Today, my boyfriend yelled at me. Apparently I'm not the "classy girl" he thought I was, and he's not comfortable "doing such vile things in public." I had tried to hold his hand. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend yelled at me from the other room for washing the dishes "too loudly". FML
Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to be romantic by dipping me backwards and kissing me. He dropped me on my butt, then stepped on my hand while trying to help me up. FML
Today, while walking on the sidewalk with my boyfriend, I slipped and fell. Not only did he not help me get up or ask if I was okay, he got mad at me for embarrassing him in public. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got into a heated argument. He raised his hand like he was going to hit me. Having been hit by my ex before, I panicked and instinctively kicked his legs out from under him. He then dumped me because he said he was just gonna scare me, but I used real violence on him. FML
Today, at a fancy date, my boyfriend said he forgot his wallet. I was instantly furious, threw a drink in his face, and yelled that he was a no-good, tiny-dicked broke loser. Dripping wine, he then said, "…but I can still pay with my phone. You didn't let me finish." FML
Today, as I was walking with my boyfriend, holding hands, a woman began screaming at us about how we "f*ggots" are "ruining America." I'm a girl. FML
Today, my drunk boyfriend flipped out and told me I was a total control freak, and that he couldn't handle how weird and clingy I am. All I did was ask if his phone was charged. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got into a fight. We yelled for 20 minutes and then he put his hands on my neck. Once we'd calmed down, he explained he wanted to strangle me like Homer does Bart, but didn't follow through. This all started when I asked if he read a text I sent earlier in the day. FML
Today, I got into an argument, followed by the silent treatment from my boyfriend, because I told him that he should change his underwear daily. FML
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Top comments
MoronsAccount1 12
I think it's time to find a man and not a boy.
Kalipczo 21
How is holding hands vile? He seems like an immature douche bag, or an overly conservative religious nut. Find someone who will want to hold your hand all the time :3
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Comments (134)
PiNkMoOn 9
it's about the way he thinks, or his familly,cause.to some people here when a girl TALKS to a boy is forbidden
combatbunny 9
Maybe he thought you were going for his dick...?
arsenicalhumor 30
Oh, how AWFUL! What's next? A meaningful conversation? You two being alone? Hopefully it never gets to some *gasp* harmless cuddling!
anthony99 14
So I guess ass to mouth is out of the question?
gc327072 31
But if you hold his hand, he could get mano! D:
miyaviichan 27
Yo that was funny. I would vote you up but I can't on my phone. Wait a sec lemme get on the computer. THE LENGTHS I GO TO. :P
Huper_ 9
Worse than my mom!
superdom 12
I love holding hands he's nuts
chuckcloninger 12
The real question here is "How you got Sheldon to agree to be your boyfriend in the first place?".
jatinbhanot 6
hmmm... sounds a lot like Sheldon Cooper.. :)
jatinbhanot 6
I guess its time to make additions to subsections on "Hand-Holding" in the relationship agreement.. :D
BobbieH 19
Yeah, you got that something I think you'll understand When I feel that something I want to hold your hand I seems like he has the sensibilities of teens of the 50's and early 60's.
buckdharma 38
#62-But by the 70's they were letting their knickers down and doing it in the road.