Today, my boyfriend of four years broke up with me by writing on my bathroom mirror in Sharpie. What did he write? "Hi, I'm Emily. I'm fat, ugly, and now single." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend dumped me by writing "we're through fat slob" on my forehead whilst I was asleep in permanent marker. FML
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Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by rapping in a voicemail. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me by putting a Post-it note on my locker that said, "Consider yourself dumped." FML
Today, my boyfriend sent me a text that said, "I can't be seen with you anymore. You're too fat." FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over the phone. He said I look too ugly when I cry to do it seriously in person. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He let me know by shaving "CYA" into my dog's fur and then moving out before I got home from work. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Trying to be the bigger person, I told him, "Your loss, not mine." He responded with, "I didn’t lose anything really. You let yourself go. Have you looked in the mirror lately?” FML
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Top comments
irateyou 9
....and better off without my douchebag of a boyfriend."
FMLandFYL2_xoxo 22
I'm sorry OP, that was so mean. You should go over to his house and key the equivalent into his car.
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Comments (214)
retrorewind 13
sounds like a inconsiderate asshole to me, after 4 years and he still hasn't the balls to tell you to your face.
monagro 22
You sure it was actually him, and that he meant it seriously?
gc327072 31
~Obviously it wasn't him, it was that one-eyed, relationship-ruining bitch named Dahlia. How come you didn't realize this?~
ohmandapants 17
Uh how would that ever be a joke? I'm pretty sure he meant it seriously.
shaagy2760 13
I'm with 74 on this that bitch dahlia man all she does is ruin my relationships
chosha_fml 27
That says more about him than it does about you, OP.
U_GotitDude 18
He sounds like a bad person anyway OP, you should be glad he's out of your life.
pieman528 10
Don't worry op, you're definitely going to find someone better out there. In the meantime though, make his life hell by subtly hinting sharpies around him everywhere. That'll freak him out. Wow.. I think I might need therapy...
jem970 19
Oh 16 dont be overdramatic :-) most FMLers think they need therapy at some point. Its also true...
amara92_fml 10
Wat a pig, you're better off without him & you will find a better guy dw :). One of my favourite quotes: "The karma of ******* over a good girl, is the trashy bitch you end up with."
DanielleinDC 34
Hey, 17, don't insult actual pigs by comparing Emily's schmuckbreath ex to them. Emily: I'm sorry you wasted four years of your life with this shallow asshole. And I hope it doesn't take you long to realize that you're better off without him.
MrItalia 18
No no no, trust me a maggot like that not worth your time! You'll find someone who respects you Em
SuperDanielNL 23
Go all greek tradegdy on his ass and poison him and his next gf. Honestly you're better off alone I'd say. But 4 years, damn that's rough.
imavelociraptor 6
Which greek tragedy was that?
SuperDanielNL 23
Medea, but there she only kills his future wife, her kids and the bride's father. Gotta translate that right now, so it was on my mind.
jem970 19
One of my favorite greek tragedies!
SuperDanielNL 23
It's nice but a real bitch to translate properly. It's my final exam.
Skinwalker131 5
27- Medea burned his new wife alive... We just finished going over it in school. It does seem a little drastic though...
Mirorbo 27
Keep it classy, fellas...
Tupelo_Honey 30
Wow, I'm sorry, OP. What a jerk, and how immature to break up with you in such a cowardly way. :-(