Today, my boss forced me to come into work despite having a bad cold. While waiting a table, I violently sneezed and sprayed a child's face with snot. His dad got so pissed that my boss had to pretend to fire me just to calm him down. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I have food poisoning. My boss told me that if I didn't come into work, I'd be fired. Not 30 minutes after sitting down, I sneezed and shat my pants. My boss still won't let me leave. FML
Today, my boss sneezed onto his hands and then licked them in front of my best customers. FML
Today, it's my first day at my new job. Unfortunately, I have a very bad cold. When my boss leaned in to show me something on the computer, I sneezed all over him. A hell of a first impression. FML
Today, I woke up with a sore throat and a stuffy nose. As my boss is an asshat who hates allowing sick leave, I thought I could power through it, but halfway through my workday I sneezed so hard that I threw my back out. I had to go home early and now I can't move without pain. FML
Today, at work, I was standing at the till helping an attractive man. I have a cold and could feel the snot bubbling up. He orders and we flirt for a bit. Just as I'm about to hand him his product, I sneeze quite loudly and forcefully all over his face. Guess I won't be getting that number. FML
Today, I dragged myself to work, suffering from a bad cold. My boss quietly told me to go home and rest, to avoid spreading it around the office. I thought it odd since he dislikes me so much, but I did as he said. He called later in the day to suspend me for leaving work early. FML
Today, I went back to work after being sick for a week. While I was gone, they hired a new manager. Trying to score bonus points, and possibly a raise, I went to shake her hand and introduce myself. Just as I was about to say, "Hello, my name is…" I sneezed right in her face. FML
Today, I sneezed so hard during a meeting that my glasses flew off and hit my boss in the face. Now everyone keeps jokingly ducking every time I look their way. FML
Today, while meeting some of the big boss guys at my new job, one of the men sneezed on his hand and then grabbed mine for a handshake. I felt every gooey bit of his snot between our hands. FML
Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and some new clients when I sensed that I was about to sneeze. I tried to hold it in, but ended up sneezing AND farting. FML
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Top comments
2C0OL4SCH0OL 17
It's your boss's fault for forcing you. I guess he regretted his decision but hey at least he didn't fire you for reals, well I hope you get well soon
johnjkl 22
Hope you get better op
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Comments (97)
johnjkl 22
Hope you get better op
2C0OL4SCH0OL 17
It's your boss's fault for forcing you. I guess he regretted his decision but hey at least he didn't fire you for reals, well I hope you get well soon
ThatHorse 15
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Then she goes into work the next day and the coworker finds out she's there and goes to HR saying that she showed up after having been fired. I can't imagine that situation being much better.
Lalala579121 28
17 - But, she didn't get fired...
Fmelikeuhateme 24
The kid did.
Utetopia2014 18
Whats it got to do with the co-worker, and why would they go to HR? And how many restaurants have a HR department, anyway?
rnarshmallow 21
#46 We've actually got a running joke that the accountant is HR for the kitchen where I work lol I'm not taking #17's comment too seriously but the owners or general manager would handle any HR related problems in a restaurant.
MzZombicidal 36
I'm very glad you didn't get fired but it's so upsetting to hear that you were there for that to happen anyways.
arano 29
You should've pretended to get really pissed off and stormed out.
dyoy_87 21
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
The father shouldn't have reacted so strongly
Lalala579121 28
So if a waiter/waitress sneezed in your child's face you'd just be okay with it?
klutz44 28
No, but I wouldn't demand that they be fired. That's overkill.
Lalala579121 28
The FML never said the father demanded OP to be "fired". The boss just did it to calm him down.
ElffChikk 6
I mean I personally would've thought it was hilarious if it were my kid. of course if clean him up immediately, but I would die of laughter whilst doing so.
deathmec 20
#93- You'd think it'd be hilarious for a sick person to sneeze in your childs face and get their snot all over? My only tip is to wear protection.
AnalBunny 9
Sounds like a sticky situation.
dabaerju 23
Please stop with the "_____ situation" comments. The joke is older than my great great grandmother.
higgysaurus 18
#59 really nose what he is talking about. It snot funny anymore.
tzemmy 25
Did he let you go home after that?
rachelthelime_fml 29
Get well soon, OP. Hope your boss sees sense soon
LilMissCanadian 22
He shouldn't have forced you to come to work, thus making this his fault. Get better soon.
aminehs 10
I hope you get netter soon OP, your boss is a ******** honestly he should have at least given you the rest of the day off..