Today, my boyfriend has been sulking like a moody kid all day, all because I won't set my phone background to a picture of his dick. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend came over and dropped off my phone, which I'd left at his place the night before. He immediately left in a sulk. As I looked through my texts, I discovered he was only so moody because I hadn't answered any of his calls or messages. I'm dating an idiot. FML
Today, I sent my boyfriend a dirty picture to turn him on. He texted back: "Jfc, why wud u tease me like that?? Srsly fuck off". FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted me to send him a pic of myself being happy for his phone's caller ID. So I picked out a picture where I'm grinning a big grin, clearly very happy like he asked. He replies back, "You look weird there. Send a pretty one." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd rather jerk off to sexy pictures of me than actually have sex, because he gets too tired. FML
Today, I tried to send my boyfriend a sexy picture. I took a close up picture of my face, and, trying to be sexy, had my naked body reflected on a mirror in the background. First thing he replied was, "Who the hell is that guy in the background?" FML
Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML
Today, my boyfriend took a selfie of us. When he turned his phone around, I saw his photos and there was a picture of him with his ex girlfriend earlier that day, despite him saying he had been at work all day. FML
Today, I decided to change my boyfriend's background on his phone. As I was in the process of changing it, I noticed his most recent picture is of a naked girl. The naked girl happened to be my 18 year-old sister. FML
Today, my boyfriend sent me a nude picture. I would have been fine with it if he hadn't taken it in his ex-girlfriend's room. FML
Today, I was looking through my boyfriends phone, when I found a naked picture of myself. Too bad I haven't sent him any. Ever. FML
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Top comments
MidnightRain3 16
Just tell him it's so big, it won't fit on the screen. Stroke his ego without having to get your hands dirty. ;)
saffy66 34
I'd be a little concerned about what he's using as his own phone background...
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Comments (57)
Crinn 2
Tell him to put his big boy pants on and to grow up. A picture like that should be kept privet, not flashed for the whole world to see. Hopefully for your sake, he'll grow up.
kalbrek009 20
Is he 15 or and adult..either way, tell him to "man up" because his junk don't belong on the main screen of a phone that anyone could see.
kalbrek009 20
Better yet, tell him you don't have a "macro" lens (one that takes pics of small, up close things)
WOTAN1488 24
Aw you should've done it lol.
captainsmegma 12
I'm confused. Do you have a Dick picture of another boyfriend as your background or are you just opposed to dick pictures in general?
BobbybobGlob 3
Just saying, a boyfriend like that is a boyfriend not worth having if you ask me.
AggieMike77 12
Set your background picture as a photo of your husband... he's a big dick!
takren 2
#priorities
Avashantu 18
Your boyfriend sounds like he's 12.
RecklessNapkin 16
What the ****..