Today, my girlfriend and I were making out, and about to have sex, when she asked me to "do that thing we did yesterday". We haven't had sex in 6 days. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend said she’s been wanting to have sex lately. We haven’t done it in so long, I've lost track. We still haven’t done it. Part of me wants to fuck someone else. FML
Today, I had sex with my girlfriend. This is the seventh time in a row that she hasn't moved or made any noises the entire way through. FML
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I haven't had sex for a long time, so when she got out of the shower I was ready on our bed to finally do it. Her response? "Really? Now? I just got out of the shower." FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend telling his friends about how great the sex was last night, and how he loves to "make a bitch bend over". We've been dating for 3 years, and haven't made love in several weeks. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, my girlfriend of a year and I had sex for the first time in several weeks due to relationship problems; I came in less than 10 seconds. We're still having problems. FML
Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. We are both virgins. After we kissed and I took down my pants, she screamed and said "That THING is going to break me." We never did it. FML
Today, my girlfriend complained that we never have sex anymore. The only way she ever wants sex is missionary, with barely any foreplay. When I asked if we could spice things up and mentioned a few simple ideas, she said the conversation was making her uncomfortable and changed the subject. FML
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Top comments
somnula 9
she probably just meant "last time" and said yesterday. nbd
irishdubr 0
U shoulda said "ok" and started jerkin off. Then ask her what SHE did yesterday.
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Comments (90)
bluephoenix1498 0
six days F YOUR life geez your life is so over
Always4tehlolz 0
It is possible that she simply mis-spoke and meant to say "last time" instead. It is entirely possible, I know I do it all the time. But I would have to say the real problem at hand here is why did you take the time to post this on FML instead of asking her what she meant? I would assume that you did anyway and got your answer at that very moment (if you didnt, then you're retarded/living in denial), so the real question is, what are the details man? WAS she cheating on you? If so, then yes, definitely FYL. If not, and she really did just mis-speak, then how is this a FML?
Shyman4ever 0
Maybe she wasn't even talking about sex. Maybe she was talking about the way you kissed her yesterday or something.
Sturmeh 0
Since when did realisitc FMLs occur frequently, sometimes the obvious aftermath needs to be omited in order to make a short sweet FML. I love how people cry at incomplete ones but they troll the living daylights out of ones posted by bots.
bzlnv8 0
learn it, what was it?
xFenix81x 0
And I quote The 40 Year Old Virgin: " Ho for sho."
sockmonkey560 0
first of all, why is everyone so mad that the first person said "FIRST" it's not a huge deal, half of the people who were mad would do the same thing! second the girlfriend probably meant to say "last time" people mix up words, unless she was drunk then i'd dump her for cheating
treli1593 0
Welll..... this could mean one of three things. 1.) She's giving you a hint that she's not in the mood. 2.) She's cheating on you. 3.) She meant 'last time' instead of 'yesterday'. FYL
attebury1 0
I accidently say things like that all the time... It's not a big deal, she probably ment the last time y'all did. Your an ass for jumping to a conclusion simply because she misworded a sentence which would be easy to do in the heat of things. YDI for being a accusitive jumpy prick
fmylifeandurs 0
UR OBVIOUSLY bad in bed