Anonymous
United States
Today, my boyfriend informed me that in the event of a zombie apocalypse, he'd kill me before I got infected. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
DeadScared
Canada
Good to know
Today, my boyfriend kindly informed me that if I ever got bitten during a zombie apocalypse, he'd love me enough to beat me to death with a tire iron. He said this because he's been having vivid dreams about it happening. I honestly don't know whether he's joking or not. FML
Anonymous
Minneapolis, United States
Today, I overheard my husband telling his friend that he wished a zombie apocalypse would happen in real life, so he could take me out back and shoot me without having to worry about going to prison. FML
Anonymous
Walsall, United Kingdom
Today, a baseball bat fell on my head while my boyfriend and I were cuddling. The same baseball bat that he keeps next to the bed, because he genuinely fears a zombie outbreak. FML
zombieguyswife
Branson, United States
Today, I found out that the only way I can convince my husband to start working out is by convincing him that we are training for when the "zombie outbreak" happens. FML
Abendigo77
Healdsburg, United States
Today, my vegan boyfriend told me that if he were forced to kill either his cat or me, he'd kill me because he "would never kill an animal." FML
sabrinatarmine_
Carmel Valley, United States
Today, I told my boyfriend I had diabetes. He won't talk to me anymore because he thinks I'll infect him with it. FML
TBTC
Le G?vre, France
Today, I was out apartment hunting with my boyfriend. We visited a marvelous place that ticked all the boxes on our requirement checklist, but my boyfriend was unenthused. There was just one small detail that I hadn’t factored in: it's very badly located if ever zombies attack. FML
purged
Mechanicsville, United States
Today, my boyfriend and I watched the new movie "The Purge." After the movie, I jokingly asked him that if the U.S. had such a purge in real life, would he participate, and who would he kill first. Without missing a beat, he said, "you." FML
drake86
Helensburgh, United Kingdom
Today, I got genuinely annoyed at myself when I realised I probably lack the skills to survive a Zombie apocalypse. FML
scaredy cat
Wuss
Today, my boyfriend is completely obsessed with zombie and horror movies. I don’t care what he watches, the only problem is the big wuss has horrible thrashing nightmares. Last night he thrashed so hard, he elbowed me in the face. I have a big swollen purple knot right on my forehead. FML
Top comments
damienwatkins 0
how cute
Rota 0
That's love.
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Comments (278)
fuckyocouch 0
its a compliment!
hxcxrocker93 3
okay, that's probably the nicest thing he cam say. he's saving you the dear and pain of being infected. unless he intended to be an ass about it. lol
itsgen 16
wow and this is an fml? bug deal it shows he cares and doesn't want you to be a zombie think about I AM LEGON with will smith, I know that's not a zombie or if it is oh well I forget, but would you want to be like that?
kev08326 1
awww that's kind of sweet =). I would set up a stronghold in wal mart and **** shit up!
Jake1595 0
smart man, smart man
stormin972 0
You should be thankful.
trinithis 2
how the **** did this not get weeded out by moderation. not close to even be a **** my day.
rmasterpros 0
That would be cool!
smacky101 0
obviously you are fat and he knew you would for sure get infected. YDI
augepauge09 0
MLIA material