Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time in our relationship and it was great. He drove me back to my house and walked me to the door, then instead of kissing me goodbye he patted me on the back. Twice. FML
Today, I slept in my boyfriend's room for the first time. I also wet the bed for the first time in a decade. FML
Today, I had sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was his first time too. While in bed, he blankly stopped and stood up and got out a piece of paper from his pocket. Turns out he'd written instructions on what to do while in bed, and forgot what he had to do next. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
Today, at last, my husband instigated sex for the first time since the honeymoon a few months ago when he started fondling me in bed. Then I realised he was asleep. FML
Today, I was finally having sex with the man of my dreams, and then he fell asleep on top of me. FML
Today, I was having really great sex with my boyfriend. I was on top and he seemed like he was really enjoying it. Then, I realized he'd fallen asleep. FML
Today, I decided to have sex with with my boyfriend. After we had finished, I jokingly said, "Who's going to sleep in the wet patch?" He got up and said, "You're optimistic, I'm not staying. Oh, and I'm dumping you, that performance was disappointing." It was my first time. FML
Today, I finally had sex with my boyfriend. I had never gotten so far with a guy, so I was really nervous. He was careful, we tried different positions, "it was fun" and he came. I barely felt anything. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "What do I do now?" FML
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Top comments
omargosh 1
your fault.
butterflyhearts 0
its not really his fault. after guys cum they can get real tired. Has to do with testosterone... i think. I get tired after sex cuz of cumming all the time. really its not his fault. and for all of u who are saying that she's bad.... shut up. xoxo Perdix tell me if im right.
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Comments (148)
perdix 31
He was exhausted trying to get his pencil dick to hit one of the sides of your enormous, stretched-out ******.
apfunction 0
at least you were on top
braeleigh_king 0
@anqie you're just a little ****. you posted that "joke" thinking it would make you sound cool, but right as one or two people said your a ***** you got all defensive and tried to convince everyone here that it is not true and never happened. you are acting like "oh so nobody thinks that's cool? well psshhh then I never did that..haha you think I would actually do that? gross..." shut the **** up you fake bitch. enough said.
braeleigh_king 0
i agree with #91.
psychoxxxinvader 3
A month? Really?
bombtastic 10
didn't think an education consisted of using a q instead of a g. you must be one of those girls who typesz lyk disz
minenotyours 0
OP that's when you do something kinky like bite his neck or lick his chest to wake him up and be all cute about him falling asleep :)
dumdeedum 0
#101 i agree completely
brightbug 0
??? what the heck just happened? comments always get so huge and messed up on here :) and the fake beeotchhh who's the joker needs to shut up cuz nobody cares about her. we aren't talkin bout u sweetie, so HUSH UP. jeez. and don't use craptrap in the same sentence as religion ;) not kind. hah these comments aren't as bad as the ones that debate the importane of animal and human lives though :D
brightbug 0
*importance