Today, my boyfriend called me over, all just to unclog his toilet. It was clogged because he put my phone in it while he was taking a dump to see if it would actually flush. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went with my boyfriend to meet his parents. I had to excuse myself to use the bathroom, and I ended up taking a huge crap that wouldn't flush. I had to reach in and break it up with my hands just so it would flush. Only after I washed up did I notice a plunger sitting under the sink. FML
Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents. As he was loading his truck, I went inside to take a surreptitious shit. I ended up clogging the toilet, and so the first thing my mom said to my boyfriend was, "You'll have to find another bathroom; she just clogged it all up." FML
Today, my boyfriend of 6 months asked me to spend the night at his apartment for the first time. I had to poop really bad when I got there, so I used his only bathroom. He went after me, and came out a few seconds later, gagging. Apparently, I clogged his toilet. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom and proudly showed me how far back he could stand from the toilet while he peed. Unfortunately, he got distracted and peed all over the floor I had mopped just an hour before. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my boyfriend chuckling to himself. Turns out he had just clogged the toilet. When he called maintenance, halfway through explaining the problem he started hysterically giggling and had to hang up mid-sentence. This has been a reoccurring theme. FML
Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML
Today, the cute boy in my biology class I had been crushing on invited me over to study for a huge test. Once I got to his house, I really had to use the bathroom. I ended ending up taking a huge dump and clogging up his toilet. He had to come plunge it for me. FML
Today, the maintenance man for my apartment “fixed” my toilet from constantly running. Now it won’t flush. I learned this after I took a huge dump. My boyfriend was over to spend the night. FML
Today, my youngest decided my phone needed a bath in the toilet. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
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Top comments
xDaBOMBDINGERx 0
How did he call you when your phone was in the toilet..???
ILoveMyLifeSoMuc 0
Man, what a ******' ****.
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Comments (124)
mrschantelbieber 0
wow ur boyfriend is a dumdass!!
sam411411 0
actually, I take it back. she just failed at making a joke
awesomechica1229 5
uhh ever heard of a landline? that's those phones we had before cell phones ever existed!?
awesomechica1229 5
sorry meant to comment to 41 and 39
tomahawkinyouall 0
definetly made up
Melephant_fml 0
Does your boyfriend happen to be 4 years old?
MermaidSongXOXO 6
Your comment totally made me think of this... "You better watch who you're calling a child, Lois. Because if I'm a child, then you know what that makes you? A pedophile. And I'll be damned if I'm gonna stand here and be lectured by a pervert."
ohSNAPyall 27
@Mermaid: Your first comment totally made me think of that too!
Tikwichka 5
Mermaid FTW!!!
babybubz 0
LOL Family Guy
Rosalie_Haostn 0
haha mermaid I thought of that too! hah win
Domonator 16
I'm trying to decide whether to focus on: a) Your boyfriend's purposeful destruction of your electronics. b) Your boyfriend's endangerment of his own dwelling's plumbing. c) Your boyfriend's nerve in asking you to unclog said plumbing. d) The fact that you still refer to him as your boyfriend. Oh well, I'll have to go with... e) All of the above.
ohSNAPyall 27
Did he have to poop in the toilet before he threw your phone in?
HIJKay 0
Then why would she put this on FML? And even if it is water proof, the OP said he tried it while he was using the bathroom, I doubt anyone would want their phone back after that.
heavymetalman1 0
shitttt
bidoof_fml 0
Yeah, so it will still work when it's sitting in his septic tank!
squeakybaby1309 0
no offense... your boyfriend is an idiot.