Today, my boyfriend caught me in a lie about being on my period. He memorized my menstrual cycle, but still forgot that today is my birthday. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told my boyfriend that my period was now over three weeks late. He still doesn't believe me since it's April Fool's day. But I'm not kidding. FML
Today, it’s my birthday. My boyfriend of almost 4 years completely forgot. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he could predict my periods because he keeps track of when I'm at my bitchiest each month. This wouldn't be so bad if he wasn't so accurate. FML
Today, I realized that my boyfriend‘s birthday was two weeks ago, so I immediately sent him a message as if it was today. He didn’t believe my excuses. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I woke up to a text message from my boyfriend, breaking up with me. When I commented on his impeccably bad timing, he admitted he'd forgotten it was my birthday. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend can name each and every Pokémon, but can't remember my birthday. FML
Today, my boyfriend forgot our anniversary. But it's okay; I wasn't expecting anything after he forgot my birthday, Valentine's Day, and my name. FML
Today, my boyfriend clearly stated that I was "useless" when on my period. FML
Today, my boyfriend is threatening to dump me if I don’t give him all the details of my menstruation so he can track my periods with an app on his phone. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I've missed my period, and that I think I might be pregnant. He started panicking and ended up puking in the toilet. FML
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Top comments
instnt1nfction 17
he is a genius
yourlifesfucked 0
Anyone else wondering why she was lying about her period?
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Comments (124)
austen130 0
happy birthday lol fyl
Meaningless 1
and what if they're never regular to memorize?
kitkat98_fml 0
aww. well happy birthday!!!
kayvan 8
You deserved it for not being straightforward.
JennaMarie420 2
all you had to do was tell him it came early or late. sometimes mine doesn't come when it's supposed to
neonpanda44 0
....is he really that bad in bed that you would lie so you didn't have to have sex with him???
marcyfrances 4
well it's an fml to him that you are lying!!
kensikos 6
wow you deserved it, lying to your bf, wow your stupid!!
twistedpyro 0
Liars don't have birthdays!
j_cat187 20
good thing to know some women turn psycho