the friend zone, OP. Make yourself at home; you're here forever.
genius_man16 1
YDI FOR BEING FAT but really, that sucks, i'm sorry, but there are other fish in the sea.
ireply_w_lyrics 0
What if he doesnt like fish?
plexico 4
lolwut_fail, WIN! If head hair correlates with pubic hair in any way, giving head to Phil Spector would involve munching on a giant ball of fur and probably never coming remotely close to genitals.
canucksrule88 0
yeah but do the other fish taste as good?
Finnboghi 0
Bigger fish would probably say so.
mandoopandoo 0
why does she consider herself your gf if she isn't attracted to you enough to have sex or see you naked? damn
canucksrule88 0
maybe shes a ***** that just wants to make out w/ppl?
the_stereotype 0
i know she doesn't HAVE to be attracted to him, but she really does sound lesbian
Scorpitarrius 0
same thing happened to me. It sucks...really badly. Manipulativity isn't good, people. Lol
skatagurl 0
and you would know.
daemonsparta 16
#13 how do you know he's fat?
0okm 0
oooo, ouch man, that sucks, FYL
wow18 3
What she really means is that she doesn't find him attractive with his clothes off. She probably finds him hot/cute/handsome from the face but just not sexy or hot when it comes to his body, and therefore she can't have sex with him. I know lots of guys who're attractive from the face and i wouldn't mind making out with them but i wouldn't find them too hot with their clothes off. Simply because i can't have sex with a guy who's either too skinny or chubby at all. OP, sucks to be you. Either meet her requirement or just call it off. Your gf is kind of stupid for staying with you if she doesn't find you attractive, unless she just has no interest in sex.
lolx7 5
maybe she wants to stay a virgin. calm down op don't be mad just because you didn't **** her
ViCT0RiA_fml 0
oh wow... that sucks. (:
TheKitsune 0
So dump her and find a girl with a sex drive :/
JustTh4tGuy 0
i'd shoot myself
hithereimcasey 3
Says the emo
stephan18 23
With that picture, your comment doesn't surprise me.. x)
dhooks111490 8
Since your emo, you probably should anyway
anelard 6
That is a disgusting thing to say to anyone. You should be ashamed of yourself.
Tyguy823 14
Shut the up. Don't put other people's mind in the gutters
dcea 17
emo kid giving advice
Arcterion 0
Ouch. :P
miamiFTW_ 0
your picture is scary. :(
baritone1whs07 1
yeah..sorry to hear that..maybe you should leave her cause she seems like a real B****..
alexgisforme3 0
lmfaooo
_YDI 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
YDI for living in california
werzal 5
ok Stupid Question-new to FML what is YDI? I know--Im daft!
werzal 5
Your just a nasty selfish wanker
XOfiestypixie 0
werzal, i think you need to learn the concept of trolls next. People who put "YDI for (insert random reason with no relevance)" are called trolls. It makes them feel cool when they say stuff like that because they have even less than a life than the rest of us on fml. Just give them a thumbs down and never EVER feed them...even though it's fun sometimes =)
Ohnothingreally 0
Do you think it would be fun to troll a troll?
werzal 5
Thanks :) I will :)
fallenwings 0
OH ouch bro,, tho i know how you feel good luck on it mine wants me to change pre much everything about me =-=
MoonyIce 0
And you're still with her? Jeez man. Find someone who wants you for you, not you after all the changes she wants you to make. :/