Today, my boyfriend was coming over so I bought this sexy corset, some fishnets, stilettos and see-through thong. After my dad left I dressed up and a few minutes later the doorbell rang. I answered it, whip in hand. It was my dad. He forgot his keys. I'm grounded. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked in on my dad and his new "girlfriend". A couple days ago I realized that my sexy clothes that my boyfriend had bought me for our anniversary was missing. Guess who was wearing it? FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that on his last visit, he snuck into the laundry and stole a lacy black thong he assumed was mine. It wasn't. It was my dad's. FML
Today, my girlfriend insisted on dressing me up in her clothes, to spice things up. After dolling me up in a dress, heels, wig, etc., she goes to the store for wine but left her key behind. Thirty minutes later, the doorbell goes, so I open it in all my feminine glory, only to see a UPS guy standing holding a parcel and not my girlfriend. FML
Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML
Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML
Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend when my dad opened the door. I thought I hadn't been seen because the door was only open a tiny bit. I then looked into the mirror by the door to see my dad's reflection, staring at mine, horrified. I was on top. FML
Today, I decided to dress up a little to go out to the bar. I put on a nice shirt, some leggings, and heels. When I walked out the door, my dad said that I looked like a whore. When I got to my boyfriend's house I told him what my dad had said and he replied, "I'd have to agree with him." FML
Today, my boyfriend picked me up to take me on a date. Just as we were about to drive away, my dad ran out of the house in his underwear and started yelling that he'd kill my boyfriend if I wasn't back home within the hour. FML
Today, I got locked in my boyfriend's garage in my underwear while his parents ripped him a new one for having sex beneath their roof. His sister had to let me out. FML
Today, I came early from my job, just to find my boyfriend in bed, with my dad. FML
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Top comments
vandaleyes 0
Rule of thumb: If you're young enough to be grounded by your parents, you're probably extremely young to be wearing that. You deserved that one.
Bauer_fml 0
"Um... I need to do this for a class."
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Comments (307)
milkman17 0
to number 3 he forgot his keys
Stakeout 0
damn!
lewalrus 4
OOOOO I LAUGHED SO DAMN HARD :)
weetfur 0
e mail?
VonBlitzkrieg 27
Email? What the ****???
suckerz 0
how old are you to dress up like that and still be young enough to be grounded???
Amkii 0
Guys, if he forgot his keys, how did he lock himself out, unless the daughter locked the door behind him? #s 9 and 2 - I agree!
blankaex 0
you lock yourself out by locking the door while its open, going outside and pulling it shut
RockThatStuff 0
#11, I lock myself out of my house all the time.
Bauer_fml 0
"Um... I need to do this for a class."
Scarlettkiss 8
Hmm...just wondering but what kind of class is that?
Zfontaine04 8
^ hardcore sex-ed
Dr_Awesome654 24
"It's a group project."
vandaleyes 0
Rule of thumb: If you're young enough to be grounded by your parents, you're probably extremely young to be wearing that. You deserved that one.
commonsensex 0
Agreed.
Eggers 2
agreed. now bend over so we can finish your punishment
bianchieiei 13
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
But she would probably be old enough to buy one?cuz in some places lyk my country nid be lyk 18+ then can.ehh jus saying
evilplatypus 39
275 - If you're too young to use proper English (or even pretend to TRY), you're too young to wear that.
sulitak 27
#275: the internet. if you have a card, you can buy it #14: agreed. that shit doesn't belong in your parents house. unless its your parents shit.
RebbeAsh 10
if your over the age of 16 in most states its perfectly legal. however you'd most likely live with your parents still and therefore could be grounded
EIDS 0
Silly *****.
uminuscooll 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
ew, you're a moron.