Today, my cleavage got me out of a speeding ticket. That is, until the officer looked up long enough to realize I'm a guy. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I pulled over a speeding driver. I admit that I'd been hoping for this moment since I joined the police force; the moment a lady put her cleavage on display to get out of a ticket. Sadly, this lady was a senior citizen, and her breasts looked like two semi-deflated balloons. FML
Today, I got pulled over for speeding. After the cop asked for my license, he started laughing when he saw my picture. FML
Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML
Today, as I was riding my bike, I saw a bunch of cute guys checking me out. Not paying attention, I then ran into a parked police car. Besides getting laughed at, I got a ticket for damaging police property. FML
Today, I got my first speeding ticket. Looking it over, I was surprised to see that the officer listed my height accurately despite never having seen me standing. I complimented his uncanny ability and asked if it was part of police training. He then informed me that he read it on my license. FML
Today, I had to close my eyes in shame and pretend I didn't exist, as my mom gave a cop a good look at her wrinkled, prune-like cleavage and tried to convince him that the speed limit is optional. FML
Today, I got a speeding ticket. I couldn't find my insurance card, and the cop was very nice. He said not to worry about it, that I "looked like someone who had insurance." I'm not sure how to take that. FML
Today, I got a speeding ticket while driving to my court date for a prior speeding ticket. FML
Today, after giving my husband a ton of crap about the speeding ticket he got last year, I got a speeding ticket. FML
Today, I crashed into a pole on purpose as a cop pulled me over for speeding. I figured the officer would feel bad for me and that the cost of fixing my car would be less than a ticket. He gave me one anyway. FML
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Top comments
tormcn 26
You should have taken your nipple out. Make him question his sexuality.
Miss_Mandi 29
He wasn't gay? Damnit.
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Comments (64)
Baron_Kaz 15
This is a lie. No one would look at a man's cleavage, unless this "guy" is a tranny. And the officer managed to "look through".
TallMist 32
As a transgender myself, I'm kinda offended at your use of the word "tranny". Also, could you consider the fact that the officer saw his cleavage first? Hence, why the OP said "Until he noticed I'm a guy" As in, the officer didn't know OP was a guy as he was staring at his chest.
TallMist 32
Also, IDK why the word guy is in quotes. If they ARE transgender and identify as a male (And if they didn't identify as male, then the OP wouldn't be calling themselves a guy.) then they're a male. So, yeah. Don't know why that word is in quotes.
vikky538 29
I never knew guys could have a possibility to got out of speeding ticket... Even with boobs
ally8 21
If you got it, flaunt it
drrobotnik1 18
look on the bright side: at least he didn't gun you down in the street !
joshi42 16
That's one hell of a cleavage, if he saw, that you are a guy, from there.
Usernameman123 10
whats a cleavage
cjfred 13
Wait... How do you know that you almost got out of the ticket? Did the cop actually say "You were speeding, but nice rack so I'm going to let... Whoa, you're a dude! Here's your ticket, sir. You should head to the gym, but don't speed to get there."
worldclassrager 41
You caught him staring...that should do something
ChloeMeyers_Xo 16
That's okay, if it were me and a cop glanced at my chest before the rest of my body he'd probably think I was a guy. #TeamBittyTitties
Klima_fml 29
You just wait, OP. He'll fall for it next time!