Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his mom for the very first time. After shaking my hand and looking me up and down, she loudly proclaimed, "She doesn't have the right hips to have kids." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my boyfriend's mom for the first time. I introduced myself and went to shake her hand. She looked me up and down and said, "I don't shake hands with whores." FML
Today, I went on blind date with a guy because both our moms thought we'd like each other. Things were going really well until I got up to go to the bathroom and he says, "My mom was right, you do have perfect breedin' hips!" FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my mom. The first thing my mom did was look at her breasts and mention that no matter what happens, hers were the first that I suckled on. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I thought everything went well, until I got a text from him later saying, "Come on mom, she isn't THAT bad." FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His mom stared at me throughout dinner before finally blurting out, "I'm sorry, I can't get past the fact that you look just like his ex!" It turns out I do. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's mother for the first time. She has early onset dementia, butt was a pretty OK day. All was going well until she looked at her son and said he was skinny, which admittedly he is quite skinny, but then looked me dead in the eye and said, "You need to lose weight." FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents. We've been dating for almost 5 months and are extremely in love. His mom basically said to me, "I want what’s best for my son and you aren’t it." FML
Today, I was hanging with my boyfriend. When his mom came to pick him up, he introduced me. She talked to me politely and I thought we hit it off very well. As I was walking away, I heard her say, "That's your new girlfriend? Honey, you could do so much better." FML
Today, my mother met my boyfriend. She thought it would be appropriate to tell him that he looks just like my ex-husband. FML
Today, my girlfriend met my parents for the first time. The first thing my mom said to my girlfriend was, "Honey, are you ok? You look like you got hives." FML
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Top comments
MySonshine7 13
well the hips don't lie..
TechnicallyWrong 12
But she has a son...
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Comments (75)
JustThatPerson 21
Like everyone should be perfect, no one is.
BloodyGlass 10
"And what makes you think I want to have kids anyway?"
saffy66 34
I'd be so tempted to say, 'Unlike yourself, Saddle Bags???'
Xandriajoy10 18
She's an idiot. Hips don't determine if you can have kids or not. Some women with big hips have to have c-sections, but some tiny women find it easy.
Xandriajoy10 18
Tell her she doesn't have a pretty enough face to be married!
RedDevilOut 7
Your next words should have been "A good woman keeps her hips in shape to keep her man turned on forever" BOOM ! Cue the -just got burned- look on her face.
Rabite 28
Sure, because either a woman is supposed to birth children or be a sexy fucktoy for their boyfriends/husbands. I mean it's not like they are persons or something.
myshinynose 11
And a good man builds a house from the ground up, hunts mammoths on foot, repairs cars, has enormous muscles, a big virile beard, and shows his dominance and strength by yelling and beating his chest. After all it's your job to be a good provider and protector, isn't it?
blueknight1st 26
That's when you loudly reply "Well I don't want kids anyway so I guess my hips are fine."
Apparentlyacunt 18
I feel bad for you OP. She sounds like one of those mother in laws who is more concerned about what she can get out of your relationship, than her son being happy in a relationship.
PhoenixChick 26
If she does it again, treat her to a long, long dialogue about the current state of your ****** and fertility rates. Treat it as if you're THRILLED she's so interested in your health, and update her on it constantly. "Just letting you know, my moisture levels are perfect and I have a good amount of healthy bacteria. My ovulation is regular, but I am concerned about my labia..." etc etc.
vegantreegirl 26
Ew. What is this, the 16th century? She sounds like a jerk.