Today, my boyfriend called me pretty. Not because he actually thinks I'm pretty, but because "Hey, how else is a guy supposed to get laid?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend told me I looked pretty. I said, "Aww, that's the first time you've said that to me." He replied, "Well, it's the first time you've looked pretty." FML
Today, after asking my boyfriend multiple times to be more kind and romantic, he looked at me lovingly and said, "You know, you look pretty sometimes." FML
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend, feeling pretty low. I said something along the lines of, "You like me even when I look like shit." He replied, "Ah, that's just how you naturally look." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me. I asked why, and he said, "Because sometimes you look good, and you buy me stuff." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I'm the best lay of his life. I really wish I could say the same about him. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me the reason he can't keep an erection while we have sex is that I'm not attractive enough. FML
Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that the main reason he was dating me was because he was intimidated by pretty girls. FML
Today, while out with my boyfriend, I gave a beggar some cash, who then smiled at me and said to my boyfriend, "You have a beautiful little lady, take good care of her." Flattered, I hoped my boyfriend would agree with the compliment. He turned and said, "Hear that? He said you were little." FML
Today, my boyfriend compared me to an unattractive actress. When I said it was sort of messed up to say that to me since she's not pretty, he said, "She's not as bad as you." FML
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Top comments
Psychicgirl17 18
What a dick. Dump his ass
SWhimsynBubbaS 14
You mean your ex-boyfriend?
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Comments (129)
assassinbanana0 20
Yes, because all men are the same. And let me guess, you can't find a decent boyfriend who treats you right, also. Right? Girls like you make all girls look bad >.>
JasonUMN 15
Sounds like he is a pretty little liar.
wtfwhyfml 12
And that is how you know it's time to move on to someone that can think with his larger brain.
RedPillSucks 33
Sigh. He may already be thinking with his larger brain
Iceman225 11
Clever.
MilkyFilmz 26
Ladies and gentleman, today I present to you a very stereotypical and foolish girl! Please do not feed the animals!
imtooshy 18
I seriously hope you won't just settle for that kinda guy. You need to be with one that says it and means it without a motive behind his words.
thatnucca 36
Jerks like him need to jerk off and not even get laid...
Calculate900 4
As a male, I resent that.
arsenicalhumor 30
#5, let me guess.. You HATE being called a, "bitch" but you'll go out of your way to call a guy a "prick" , "dick", or even a "selfish asshole"? Because you know every single guy in this world to say that it's typical male thinking, right?
User57777 13
I never understand how guys like that get the girl, yet I always get rejected… OP you don't deserve that.
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Lighten up on her. She's 15. She hasn't had much of a chance to think differently. Think of how all you guys were at that age. Maybe it's just me but my hormones were on fire and 99.9% of my thoughts were about getting laid.