Today, my cleavage got me out of a speeding ticket. That is, until the officer looked up long enough to realize I'm a guy. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I pulled over a speeding driver. I admit that I'd been hoping for this moment since I joined the police force; the moment a lady put her cleavage on display to get out of a ticket. Sadly, this lady was a senior citizen, and her breasts looked like two semi-deflated balloons. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. After the cop asked for my license, he started laughing when he saw my picture. FML
Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML
Today, as I was riding my bike, I saw a bunch of cute guys checking me out. Not paying attention, I then ran into a parked police car. Besides getting laughed at, I got a ticket for damaging police property. FML
Today, I got my first speeding ticket. Looking it over, I was surprised to see that the officer listed my height accurately despite never having seen me standing. I complimented his uncanny ability and asked if it was part of police training. He then informed me that he read it on my license. FML
Today, I had to close my eyes in shame and pretend I didn't exist, as my mom gave a cop a good look at her wrinkled, prune-like cleavage and tried to convince him that the speed limit is optional. FML
Today, I got a speeding ticket. I couldn't find my insurance card, and the cop was very nice. He said not to worry about it, that I "looked like someone who had insurance." I'm not sure how to take that. FML
Today, I got a speeding ticket while driving to my court date for a prior speeding ticket. FML
Today, after giving my husband a ton of crap about the speeding ticket he got last year, I got a speeding ticket. FML
Today, I crashed into a pole on purpose as a cop pulled me over for speeding. I figured the officer would feel bad for me and that the cost of fixing my car would be less than a ticket. He gave me one anyway. FML
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Top comments
tormcn 26
You should have taken your nipple out. Make him question his sexuality.
Miss_Mandi 29
He wasn't gay? Damnit.
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Comments (64)
Miss_Mandi 29
He wasn't gay? Damnit.
ghetto_child 19
might be time to hit the gym!
Dave_Davington 34
And after you're done hitting it, maybe head inside and do some exercise.
ohjoy15 33
Well look! Whether he was a super fit guy or a bit overweight: he still would have gotten a ticket either way. What's amazing is he managed to get out of one for some time. I'm female and I can't even make that happen...
christinamarie17 29
Take it as a compliment? You make a lovely woman?
LeashaJoy5595 28
Well, maybe not since he wasn't able to get out of the ticket, but at least he has desirable cleavage!
tormcn 26
You should have taken your nipple out. Make him question his sexuality.
Chiharo 15
Maybe wiggle it, to see if he enjoys it.
nela25 23
#freethenipple
allred1997 19
If he's that oblivious to things he shouldn't be a cop
ChloeMeyers_Xo 16
Let's be real, once a man sees a pair of breasts he is then automatically declared legally blind to the rest of the world around him. It doesn't matter if he's a cop or a crook, titts are titts.
PenguinBitch 44
They still know it's you Bruce.
EclipseCandy6 24
Were you wearing a V-neck?
Daevas 18
I feel bad now. Not because the op had cleavage, but because the cop was swayed by it -_-
SubparAtBest 23
The officer is probably well known for trying to get it on. Let me put it like this. When he walks in the room the fish stop swimming.
ZombieVampirez 24
Should of pulled your shirt down a little further. ;)
Marcelb 17
*Should have
ZombieVampirez 24
My bad. Wasn't paying attention.
AlvvaysRedPilots 9
I don't know if I should press "your life sucks" or "you deserve it"... From what I see, it's a "comical and unforgettable laughter."