Today, my daughter had a vocabulary assignment. She had to find five new words in books and movies. She was watching Shrek, so her first word was "thong". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a four-year-old said a word that I didn't know the meaning of. I had to look up the definition. FML
Today, my 4 year-old daughter's favorite expression became "shit balls." FML
Today, my teacher compared the female reproductive system to Shrek's head. Never again will I be able to watch the movies. FML
Today, my daughter said "I love you mom", to me for the first time I can remember. She is 16 years old. She said it because I bought her first thong. FML
Today, my five year-old sister won't stop saying, "Shit buckle fuckle ton." My boyfriend's excuse was that he was teaching her how to rhyme. FML
Today, I overheard my 5 year old daughter call a girl in her dance class a slut. Shocked, I asked her where she heard that word. Her response: "I heard you and Daddy say it about her Mommy." FML
Today, when I came home, my daughter's baby-sitter was busy smelling my thongs. FML
Today, my mother-in-law started chasing my kids around her house to make them smell her freshly-washed underwear. They were thongs. FML
Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML
Today, my daughter couldn't find a hair tie and thought a piece of duct tape would be a perfectly fine substitute. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
tzemmy 25
Sometimes it's just great how many adult jokes are in kid movies.
Strawburryemma01 14
does she know what it means?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (66)
Strawburryemma01 14
does she know what it means?
arano 29
Obviously not if she picked it for her new word.
NeatNit 33
It's just a different way to say "thing", right? :D
mds9986 24
It just means "narrow strip of leather." It doesn't have to mean underwear.
Nessco 36
In Australia, thongs are something you wear on your feet - not underwear. I believe you may call them flip flops.
tzemmy 25
Sometimes it's just great how many adult jokes are in kid movies.
Doberman101 29
Well a thong is a strip of leather technically speaking, and it's the first definition given in the dictionary. So I don't really see a wrong in her using it.
ThatHorse 15
The Australian definition of thong is what americans call "flip flops" too.
traveveland 16
Like zootopia
dragoongirl90 34
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Shrek isn't a kid movie.
lulinator 40
#13, used to be in Canada, too. I still call them thongs just to annoy people.
HylianWarrior 21
24, I don't know about you, but for me, my words are chosen to properly convey my thoughts, not in an attempt to confuse and annoy others, and lead to them misinterpting what I am saying
lulinator 40
So you're saying I should change my vocabulary because underwear manufacturers decided to call uncomfortable panties a word that was universally known for decades as footwear? I grew up calling 'flip flops', 'thongs', as that's what my generation learned. I find it hilarious that younger generations get annoyed at my 'historical' term. Should I also change calling the pound symbol on the phone, to calling it a hashtag so younger folk will know what I'm referring to?
mattyiscool123 26
Also rugrats
_ravens_ 11
Does she need to bring in pictures of the words too?
ViviMage 40
Tell her a thong is Australian for sandals.
ladymunchkin742 11
It's also the older crowds version of flip flops ;-) trust me my mother exclaimed that to a frenemy of my sisters when they were out shopping once buying sandals. My sister was mortified.
Lazer_Katz 10
You're smart
J352SAURUS 30
Sandals and thongs are different. Thongs are "flip flops".
pete9913 23
maybe it means flip flops, like sandals?
Nicoleu 17
Thongs are not sandles, they are totally different shoes. Trust me, I'm Australian.
Ichiya 29
Just have her use this definition: a narrow strip of leather or other material, used especially as a fastening or as the lash of a whip.
Mobbetta2300 7
Gotta start them off early, eh? Ok I'll leave...
Kitouran 30
Ew, don't force sexuality on kids.
militarybrat 21
Uh... Does someone need to call the cops? Search your computer?
nixbling 10
#15 & #44 It was a joke not a dick, don't take it so hard
FrostyyFML 15
Heh, das funny.
hunt381 22
Thong: a narrow strip of leather or other material, used especially as a fastening or as the lash of a whip.
denden_mushi 11
Did you ask her to use it in a sentence?
iMuffinKat 16
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Tell her it's an adult word and she shouldn't use it. That might buy you time.
tranced_ 45
kids tend to do the opposite of what they're told not to...
bryce0110 23
Technically it's not an adult word. A thong is a thin leather strap, commonly thought to just be a type of underwear, but that's not the dictionary definition.