Today, I left on my honeymoon with my wife who is terrified of flying. The pilot announced incoming storms in the flight path, and the man next to me starts saying it's "probably fate" and "we all have to go sometime." My wife went into a full panic attack. We hadn't even left the ground yet. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while flying home, two little girls started chanting, "We're all going to die." I'm an extremely anxious flyer. FML
Today, I was on an airplane that was experiencing some turbulence. Feeling anxious, I reached over and grabbed my husband's hand for comfort. He then said, "Why are you scared of dying? You're not even pretty." FML
Today, the small plane I was on almost crashed, all because the pilot's girlfriend figured out mid-flight that he's been cheating on her, causing her to start screaming abuse and furiously beating him. FML
Today, unbeknownst to me, my wife cancelled our airplane tickets because she didn't want to face her fear of flying like we had agreed. Now, we're going to have to take another week off so I can drive 3000 miles cross country, while she sleeps in the shotgun seat because her licence expired. FML
Today, I flew to Mexico with my (now ex) boyfriend of two years. It was my first time flying, and apparently I have a fear. I had a panic attack on the plane. When we landed, I got dumped for "causing a scene." I am now stranded in Mexico alone for two weeks with no hotel room booked. FML
Today, I landed in Hawaii for my vacation. I have a really bad ear infection, and to top my day off, my girlfriend blurted out mid-flight that she thinks we're not going to work out. Aloha! FML
Today, my wife and I had an argument serious enough to end our marriage, while overseas on vacation, with my whole family present. Three more days of awkward tension until we get to fly home and it all ends. FML
Today, I went on a long flight. I was fortunate enough to sit next to a great girl. However, she must have thought I was not so great, because she moved to the empty seat across the aisle. Next to my dad. Who then told stories about how I always get motion sickness on airplanes. I then threw up. FML
Today, after being terrified for years, I went on a plane for the first time. It was also the first time I "emergency landed." FML
Today, my fiancée and I were going on our honeymoon. Our flight was delayed by two hours. It landed when our connecting flight to St. Lucia was taking off. The airline said they were holding the flight for us, so we sprinted from D gate to A, in time to watch the plane pull away. FML
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Top comments
HeroicDude 0
That's when you knock the ****** out and tell your wife everything will be ok.
cyurihsung 0
Aww jeez. Hope your honeymoon is nice, though.
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Comments (128)
scottydosntkno 1
first...and yea that sucks man
MsTs1 0
Put your wife in an asylum, she's a total retard, she poses a danger to society
the_stereotype 0
agreed. crashing or bombing jokes on a plane...never funny or appropriate and if you are one those people who jokes about it on a plane..well, you deserve what ever is coming to you after that
DrunkenValor 0
Bomb jokes on planes are the funniest kind of joke.
maddog_fml 0
@#99 Haha!! I'm sorry, but I had to laugh about this one.
Klumm 3
LMFAOOOOOOOO
lexilovesyou 0
Lol oh wow. Goood luck .(:
lonelyinMA 0
for Mr. Fate guy, trollface.jpg
inconvienentgurl 0
that sucks n u should be more concerned about ur wife!! have some consideration...the poor woman...F-HER-LIFE!! not urs!! maybe she was freaking out bc she was worried about when U R IN THE AIR!! some supporter u r...thats ur wife!! >.>
Jotham 0
I'll smack the man 1st.
reyemrein 0
I really don't get how you can be afraid of flying.... you have a way higher chance of dying while you're driving to the airport than you do in a plane crash
happy_animal_lov 0
wait... if your wife is "terrified" of flying, why the fuckerz weren't you sitting next to her? doucheface
Fenrir_fml 1
Ever heard of airplanes that have rows of seats in three or more?
turkeymonster39 0
did anybody notice at the beginning it said "left" and at the end he says they're still on the ground...?
cyurihsung 0
Aww jeez. Hope your honeymoon is nice, though.
cupcakeqt 0
third :) and enjoy your honeymoon!
pkrkid73 0
haha fail
akiro525 3
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
leave her home, you can find a **** when you arrive at the destination :P
glassisass 0
thats bad why?? i know its freaky but its **** her life. not yours... thats what i think anyway. btw ------------------------- hey people. i need a favor. when stupid starchild comments on this vid please tell him to shut the **** up. it would be very nice and would make this website better. thanks make
FarSide 23
Quite trying to suppress the free speech of others.
Ret_fml 0
How about I just tell YOU to shut the **** up instead? I agree that the shameless advertising gets annoying, but atleast he's commenting on the FMLs, and he's not harming anyone. Who made you part of the "FML staff"? -.-' They obviously have no problem with it or they would've moderated his posts already.
FarSide 23
Why in the Hell are you so angry and bitter? I was not talking to you douche bag. I don't expect you, or any other non-American to understand or appreciate freedom-of-speech. It is wasted on shit-heads like yourself.
leisl14 0
dude he wasn't even talking to you, he was talking to glass isass. chill the **** out
Ret_fml 0
Yeah. I was agreeing with you. Why would I cuss you out?
stephanieeDawnx 0
36- quit* I don't normally correct minor spelling mistakes, but when you're a total douche and are going all "I wouldn't expect any non-American to understand" You deserve to be corrected. Asshole.
iTunesAddict 0
Ouch. That's happened to me before.. but in my case, my brother was just trying to **** with me. Little bastard... I got him good when we landed. I ******* HATE flying...
plexico 4
What are you, some sort of sadist? Your wife is terrified of flying so you chose a honeymoon spot that required flying. Are you crazy? What did you get her as a wedding gift? A box of roaches, rats and snakes?
iTunesAddict 0
Agreed. Even if she said she "didn't mind", how could you fall for that? Some husband. Still, that really really really sucks.
Person1233 13
http://i28.tinypic.com/30lykhd.jpg Holy shit the FML god visited my FML account profile D:
iSmellNice 2
In addition to that, instead of calming her down, he's posting this on FML.
Intoxicunt 6
Lmao @ 52. The plexico fan-club really is growing at an exponential rate.
JukeboxBunny 0
Haha I have a feeling soon there's going to be a "Plexico, have my babies" group somewhere around...
Intoxicunt 6
I'll get right on that. I nominate myself dictator of the group. First rule: Women only. Anyone want to join? Vice-dictator position is open.
plexico 4
Thank you, all. I'm just a guy.
Intoxicunt 6
No you're not. You're several comedians sitting in a room coming up with epic lulz.
XOfiestypixie 0
I'm down for being vice-dictator! =D
Intoxicunt 6
You are elected! Welcome to the club. XD At this rate, there really is going to be a huge following of plexifans. I'll have to make a web page up. Oh, and t-shirts! Say cheese, plex! Haha.
JukeboxBunny 0
Intoxicunt: Hey! Since I came up with the idea, can I at least get a Vice-Dictator #2 spot or something? Haha
Intoxicunt 6
Yes! :) Also, I love the information on your profile. "Atheist, vegetarian.." Win.
JukeboxBunny 0
Woohoo! Now we have to figure out how plexico's going to have 100s of kids and not implode haha And thanks! [:
Intoxicunt 6
Well, you see, when two people love each other very much (or get drunk, or want money, or want to show their loyalty as a fan)...... =D
plexico 4
I like the way you all are thinking! So am I going to get to make these mini-plexicos the fun way, or am I going to get a bunch of jars in the mail (one girl, one jar -- plexico Fan Club policy) with pre-paid return postage? For expedited service, they'll send some erotic pictures of themselves to speed the fulfillment of the order. Go ahead and hand out the dictator/vice-dictator offices, just let my wife be the treasurer ;)
JukeboxBunny 0
Plexico: woah woah woah, we're just going to have to pretend you didn't just say the "w" word (wife). You'll ruin the club! [:
Cant_Touch_This_ 0
you are SUCH a ****** loser if you think plexico is funny. he is probably a 40-something virgin who just sits at home playing World of Warcraft and commenting on FML's, trying to be funny. He is pathetic to say the least. And you are MORE ****** pathetic for supporting him. **** this, man. Im starting an ANTI-Plexico club. All in favor....
Cant_Touch_This_ 0
**** you and YOU ARE NOT FUNNY. GO DIE!
omgitsafly 0
well aren't you kind of "supporting" him as well if you create an anti-plexico club? i mean if you can't stand the guy, you wouldn't let the situation ruin your day or even bring up the idea of creating a club against him. just chill out man! some people like to make friends on the site, that doesn't mean you have to interfere and be all anal about it.
plexico 4
#108, Aye! There's no such thing as bad publicity. By the way, I have an idea for a guest speaker for your club. . .
HeroicDude 0
That's when you knock the ****** out and tell your wife everything will be ok.
eatinchocolate 8
Why would you punch a man In a plane for making a joke? that's gunna get you kicked off
Scrantoncity 0
well did you still go on your honeymoon?
Shuinoshina 0
Should have punched him in the face, or had him kicked off the flight for disturbing the peace.