Today, my boyfriend has been sulking like a moody kid all day, all because I won't set my phone background to a picture of his dick. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend came over and dropped off my phone, which I'd left at his place the night before. He immediately left in a sulk. As I looked through my texts, I discovered he was only so moody because I hadn't answered any of his calls or messages. I'm dating an idiot. FML
Today, I sent my boyfriend a dirty picture to turn him on. He texted back: "Jfc, why wud u tease me like that?? Srsly fuck off". FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted me to send him a pic of myself being happy for his phone's caller ID. So I picked out a picture where I'm grinning a big grin, clearly very happy like he asked. He replies back, "You look weird there. Send a pretty one." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd rather jerk off to sexy pictures of me than actually have sex, because he gets too tired. FML
Today, I tried to send my boyfriend a sexy picture. I took a close up picture of my face, and, trying to be sexy, had my naked body reflected on a mirror in the background. First thing he replied was, "Who the hell is that guy in the background?" FML
Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML
Today, my boyfriend took a selfie of us. When he turned his phone around, I saw his photos and there was a picture of him with his ex girlfriend earlier that day, despite him saying he had been at work all day. FML
Today, I decided to change my boyfriend's background on his phone. As I was in the process of changing it, I noticed his most recent picture is of a naked girl. The naked girl happened to be my 18 year-old sister. FML
Today, my boyfriend sent me a nude picture. I would have been fine with it if he hadn't taken it in his ex-girlfriend's room. FML
Today, I was looking through my boyfriends phone, when I found a naked picture of myself. Too bad I haven't sent him any. Ever. FML
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Top comments
MidnightRain3 16
Just tell him it's so big, it won't fit on the screen. Stroke his ego without having to get your hands dirty. ;)
saffy66 34
I'd be a little concerned about what he's using as his own phone background...
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Comments (57)
DivineZero 18
Well did he want it to be your lock screen or your home screen?
PhinIt2WinIt 24
well that is a good question actually.
klawzor 17
Why is your comment negative?
Stephencharis 14
okay... I agree he is a moody doody kid.,...kids are not supposed to have girlfriends anyway....
MidnightRain3 16
Just tell him it's so big, it won't fit on the screen. Stroke his ego without having to get your hands dirty. ;)
ChristinePi 36
Or they could just be like "no thanks if someone else sees that, it's not a conversation I want to have."
Jakk100 20
I have a feeling that's what OP said, which is why the boyfriend was moody.
capnbzarr 43
The answer he deserves would be more along the lines of, "Sorry, it's just too small to get a clear photo!"
MidnightRain3 16
#37 Well that's no fun! :P
Shlalg 15
Or how about telling him to put his big boy panties on and get over it? She shouldn't have to pander to him because he's so immature he wants his genitals as her phone background. Your phone is with you at all times out in public, people see that crap.
luk32 9
Maybe it's worth to consider whether to upgrade your boyfriend... to more mature version which is less buggy about stupid things.
saffy66 34
I'd be a little concerned about what he's using as his own phone background...
emeraldisle 30
Say you'll do it only if he does it first. Then maybe he'll understand why you said no.
Arestian 14
actually thats a good idea he should put a picture of his dick on his lock screen then maybe he will find out how embarassing is that shit after people take his phone and see his lock screen
princesspeachxox 18
Set it as his face and ask if he likes that photo of his dick
khorstmye 15
I think that would be a photo of her dick
NH_Freelancer 19
That was my thought exactly since he's being one.
worldclassrager 41
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Is his background your breasts vulva or ******? Just wants you to return the favour if it is...
ZeusBeDubsteppin 24
...
cocainewhore 30
That makes it worse, since that would mean that the boyfriend had set a picture of OP's genitals as a background without her permission. Also, if he then used his phone in public anyone could see the photo, which would again not be fair on the OP.
sharkgirl4 23
Well, you can only zoom in so far before an image becomes distorted...
AlysoninAlaska 19
Is he still in middle school? Because that's definitely insecure 12 year old behavior.
91hayek 31
Is this what pre-teens do these days? When I was 12 the closest I came to this was trying to take clear pictures of my face with the gameboy camera without looking like some scrambled t.v image :/
Hildy93 21
Set it then conveniently leave your phone over at his parents house and see what they think of that...
yerawizardlizzy 27
Why would she purposely put herself in a situation where his parents would think poorly of her? They would come down on her, not him.