Today, my dick of a neighbor tried to file a noise complaint against me, all because I have the flu and am sneezing a lot. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
#blessed
Today, I had to let my nosy landlord into my apartment to ensure I didn't have an unapproved guest over. Why? Because she overheard me sneeze, and then bless myself. FML
Neighbours at war
Today, a man next door has been coughing constantly for past 3 months and I can hear him despite closing my windows. During the day there's construction noise and at night this asshole. I asked him many times to close his windows but he won't. Now I play coughing on a speaker at the same time he starts, just to piss him off. FML
Home sweet home
Today, my neighbor yelled “Fuck you!” at me through his window. My crime? Closing my front door “too loud.” This man lets his children beat on the walls and slam doors but apparently I’m the problem. FML
Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML
Asshats everywhere
Today, I've suffered 3 months of my neighbor blasting his music so loud, it shakes my apartment floor. None of my noise complaints are ever followed up, but the moment I give him a piece of my mind, he calls the cops, and they threaten me with jail time over a few curse words. FML
Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML
Today, I sneezed in the shower. When I got out, I got a text from my creepy old neighbor saying "Bless you". FML
Today, I have to wear earplugs in my own apartment because my neighbor won't turn down his music. My landlord doesn't believe me because "people with disabilities can't be rude." FML
Today, my neighbor yelled at me because, according to him, the sound of me scraping the ice off my windshield wakes him up every morning. This is the same neighbor who ran over my mailbox last week because there was too much snow on his windows to see properly. FML
Today, my boss forced me to come into work despite having a bad cold. While waiting a table, I violently sneezed and sprayed a child's face with snot. His dad got so pissed that my boss had to pretend to fire me just to calm him down. FML
Top comments
thatguynamedsky 32
well thats snot nice
KaidensCrow 18
start sneezing into a megaphone
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Comments (57)
bnbhimp 10
Make all the noise you are legally allowed to make.
Soverain 15
Instead of bitching about it. How about he makes you a nice bowl of hot soup to make your cold go away. Sneezing problem solved.
KaidensCrow 18
or if it bothers him that much, he could buy some medicine.... but attempting legal action seems more appropriate apparently... and that my friends is why I'm a felon. because people want to jump to legal action and my county loves the money they make no matter the innocence of people involved.
callabos921 14
Your passive aggressive attitude says so much.
KaidensCrow 18
who's passive aggressive attitude?
worldclassrager 41
And then the cops come for no reason...unless you are in an apartment with walls "made or tissue paper"...
samlovesham1234 9
What the ****?
Lorrali 16
Sneeze on him
megalggggg 19
complain about him
Jones87 11
You poor bastard
TomeDr 25
As a fellow loud-sneezer with seasonal allergies, I feel your pain!
GeorgiaBea 28
Lucky for you if the cops actually show up- they are more likely to yell at your neighbor for filing a false report than you for a noise complaint...