Today, my elderly father-in-law grabbed my breasts in the pool at a family gathering. I'd let it go as an accident if this wasn't the 4th time it happened today. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I caught my elderly neighbour skinny-dipping in my pool. FML
Today, for the third time since breakfast, I accidentally walked in on my father wanking. FML
Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML
Today, my family and I were celebrating my dad's birthday. The two of us were standing by the pool chatting, and I jokingly said "You're old now." I suppose I should have expected him to shove me into the pool, my phone still in hand, and retort, "You're soaked now." FML
Today, my obese mother-in-law took her top off at our pool party, exposing her sagging breasts. When I told her to cover herself, she lifted her breasts, turned them inwards, and squeezed them together while staring me in the eyes. She kept doing this on and off for the next two hours. FML
Today, I was verbally and physically attacked in a public pool, because I was swimming in what a grandma claimed was her part of the pool. Since I'm a very tolerant person, I calmly tried to talk some reason into the elderly lady. The lifeguard had to come to protect me. FML
Today, I was at the pool with two boys I babysit. The eldest wouldn't get out of the pool so I pretended to call his dad. He then ran out of the pool, pushed me down, grabbed my phone, chucked it into the pool and then ran back into the pool. FML
Today, I took my two-year-old daughter swimming. While sitting in the hot tub, my daughter pointed to the elderly man sitting across from us and mumbled something. I couldn't understand her, so I asked her to repeat it. After two more attempts, she shouted, "MOM! He has big boobs!" FML
Today, my father-in-law asked me if I have breast implants in front of the whole family for the third time this month. FML
Today, at the water park, my grandmother's boob slipped out. Every time I close my eyes, I see her dangling breast in my mind. FML
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Top comments
TheEpicFoo 0
creepers gonna creep.
Shootamonkey3 0
You must have some nice ****.
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Comments (309)
howslife123 0
check your bathroom for video cameras
fruitschinpo 0
lol. dontcha think there shud be a "sucks to be you" button ? nefore we get a button like that , FYL for having a creep father in law
CateXOX 0
"Sucks to be you" is pretty much the same as "**** your life", don't you think?
BWill9014 4
31 idk what you were thinking...
FFML_314 12
He was thinking that making "random" suggestions would shy away from the fact that he's a moron. OR he was thinking something exciting would happen. Like DocBastard would emerge from his coffin and bless him with his infamy. He's probably into bondage and chicken *******. What do I know though, right?
iRiS890 5
Right.
mcintosh123 15
B-E-A-UTIFUL.
mcintosh123 15
He wants to know the difference between fake and real.
cindayy77 0
This reminds me of when I went to a wave pool, it was in a water park and I went with my cousin, there was this older stranger, and he was right next to me, and he kept touching my boob... it was creepy no doubt
cindayy77 0
and he kept looking and smiling at me, he was also talking to me...
wisericky 12
hey, your that girl from the wave pool... good times.
Predental 5
step away from the pedo
CitrusGirl 0
That sucks but you will get no sympathy from the fml community- if you don't believe me check the thumbing
IbanezSprinter 0
39- and you let him...??
Linux_fml 0
no he didn't, he was trying to swim far away!
Predental 5
reminds me of Herbert from family guy!
meg238f 0
How? She is not a young boy. This is nothing like Herbert.
wisericky 12
grab his dick and show him how it feels. im sure he will understand.
slynoble32 11
shes gonna show him how her hand feels on his dik
nerdytacos 3
he'd probably like that Lol
nerdytacos 3
he'd probably like that Lol
MuchDance90s 0
that's the joke, tards
AMAZINashleigh 6
Hey, its been a while. Give him a break!
Tolzien4Heisman 0
ur cute
wilsonchewy 0
I'll play with your breasts
AMAZINashleigh 6
Ummmm no. Hahahah.
please_shoot_me 0
Hey Ashleigh, it's been awhile for me too. can I have a shot with yours :S
perdix 31
You shouldn't wear a bikini top that says "CAN BE USED AS FLOTATION DEVICES." It confuses old people.
FFML_314 12
I don't think it was the shirt. You can never rely on an old mans vision. I'm sure it was the smell of spit and tramp coming from her body. Seems to give people the wrong impression.
perdix 31
"spit and tramp?" Only you, FFML_314, could come up with such a turn of a phrase. It's good to see you back. I've missed you.