Today, my daughter turned 18. She decided to use this day to tell me everywhere her and her boyfriends have had sex in my house to get revenge for being overprotective. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after I grounded my barely 18 year-old daughter for having sex with her boyfriend when I found a pack of condoms in her room while cleaning it, she responded by moving out and eloping with him. FML
Today, I learned that when my daughter spent the night at her best friend's house for her 18th birthday, they made her an account on one of those "cam girl" websites, and now every time she goes over there, she masturbates for money in front of strangers. FML
Today, my son turned 18. He now calls me by my first name instead of "dad" and refuses to stop. FML
Today, I caught my 20 year old daughter having sex with my best friend's husband. Apparently it's my fault for coming home early. FML
Today, it's my daughter’s 18th birthday. Today is also the day that my husband told me he’s leaving me for her, and he wants a divorce. When I threatened to press charges for potentially grooming her as a minor, he told me I don’t have a leg to stand on because, “She’s been at the age of consent anyway.” FML
Today, my daughter turned up at my house because her boyfriend kicked her out. I rang him and it turns out his love and affection and even the time he spent getting to know her kids wasn’t enough for her, my daughter just had to throw it all away by sucking her coworker's dick in her boyfriend's bed. FML
Today, I learned that my 18-year-old son has had more sexual partners together at one time than I've had separately in total in my life. FML
Today, as revenge for not buying her a new iPhone, my twelve-year-old daughter told her father that my boyfriend, who just moved in with us, is on the sex offender list. My ex turned my boyfriend into the cops and his parole could be revoked. FML
Today, I found out my mom can't wait until I turn 18, so she can kick me out and turn my room into a huge closet for all her clothes. FML
Today, I turned 18. My dad congratulated me and gifted me his collection of old porn magazines. Not bad, dad, but perhaps not during family dinner next time. FML
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Top comments
iAmScrubs 19
in my bed, on your bed, on the kitchen table, In the washing machine, in the sink, In your shower, on the stairs...
california283 6
a rude awakening for what? a rude awakening for actually CARING about you? my parents are overprotective too but it's for my own good. at least they care enough to protect you. some parents don't care about their kids at all..
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Comments (361)
traze 7
So don't be protective and she will do the opposite.
alpalka 2
yeah right, if she's willing to **** everyone just to get back at her dad, imagine what a **** she'd be on her own
metalhead5564 0
so basically you're saying to not really care about your daughter and she'll not have sex? great logic. real smart.
ghm1234 0
haha you shouldn't have been so protective. you should just have some standard rules.
0opsie 6
It could be either extreme. Maybe the OP was ridiculously over-protective with crazy rules or maybe they did have standard rules and the daughter was ridiculously rebellious.
Havin 19
Why did people vote thumbs down? Lol having standard rules is perfectly normal
Truth_Nazi 0
You can now legally kick her out of the house, let her f**k somewhere else
hahopps 4
lol she got u xD
MsSoulReaper 27
Well she's still your daughter and you can kick her out when ever you want if she lives in your house. I say get revenge on her by having sex on her bed, don't forget to leave your wife's panties on her pillow. ;) hah actually no don't do that, be mature about it :)
kcooper4775 0
your nasty
MsSoulReaper 27
No. You're just to innocent. :p
0opsie 6
Have sex on her bed.
StlHarper19 0
I did that to my mom too. It's ok. lol
xk75 4
cut the ungrateful ***** off, and kick her ass to the curb. she can play house with whichever of her "boyfriends" will have her.
exotica_fml 6
i agree w/ this statement!
rebecca_marie_21 0
Awesome. Kick her out.
Alycidon 1
I lol'd hard. NEVER **** about with your children's lives.
SpankyMcThrust 6
Agreed. This whole "honor your parents" mentality running rampant in these comments is starting to sicken me. I don't know how OP was nor his/her daughter, but in the case that he/she was a stereotypical overprotective ignorant parent he/she deserves it. I used to honor my parents in the typical Judea-Christian fashion until I had the realization, "Hey, these people are ******* retarded" and I've spent the latter half of my life picking up what I've missed and picking apart their stupidity oh so ingrained on my psyche. Just because someone is a parent isn't a reason for exemption of bad parenting, and no you shouldn't be honored for providing basic ******* care of child like a roof over their head and food in their stomach; that's to be expected and if you gloat on about that you're pathetic. /rant
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
I kinda agree with 282 here. Respect should be earned by both parents and kids. I'm not saying be your kids' buddy-- rules are definitely necessary, and kids can get buddies elsewhere-- but the whole "Because I said so and I spawned you" thing isn't helpful. Neither is always assuming the worst.
SpankyMcThrust 6
I've always seen you as a rational likable person Irish.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Why thanks, Spanks.
kaengelangeleyes 9
I don't agree with you at all. Even if your folks are assholes, if they had you and cared enough to keep a roof over your head and food in your stomach, you should be grateful and at the very least, respectful. If they didn't, then you can be an asshole. But if they did, you should be thankful that they kept you alive.
Pg11 0
I'm sorry but that's not how it works. I don't feel like I need to "rebel" by doing drugs or whatever, and it's NOT because my parents have cray rules. It's because they respect and trust me to be able to do the right thing, because they know they raised me right. Anyone who thinks being OVERprotective doesn't backfire is either a dumbass or can't remember their own teenage years.