Today, my friend and I dressed up as dice for Halloween. The rest of the night consisted of us, harassed by drunks asking, 'Can we roll you around?' and constantly being shaken. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to a party dressed as a Pinata. Drunk people tried to hit me all night. FML
Today, I went to my friend's costume party dressed as Michael Myers. My costume must've been too conspicuous because it drew violent attention. I'm still sore from the pushing, tackling, tripping, falling and body shots. FML
Today, I went to a Halloween party with people from work. As the night passed, my boss got hammered and started throwing food at people. It was fun and games until I accidentally spilled his tenth beer. His response? To slam a hollowed out pumpkin full of chocolate mousse over my head. FML
Today, I dressed up as a ghost and walked down the street to meet my friends. A dog somehow got loose and decided my "flowy" costume was the perfect chew toy. I spent the evening dodging an overly enthusiastic dog and getting barked at. FML
Today, I was walking to my friend's Halloween themed birthday party in my zombie costume. Apparently, my crazy coke addicted neighbor found the costume too realistic. He tackled me. FML
Today, my friends threw me a Halloween themed party for my sweet sixteen. When I arrived, one of my friends jumped out from behind the door, dressed as Michael Myers. I peed myself in front of everyone I knew. FML
Today, it's Halloween. I get bullied every day and this was no exception, but this time I got beat up so hard I bled. Everyone thought it was part of my costume. FML
Today, I went bowling with some friends. After a few beers I was showing off spinning the ball around on the tip of my finger. One trip to the ER and two crushed nuts later, I've found that mixing alcohol and heavy shiny balls is not a good idea. FML
Today, I'm at odds with my fiancée because a drunk girl approached me at a Halloween party and complimented my costume. I barely acknowledged the woman and made polite small talk until she walked away. Apparently, I was too friendly and should have shooed the woman away rudely and immediately. FML
Today, I went to a party dressed as a zombie. Everyone admired my hilarious "zombie dancing". Those were my regular dance moves. FML
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Top comments
tinithe 0
Oh Christ, you dressed up as dice and people actually wanted to shake you?! I mean seriously what were those guys smoking? If you didn't want to be freaking shook, you should of gone as a small child.
Patrickkkkk 0
lol
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Comments (98)
supersparta4300 0
why the fuckk would you dress up as dice? I mean WTF, that's not even scary lol
untoward 0
costumes don't have to be scary. hence, the silly girls that wear their panties and bras and a head band with cat ears in public. they aren't scary just starved for attention.
KrazyKatz3 26
It is a little bit scary... Like how far they'll go for attention. How little self esteem they have...
unidentified_sta 5
The proper kind of starving
maphineRAWRS 10
win #22 :)
sourgirl101 29
It really wouldn't matter what you dressed up as. Guys are going to hit on you. Ex: Cat- Does your pussy need to be pet? Nurse- Can you check my temperture? Cop- I need to be handcuffed. I've been bad. Witch- I got your wand right here! Bunny- Want to **** like rabbits? Ummm... I'm missing a bunch but you get the idea.
docscientist 10
Uh, you chose some of the most sexualized costumes out there...
SmallTownCutie 0
I dressed up as a hippie ( jeans, peasant blouse, etc.) and still got hit on. I wasn't acting sexy and I didn't look sexy. Guys will hit on everything. I think that's what she was trying to point out :P
sourgirl101 29
Yes it was. I however failed to see that it was a dude writing this. I saw harassed and automaticly thought girls.
sourgirl101 29
Yes it was. I however failed to see that it was a dude writing this. I saw harassed and automaticly thought girls.
untoward 0
Sry bout that
Xavi89 0
me an my cousin are going to the super dome as super Mario brothers!!!!! but dice? WTF dude ytdi
thakiller 0
Tokyo has lots of casino's :)
aback 5
Next year, dress as a baseball player. If they try to "play with your balls" you can smack 'em with your bat.
vball_luvah 2
YES!
bellagml 0
win
bigbadtim 7
That party must have been pair-a-dice for you.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Being shaken* At least, I think so, since there's an aux verb.
FLCL4711Fox 0
u think? nothing sadder then an unsure grammar Nazi...
FLCL4711Fox 0
*than phew close one
redbluegreen 41
I find it sad that you only corrected one of your errors. I'm shocked you even know the difference between than and then.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
FLCL: Yes, "I think". I'm not pretentious enough to affect certainty when I'm not, in fact, certain. Many commenters are better at grammar than I am, and I was leaving myself room to be corrected gracefully. I wrote an unsure statement, rather than a question, because the format of the former would be more eye-catching to those who could confirm or deny my claim. Furthermore, I'm not naziing just for the hell of it. I was referring to the OP's grammar, not a commenter's. I know the mods appreciate such corrections, as they make the site more professional. Note that the FML was indeed edited accordingly after my post. (Thanks, mods.) However, I do hate to bring someone down. If you prefer more straight-forward, definitive grammar corrections, I'm happy to oblige in the fashion you're accustomed to: "You* think? [There's]* nothing sadder than an unsure Grammar* Nazi.* (or grammar nazi.*) Phew!* [That was a]* close one.* It's glaringly obvious that you're not entitled to criticize anyone, you lazy illiterate fuckmole. Learn how to communicate and someone just might give a shit about your opinion of them. What the goddam hell is wrong with you?!" You're welcome. :]
sparta98 4
#68 Holy crap. That is the singular most epic put-down I've ever seen on this website.
a_b_b_s 1
68 FTW
hcovballer247 0
If ur dice for halloween you shouldve expected that one coming...
joshH7 0
lmao! how is thisan fml?? xD it'd be laughs for the random strangers and yourself!!! make it so theyalways get snake eyes!!! xD