Today, my boyfriend informed me that in the event of a zombie apocalypse, he'd kill me before I got infected. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Good to know
Today, my boyfriend kindly informed me that if I ever got bitten during a zombie apocalypse, he'd love me enough to beat me to death with a tire iron. He said this because he's been having vivid dreams about it happening. I honestly don't know whether he's joking or not. FML
Today, I overheard my husband telling his friend that he wished a zombie apocalypse would happen in real life, so he could take me out back and shoot me without having to worry about going to prison. FML
Today, a baseball bat fell on my head while my boyfriend and I were cuddling. The same baseball bat that he keeps next to the bed, because he genuinely fears a zombie outbreak. FML
Today, I found out that the only way I can convince my husband to start working out is by convincing him that we are training for when the "zombie outbreak" happens. FML
Today, my vegan boyfriend told me that if he were forced to kill either his cat or me, he'd kill me because he "would never kill an animal." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I had diabetes. He won't talk to me anymore because he thinks I'll infect him with it. FML
Today, I was out apartment hunting with my boyfriend. We visited a marvelous place that ticked all the boxes on our requirement checklist, but my boyfriend was unenthused. There was just one small detail that I hadn’t factored in: it's very badly located if ever zombies attack. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I watched the new movie "The Purge." After the movie, I jokingly asked him that if the U.S. had such a purge in real life, would he participate, and who would he kill first. Without missing a beat, he said, "you." FML
Today, I got genuinely annoyed at myself when I realised I probably lack the skills to survive a Zombie apocalypse. FML
Wuss
Today, my boyfriend is completely obsessed with zombie and horror movies. I don’t care what he watches, the only problem is the big wuss has horrible thrashing nightmares. Last night he thrashed so hard, he elbowed me in the face. I have a big swollen purple knot right on my forehead. FML
Top comments
damienwatkins 0
how cute
Rota 0
That's love.
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Comments (278)
starzchick 0
who gives a shit? Like that's ever going to happen. ugh..OP you owe me 7 seconds of my life back from reading your retarded, pointless post.
udonttouchme 0
it took u five mins to read this o-o
AttitudeMel 4
Dom't you love horror movies when it takes forever for the caracters to realise that the walking ppl with deadly injuries are actually living deads?Don't believe in zombies but with all the movies made of this subject I hope I would get it a little faster :)
z3r0nline 0
wtf ur boyfriend is just gay that's all
ColdGold 6
He says that now, but if it really happened . . . you'd already be dead.
heartlessagony 0
Love is kind ;D
vtsocks 2
He is your boyfriend an you know he is into SiFi. I see it as a romantic gesture...not an FML
skwirl420 0
all is fair in love and zombies
RockTheArts2007 3
Sad day. I would rather fight the zombies of the apocalyse than be killed. Have him kill you only if you get infected.
Personsen 0
So you want to go through the pains of becoming a zombie?! You should thank him, tell him how sweet he is, and make out with him.
iabty 0
Yeah, I hope I'll have someone to that for me. Silly OP :P
arissia 0
That's cute! I realize there are better ways of showing his affection, but still!