mugged
United States
Today, my dog had to choose between protecting me from a mugger or eating an apple. He chose the apple. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Today, I asked my wife who she would choose, me or the dog. She chose the dog. No hesitation. FML
woofwoof
Izmir, Turkey
Unattack dog
Today, I got mugged while walking my dog. He seemed to be OK with it. FML
macguy
Quezon City, Philippines
Today, I got mugged. For my Big Mac. What the fuck? FML
Anonymous
Sanford, United States
Not so smooth criminal
Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML
mr_dinzaster
This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff
Cartoonish
Today, a dog came into my yard. I bent down to pet him, forgetting I had a burger in my hand. The dog grabbed it and ran. FML
Bad boy
Naughty boy
Today, I took my dog to the park. While chatting with another dog owner, my dog managed to steal their sandwich and ran off with it. I had to chase my sandwich-thieving dog through the entire park. FML
anyonmus
Westminster, United States
Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML
Cedar Buero
Cape Girardeau, United States
Today, my dog thought it would be a good idea to use my phone as a chew toy. FML
SterlingEnigma
United States
Irony at a base level
Today, I decided to start making healthier decisions. Instead of the usual cheeseburger I have for lunch I ate an apple instead. I took one bite and broke one of my teeth. Apparently, apples keep the doctor away, but not dentists. FML
ZAnon
Houston, United States
Today, my 97-pound pitbull wagged and chased his tail while I was being mugged. FML
Top comments
BLAZZZEEEDDD 1
dogs always go for food
AlienX_fml 0
I usually bring an apple when i mug people. Just in case they have a dog.
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Comments (156)
SuperNova69 0
Hah that sucks my pitbull would go for anyone who came in the house it didn't know, 100 pounds of beast and if u had food it would take it and then tare you apart lol
pappuyaer 0
dogs dont eat apples & if it went for an apple, you must be really a bitch ;-)
irokyoursox 6
that sucks... wouldn't happen to me cuz bear grylls taught me how to fight muggers
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
I love how on man v. wild he will do the most ridiculous things. "The sun went down! better drink my own urine and then eat road kill!"
rush1869 0
shudda gotten a German Shepherd really smart and loyal
Dekenaye 0
he probably thought the apple was the one mugging you
laurbear12 3
granny smith lol
m1ssophiebee 0
oh nooo~ my puppy is the same way -.-
eminembmwh 0
get a Pitt bull
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
I love apples too! Mmmm a crisp pink lady apple... heavenly.
hey_kid94 9
I would have gone for the apple too :)